Postcard from the Philippines
by antares.78
Summary: Malaysian Pacific Air. Singapore-Newark flight. "House, we have to turn around..." He had discarded that hypothesis. Actually he hadn't discarded it. He had hoped to be wrong. He should have told to the pilot to turn around immediately. And... Cuddy was right. Meningococcus meningitis. A 'WHAT IF' a bit OCC but very Huddy! COMPLETE
1. Airborne

_Hello to everyone! Just a few chapters to KIDS ending and I'm already being nostalgic..._

 _This is a completely different story and my first one in which House and Cuddy are not in an established relationship (and in which she's not pregnant *LOL*). It's set in season 3, in one of my favorite episode: Airborne. It's even the first story I'm writing in Italian and English at the same time so it's still incomplete... but I already know where I want this plot to go... so, don't worry! As a reader I hate so much incomplete stories that I really can't leave one of mine like that!_

 _Here just the first chapter! I want to finish KIDS first... but I couldn't resist the temptation to publish the first chapter as well._

 _I didn't decide about the rate of the story yet... but I know myself too well so... rate M, just as a precaution. ;)_

 _Many many thanks to lenasti16. I really appreciate your help, girl! Proof that on Huddy friends you can always count on, all over the world! Salamat!_

* * *

...

 **Chapter 1 - Airborne**

...

* * *

"We have to turn around" House said to the flight pilot entering the cockpit with the flight attendant. A piercing gaze despite his tired features.

38000 feet above the Pacific Ocean. Almost above the Arctic Circle. At least another 13 hours of flight. No antibiotics. The already infected passengers wouldn't have survived.

Cuddy wouldn't have survived...

He thought of having more time. He hoped of having more time...

...

Cuddy... breathe... c'mon, look at me... Cuddy, look at me...

Cuddy... c'mon... stay with me...

... Don't do this to me... you can't do this to me...

... c'mon...

...

* * *

He stood there. Motionless. In front of that closed door which kept Cuddy away from his eyes. The flashing lights of ambulances seeped in through the windows, illuminating the dim light of the room with red and blue glares.

...

 _"Not funny!"_ _She had told him, abruptly taking away the headphones from his ears and making him open his eyes._

 _He had held her annoyed look._

 _"Fever, headache, severe abdominal pain, and a rash all over his lower back._ _It's serious. Maybe contagious" She had said again, continuing to look into his eyes._

 _He had replied ironically, continuing to hold her gaze._

 _"Whoa! We just attended a symposium on pandemics and you run right into one on the flight home._ _Talk about a small world!"_

 _"If it's meningococcus, half the passengers on this plane could get infected and die before we reach New York" She had whispered not to be heard by the rest of the passengers, while maintaining her firm and decided tone, although he could always tell by her eyes when she was anxious._

 _Of course it could be meningitis! But it could be thousands of other things!_

 _"It's a hangover._ _He had a snootload of Bloody Marys before dinner" he said staring at her and then at the passenger in front of him, suddenly became very interested in their conversation "Or an allergic reaction to pollen, peanuts, and the semen-stained_

 _polyester blanket he's lying on."_

 _She had inhaled deeply. How she did all the times he said something exasperating._

 _"We have to turn around, House"_

 _He had looked at her, at the girl in front of him and at Keo, the flight attendant. They didn't know enough about that! Did they really want to start a panic?_ _Most likely it was really a drunken idiot!_

 _"Dr. Cuddy just meant that he might feel less nauseous if he was facing in a different direction. She didn't mean to panic a planeload of people. I'm a doctor, too._ _I am a board-certified specialist in infectious disease._ _She assigns parking spaces" he had said looking at Cuddy as she shook her head, voluntarily degrading her, perfectly aware of getting her madder._

 _Food poisoning had seemed a good alternative to meningitis! All the symptoms perfectly fitted! As long as Peng hadn't begun to have neurological signs. Ataxia was another symptom of meningitis. But the girl on the seat in front of his had the same symptoms... Come on! She hadn't really been so close to Peng. Not enough to be infected! Him in first class. Her in the second one. Monkey see, monkey barf! And as far as he knew, with her 36C tits stuffed into a 34B, she was probably really pregnant!_

 _Cuddy had shaken her head, leaning her back against the wall._

 _" Two different diagnoses. I thought you didn't believe in coincidences." She had told him, looking at him with a tired and at the same time exasperated look._

 _"I believe in statistics." he had said, standing up and starting to get his things, ignoring her "Two hundred passengers on the plane,10 should be gay, two should be with child, and one should be incredibly annoying with an extra ass chromosome."_

 _He had just glanced at her before turning around, telling her to take care of Peng while he walked toward the second class, ignoring her 'House...'._

 _He hadn't watched her until she had called his name again. The tone of her voice had caught his attention. The way in which she had pronounced again that '... House'. The way in which she had pronounced with difficulty that '..._ _House'._

 _He had been petrified as soon as he had looked at her. She had leaned against the seatback for support, bending forward as she could barely standing because of the abdominal pain, throwing up on the floor the contents of her stomach..._

 _And his heart had literally skipped a beat as soon as he had lifted her shirt..._

...

"Do you know her name?" A nurse asked him, suddenly coming out of that door and awakening him from the trance state in which he was.

He looked up at her. The dark shadows under his eyes were clouded by the red and blue flashing light of the ambulances which continued to bring there the flight passengers. But the dim light of that waiting room wasn't enough to hide the tension of his strained features. And the redness of his eyelids just enhanced the blue of his eyes.

"Cuddy" he said, running a hand over his face "Er... Lisa Cuddy. 38 years old" he added, rubbing his neck "We're Americans, and..." he made a brief pause running a hand through his hair "She's not on any medication. She was on menotropin... er... at least a couple of months ago... but she's not pregnant. She doesn't have any medical problem... nor allergies... "

The nurse looked at him with a quizzical gaze. Much more information than she expected to get from a guy met by that woman on a flight...

"Uh... and you are...?"

"Dr. Gregory House. She's my..." he hesitated, glancing at the information plaque on the door.

 _'Authorized access only to patient's relatives'_

"Um... my... _wife_..." he said.

The nurse's expression changed suddenly and she looked at him, nodding and placing a hand on his arm.

"I'm sorry..." she said as his gaze went from her face to the hand resting on his own arm "Please, come with me..."

...

* * *

Four hours in a waiting room. Without any news. Nothing. Not the role he was used to.

Peng had died soon after landing. And... Cuddy was right. Meningococcal meningitis.

He had discarded that hypothesis. Actually he hadn't discarded it. He had hoped to be wrong. He should have told to the pilot to turn around immediately. They would have earned a couple of hours. Maybe even more. The dozen passengers with symptoms had been hospitalized at Saint Joseph Hospital in Manila. All the other passenger had needed only some preventive antibiotic therapy. A couple of pills and there goes.

Everyone, including himself. But... not Cuddy.

He knew that her condition was serious. From what he knew she could have been already dead. High fever. Cervical rigidity. Vomit. Photophobia. Rash. All textbook signs of bacterial meningitis. The two pills of amoxicillin that he had forced her to swallow on that flight weren't enough in front of that pathogen. She needed at least one third-generation cephalosporin or vancomycin... and possibly both... Her condition had worsened rapidly. Her breathing had become erratic, she had started having breathing difficulty and had lost consciousness just before landing.

He looked out the window, letting his gaze getting lost in the lights of that city, now plunged into darkness.

His cane was still at the airport with his luggage... his last thought as he got in that ambulance with her... and yet... he didn't miss it as he walked up and down that room, lit only by the cold white light of neon tubes. Not that he had no pain... but _that kind of pain_ was the last thing he felt right now.

And he was surprised to feel what he felt at that moment. He couldn't name it... it was a feeling he had never felt... Because... he was human, right? So his survival instinct should have prevailed over everything else. So why now what he felt was the opposite of that ancestral instinct? _He wanted to be in her place..._

Yes, he wanted to be in her place... but the truth was that... he _should_ be in her place.

The truth.

The truth was that he was an asshole. A spoiled child who liked to annoy her just to get her attention. He had sent her in that second class just for the fun of annoying her. Why on earth didn't he have left her in that damn second class! Obvious! Again... because he was an asshole! And he had sent her straight to work on Peng, nonchalantly sipping his glass of Shirah.

He sat down on one of those white plastic chairs in the waiting room, resting his elbows on his knees and his face in the palm of his hands trying to dispel the images he still saw in front of his eyes.

 _Her eyes... staring at him but not seeing him..._

"Mr. House..." a woman's voice made him raise his head.

The same nurse of a few hours before. At least ten years older than him. Straight black hair tied in a ponytail. Just some silver hair among the black ones. The typical features of the local women. _Helen._ That was the name written on the badge pinned on her chest next to her picture.

"Kamusta na siya?" He asked in Tagalog watching the surprised expression on that woman's face at the unexpected sound of her tongue on the lips of that stranger.

 _How is she?_

"Sumunod ka sa akin... " She replied, watching him as he stood holding his leg with his hand, then following her.

 _Please, come with me..._

He walked down the hallway as if in a trance. He put on the PPE gown and mask the nurse handed him and walked through the door.

Dr. Diaz turned as he heard him coming in, and put Cuddy's folder on the nightstand, then reaching out to shake his hand. House shook his hand, looking at him for a moment before looking at Cuddy.

Pale. Too pale. Dark shadows around her eyes as her dark hair, spread on the pillow, made her look even paler.

He moved his gaze on the ECG electrodes on her chest. The same cleavage in which he peered every day and that cheered up his days.

The ECG line moved on the monitor. Each _P wave_ was followed by a _QRS complex_ and a _T-wave_ ... while a _beep ... beep ... beep ..._ rhythmically broke the silence of the room, together with the sound of the raising and falling respirator plunger.

"For now I managed to stabilize her" Dr. Diaz said, looking at him as he still stared at the monitor "I'm giving her intravenous Ceftriaxone and Vancomycin. And steroids. She's in induced coma to reduce her brain damage as much as possible. Her blood pressure is very low and she's tachycardic, but she's young and her heart seems to respond well to therapy. I had to intubate her and put her on artificial respirator, but her blood oxygen saturation is good now... Now, well, we can only wait... it's too early to dissolve the prognosis or to know if there will be a permanent damage..." he said, looking at House as he nodded.

"Salamat" he said, shaking his hand again and nodding. _Thank you._

"Puwede mong samahan ang iyong asawa dito..." Dr. Diaz replied, probably with a polite smile behind his mask, pointing to the armchair in the corner of the room.

 _You can stay here with your wife._

House nodded again and looked at him as he left the room, before looking back at Cuddy.

So different from the Cuddy he knew. He had always mocked the relatives next to the beds of patients in a coma. Talking with them as if they could hear them. Now he knew what it was like... the need to be there... It didn't matter if she could feel or not his hand holding hers... _he_ needed to feel her hand in his... and to tell her he wouldn't let her go...

He sat down in the armchair, stretching his legs in front of himself. With the _Platinum_ _Card_ in his wallet he could sleep in a five-star hotel room rather than break his back in that hospital chair in the middle of the Pacific Ocean... but that chair was the only place he wanted to be.

He tilted his head back, leaning it against the wall, and closed his eyes.

He could feel his own heart hammering in his chest and almost echoing in his ears, virtually at the same rate of the _beeps_ marking her heartbeat.

He exhaled slowly without opening his eyes. He had never paid attention to how much _disquieting_ the rhythmic, slow and puffing noise of a respirator was. Disquieting but at the same time _reassuring_. Like that _beeps_. _She was still alive_. And for now that was enough.

The humanity enclosed in that apparently trivial concept surprised him. _She was still alive_. And everything else went into the background. His mind refused to think about everything else. _Neurological damage. Permanent disability_. His mind knew even too well numbers and percentages. He was a doctor. He knew well what and how many the risks were. Too early to make predictions. She was alive, but... would she be back to what she was? Maybe he wouldn't have seen her smile anymore... maybe he wouldn't have heard anymore the sound of her voice...

And yet his _human mind_ prevailed over the _medical one_ in an ancestral defense mechanism.

He wanted her to open her eyes. He wanted to see her eyes rolling at one of his absurd demands. He wanted to see again that glint in her eyes when she glared at him. And he wanted to see the slight ripple of her lips when she held back a smile after one of their exasperating fight. Seeing her biting her lip trying not to smile, thinking that he wouldn't notice it.

 _"Do you like me, House?"_ She had asked him only a month before, the night in which he had tried to ruin her Valentine's Day date.

He had replied as always with a joke. Yeah... with yet another joke.

He wasn't just an asshole. It was a _cowardly_ asshole.

A forty-five-year old that behaved as a fifteen-year old. He was so scared of her _"no"_ that he preferred to evade that question directly. _Never expose yourself. Never show your cards_. Because in the end she wasn't the woman for him. Indeed, _he_ wasn't the man for her. How could a woman like her to want a guy like him? ... He didn't need to ask her that question because he already knew the answer.

 _Really? Did he really know?_

 _"Genes matter" he had told her when she asked him to help her find a donor for in vitro fertilization "Who you are matters. Find someone you trust"_

 _"Someone like you?" She had asked._

 _"Someone you like" He had answered._

Was it _that_ what she wanted to ask him that evening on his office door? When she had instead just thanked him for the injections?

She hadn't asked. He had pretended not to understand. And again he would have liked _to have the balls_ to have said something different.

He slowly and rhythmically tapped his head against the wall while those thoughts swirled in his mind, trying to dispel those images...

He let himself go to that sound... to that rhythmic and incessant _beep_ and to the sound of the respirator that mechanically pumped air into her lungs holding her tied to life... until tiredness got the better of him...


	2. Halo halo

**Chapter 2 - Halo-halo**

* * *

"Gaano na kayo katagal na magkakilala?" She asked him, placing a hand on his shoulder and handing him a paper bag on one of those endless nights.

 _How long have your been together?_

None used to touch him. None used to put their hand on his shoulder. Never. Well, not in his side of the ocean. But there he wasn't in his side of the ocean. He was practically on the other side of the world. 13 hours of time zone. Another world. And in a sense... another life ...

"Ahm... nagkakilala kami noong kami ay nasa kolehiyo" He replied without looking at her, after a moment of hesitation, then looking up at her nod before opening the paper bag, peeking suspiciously into it.

 _Um... we met in College._

Nurse Helen. A stranger. She had brought him a serving of _halo-halo_ that evening, before starting her night shift. A sort of snow cone. _Crushed ice mixed with candies and fruit and covered with evaporated milk._ It reminded him of his childhood. That was the taste of his childhood. That tongue was the sound of his childhood.

And she reminded him of _Marites_... his mother's maid during the years he had lived in the Philippines. How many time he had spent with her as his parents were out!

He couldn't tell her the truth and risk being thrown out of that room. But he didn't know why... in a way he didn't want to lie to her...

Helen had kept him company, stopping in that room from time to time, whenever she could, especially in the long hours of the night.

Twelve long days. Twelve endless nights.

...

* * *

"Welcome back ..." a nurse in her East Asian-accent English said, resting a hand on her arm as she tried with difficulty to keep her eyes open... failing in it...

She closed them again, running her tongue on her lips.

 _Sounds... light... colors._

 _Where was she?_ _What happened?_

"Do you know your name?" She asked her.

She hesitated. She inhaled and exhaled slowly and no other sound came out of her mouth. She felt so weak that she could barely move her lips _"... Lisa ..."_ she whispered, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath still trying to find the strength to articulate at least even her last name in addition to her first name, but failing again...

"Good" She replied, smiling "It's ok. Don't try to talk... just rest. Your husband is here..."

She had no time to reply. And she wouldn't still have the strength to do it.

 _Husband?_

She didn't remember anything. She didn't know where she was. She didn't know why she was there. But... she felt too weak. Too weak even to process that information. She could be there for a minute or days. Months, as far as she knew. The last thing she remembered was... _House._ No, not him... his voice calling her name... or maybe not... She remembered a voice calling her name... _Lisa ._.. but House never called her by her first name... sometimes she almost thought that if it wasn't for that LISA CUDDY written in capital letters on her office door, he wouldn't even remember her first name.

...

* * *

She felt like she was drunk. Very drunk. Her mind was so confused... thousands of thoughts swirling inside her skull... clouded thoughts...

Memories... or dreams... the first ones mixing with the other ones...

A hand on hers made her open her eyes.

"Hey" He said, squeezing her hand slightly and then stroking it with his thumb "How are you feeling?"

She briefly opened her eyes meeting the blue of his, but she didn't answer. She inhaled as if to say something, but she couldn't articulate any words. She just exhaled slowly and that was the only sound that came from her lips, as she closed her eyes again, too weak even to keep her eyes open.

"Don't worry..." he said, still stroking her hand with his thumb "I'm here..."

She didn't open her eyes, just savoring his touch.

 _It wasn't real._ It couldn't be real. And it was all so clouded and hazy...

But she didn't want to open her eyes. If she opened them she would have been alone. In that bed. And there wouldn't have been a man holding her hand and whispering her that reassuring _'I'm here'_...

Maybe it was the effect of the drugs. Or perhaps the very reason why she was in that hospital. _God! She couldn't remember anything._ What she knew was that her mind was completely clouded. She felt like she was perpetually on the line between sleep and wakefulness... The reality mingled with dreams.. She didn't feel pain. She felt nothing. And she wasn't scared. She was too weak even for being scared.

...

* * *

She opened her eyes after what again could be only a few minutes or days, as far as she knew...

The room took shape slowly as if the cloud in which it was slowly dissipate. She looked at her own arm. At the needle in her vein. At the drop that slowly went down along the tube. And at the hospital band on her wrist. Not the Princeton-Plainsboro one. She could hear the monitor _beeps_ that monitored her vital functions.

 _What was that place? An intensive care unit?_

She slightly moved her fingers... almost to be sure that they were hers. She could move them but she felt still so weak that she could barely do it.

 _The hand._

She didn't remember anything. But she remembered _that hand._

And there was no more _that_ hand holding hers.

She didn't turn her head to have a proof of that. She didn't need to do it. She didn't turn her head even toward the voice coming from across the room... probably a doctor discussing with someone else on the doorway... in a language she didn't know.

Only one word caught her attention.

 _"Salamat"_

Not that word in itself. She doesn't know the meaning of that word. But she knew that voice.

She slowly turned her head as the world spun and a wave of nausea closed her stomach.

"Hey... it looks like you're looking at a ghost" the same voice said, looking into her eyes as she weakly smiled.

"H-House..." she whispered, then exhaling slowly and trying to moisten her lips with her tongue.

"One point for your neurological test!" He said, smiling and looking into her eyes as he put a glass of water near her lips.

"W-what...?" She whispered as he put the glass back on the bedside table "W-what happened?"

House sat down beside her.

"The flight from Singapore. Do you remember it?" He asked looking at her as she nodded.

"We're in Manila. In the Philippines. I said the pilot to turn around. You've been here for twelve days" he said, looking at her as her eyes opened wide " _We_ have been here for twelve days" he pointed out with a slight smile.

"You're stable now. Peng wasn't as lucky as you" he said, looking as she nodded, closing her eyes for a moment as pieces of memories came back into her mind.

She opened her eyes again and the look on House's face caught her off guard. _What was that? Fear?_

The images in her mind suddenly became clear while she remembered his hand on her forehead and wrist. That look in his eyes... it wasn't _fear._ It was _terror._

She could remember the sound of his voice. She had never heard his voice to tremble. Never... except on that flight...

 _Cuddy... breathe!... look at me, Cuddy, look at me..._

She had tried not to close her eyes, but suddenly all had became dark...

The blue of his eyes was the last thing she remembered of that flight.

And his voice.

 _Cuddy, come on..._ _Cuddy, don't do this... you can't do this to me..._

 _... Come on, Lisa..._

"Next time you want to get my attention, Cuddy..." he said making her open her eyes again "... Just put on a very low-cut top!" He said with a smile and a mischievous look, watching her while a weak smile appeared on her lips and she bit her lip, then nodding slightly.

...

* * *

Cuddy was reconnected to reality by the ring of a phone. The soundtrack of _Star Wars_ could just be from House's phone.

" _Jimmy!_ I'm honored to be your first thought in the morning!" He said into the receiver looking at his watch and standing up, rubbing his leg "I'm sorry to break your heart, but _it's not you_ my last thought at night" he added as he limped toward the door hearing Wilson snort from the other end of the receiver.

Cuddy opened her eyes and looked at House's back as he left the room and disappeared through the door. She turned her head slightly toward the armchair on which he sat until a moment before. A magazine and a couple of books rested on the floor beside the armchair, together with his glasses and what was probably a now-empty paper cup of coffee.

 _Does the Earth spun backward in this side of the world or was Gregory House really by her bed while she was asleep?_

She watched him as he walked back into the room looking at the phone screen and then looking up at her, meeting her eyes just in that moment.

"Sorry..." he said staring at her "Did I wake you?"

Cuddy shook her head slightly and smiled.

"I thought of meeting _Obi-Wan Kenobi_ " she whispered still articulating with a bit of difficulty those words "... but I'll settle for a certain diagnostician" she added, looking at him as he smiled and rested the phone on her nightstand.

 _Really? No sexual jokes about... I don't know ... a lightsaber? God, she unwittingly had served him that joke on a silver platter ..._

He looked at her with a raised eyebrow almost reading her mind.

"Are you a fan of blue-eyed British actors, or were you rather interested in his _lightsaber_ , Cuddy?" He said with a mischievous look.

She smiled and shook her head.

 _Oh, well, ok! Now I recognize you!_ She thought, closing her eyes briefly and reopening them, looking at him again.

"Are you feeling better?" He asked looking at her with a completely different look from the one with which he had looked at her just a second before.

"I don't know what's in here" she said in a low voice, smiling and slightly raising the arm where the IV needle was "...whatever it is... it's wonderful" she said, smiling again.

"I take that as a yes" he said looking into her eyes. She still was weak, but the fact that she didn't answer anymore just in monosyllables was already a very good sign.

They were both distracted by a nurse who entered the room.

She said a few words to House. _In Tagalog._ And then she looked at her smiling.

 _"Kung ganun, ang suwerte ninyong dalawa... Ikaw ay may mabuting asawa..."_

"What did she say?" She asked looking at the nurse as she left the room.

"That..." he shook his head "... I'm not sure you want to know" he said failing to hold back a laugh.

Cuddy looked at him with a questioning look.

"House?" She whispered, staring at him as she generally stared at him in hospital, in _her_ hospital, when she expected something very inappropriate from him.

House laughed, shaking his head.

"That we've been lucky and that... I really have a beautiful wife" he said looking at her as her eyes opened wide.

"W-wife?" She asked, looking into his eyes.

House laughed again.

"Don't worry, you don't have a memory lapse!" He laughed watching the look in her eyes "... she and the other ones here think you're my wife..." he laughed again "Well... actually I told them that you're my wife..." he pointed out watching as she closed her eyes.

That _'your husband is here'_ ... it wasn't a dream... but... if _that_ wasn't a dream so... not even his hand holding her was...

She opened her eyes again. She was still too weak to argue, but she wouldn't anyway. The look in his eyes caught her of guard again. And even his hand that squeezed hers again, though this time only for a second.

"I'm an asshole, Cuddy ... but not so much to leave you alone in this place" he said seriously looking at her while she bit her lip "And at that time it was the first thing that came to my mind" he added, easing the tension with a short laugh.

"Thank you..." she whispered with the hint of a smile.

"Don't thank me, Cuddy" he said, laughing "I took the opportunity to peek a couple of times under your hospital gown" he added, still laughing and watching her as she shook her head and couldn't help but smile at his way of always playing down everything."

"Just ... a couple?" She asked, smiling and teasing him.

"Make it three" he said laughing "But ..." he looked at her with a very mischievous look.

Cuddy held his gaze, obviously waiting for his next joke.

"I didn't think you were a _full-Brazilian_ type, Cuddy! I was rather thinking to a _French wax_ or... I don't know... something more _natural_ , I'm an old-fashioned guy" he said, laughing, watching her as she smiled and shook her head slightly, though suddenly closing her eyes to the dizziness that movement caused her.

"Hey..." he said touching her arm "Are you ok?" He asked as his voice betrayed his concern.

"Er... yes" she replied with a faint smile opening her eyes to look at him.

"I was joking..." he said smiling slightly.

"Does this mean you never peek under my gown?" She asked looking at him and running her tongue on her lips, raising both eyebrows.

House stared at her passing in turn his tongue on his lips.

"I meant that... you're _definitely_ a _full-Brazilian_ type, Cuddy!" He replied with a mischievous gaze, looking at her as she couldn't hold back a smile and shook her head slightly.

"And... you should let me give me at least a _peek_ " he laughed "These are the kind of thing a _husband_ had to know!" He added, still laughing as she smiled and ran her tongue on her lips again.

"Yeah... sure!" She said, smiling in turn "... dream on, House!" She said patting his hand with hers.


	3. Kare kare

**Chapter 3 - Kare kare**

 **...**

* * *

House walked into Cuddy's hospital room and met her gaze just a moment as she tried to stand up leaning on her IV drip pole. Her feet touched the floor, but her balance lasted less than a couple of seconds before her knees gave way. And House wasn't quick enough to avoid her from falling on the floor.

"Shit Cuddy..." he said, taking her hand and then putting an arm around her waist, trying to lift her from the ground and helping her to lay back on the bed, trying not to lose his own balance.

She avoided his gaze and bit her lip, as if she was about to cry. Her vulnerability was a part of her that he didn't know, or rather, that she had never shown him.

"Hey, if you're aiming at my parking space in PPTH parking lot, just forget it!" He said smiling slightly, trying to make her smile.

She raised her head and looked at him, still biting her lip, but let out a small laugh as her eyes misted.

"It's just too early, Cuddy!" He said still staring at her as she nodded.

"Give time to those beautiful legs of yours to remember how to work!" He said looking into her eyes, again trying to make her smile "It's not a pyramidal damage. Balance disorders are frequent after what you've been through. You just have to be patient."

He watched as she swallowed and nodded without saying anything. What could he tell her? He wasn't Wilson. He wasn't used to comfort and support people. He didn't know the right words to do that. Actually he even wondered why he was still there... almost like there was a mysterious force keeping him tied to that room. There was no point in beating around the bush. There was no point in hiding behind excuses. He was there for her.

House's cell phone vibrated in his pocket. Given the time he didn't even need to look at the screen to guess who was the caller. _Noon,_ local time. At Princeton, _11 pm. Of the previous day._

"So... am I even your last thought before sleeping, Jimmy?" He said answering the call. He could practically _feel_ him rolling his eyes, and smiled a wry smile meeting Cuddy's look.

She continued to look at him as he spoke on the phone.

"Sure Wilson, I get it! You repeated it only eighteen times!" He said, rolling his eyes "I'm not the one with a neurological deficit!" He added snorting before rolling his eyes again as he listened to Wilson's voice on the other end of the line.

"No, not even her!" He said, looking at Cuddy "I was kidding, Wilson! And rather... don't get too used to that armchair! It will soon be claimed by the right ass" he added "You know you can't compete with that, don't you?" He said, glancing at Cuddy again.

She rolled her eyes at him however letting out a smile, then looking back at the nurse who was taking the umpteenth sample of her blood.

That smile. That was why he was still there.

 _"That's it, Mrs. House"_ she said, looking at her and smiling slightly as she just smiled back and nodded.

Wilson almost fell off the chair on which he sat.

 _"W-what?"_ He stammered in a mixture of astonishment and disbelief.

"What... _what?_ " House asked in the receiver.

 _"Mrs... House?"_

House rolled his eyes again.

" _Unfortunately for you_ , no, I didn't changed sex, Jimmy!" He said sarcastically avoiding Cuddy's gaze "So... either you also need a neurological examination or it's better for you to let go of that drink and go to sleep!" He added as he could guess him shaking his head looking at the glass of Scotch in front of him.

He looked up as he put the phone in his pocket, meeting Cuddy's gaze.

"Call him tonight... if you don't want him taking a plane to come and see how you are" he said, looking at her and smiling slightly.

"I would have already done it. If _someone_ hadn't seized my phone" she said, glaring at him and raising both eyebrows.

House ignored her, sitting down on the armchair next to her bed and staring at her, stretching his legs in front of himself.

"No work, Cuddy! Period!" He said, holding her gaze "Anyway... Wilson wants you to know that he's doing fine. He also watered the plants in your house and fed your dog" he added.

Cuddy looked at him, smiling slightly.

"I don't have a dog, House" she said smiling.

House shook his head, letting out a laugh.

"Good for it" he said, laughing "Or I guess it would have needed the intensive care too by now"

* * *

"I really don't know how to thank you" she said looking at him as he handed her a glass of water.

"It's just a glass of water" he said, smiling "If you'd like _something better_ , Cuddy, you just have to ask" he said with a very mischievous look as he watched her rolling her eyes at him.

"Don't be an asshole, House" she said, smiling "Can't you just accept my _thanks_?" She added, looking into his eyes while instead he looked away.

"I _am_ an asshole, Cuddy" He replied, though with the hint of a smile.

"Oh, I know it very well!" She said laughing "But not this time" she added, staring at him "So... thank you... for everything..." she repeated, not looking away from the blue of his eyes.

 _God, those eyes..._ Not gray. Not blue. A perfect mix of them.

He immediately drove away the image that appeared in his mind. Vivid as if it happened only the previous day. He knew what he could see into those eyes. But _those eyes_ belonged to another life. She had granted that look to other men. And she was going to grant it again to other men. To others. Not to him.

 _That ship sailed many years ago..._ he said in his mind repeating her words... _That ship sailed many years ago, House..._

Nurse Helen walked into the door smiling slightly as she approached and checked Cuddy's drip.

"Um... excuse me... I need to go to the bathroom" Cuddy said, looking at her.

God, it was so frustrating to need help even to pee! She almost regretted the catheter. At least with that she didn't need to ask for help! She would have done it by herself if her legs decided to cooperate. But she couldn't still standing by herself. Every time she tried her legs shook and her head spun... She hated to ask for help. But she couldn't help it.

And she hated being a patient. She was definitely a _not patient_ patient...

Helen helped her to sit up and she placed her feet on the ground. Cuddy looked at her as she handed her the IV pole, inseparable companion of her few trips out of that bed.

She watched Helen as her attention was caught by the sound of her pager.

"Sorry... I have to go ... It's an emergency" she said, shaking her head and looking at House, gesturing him to stand up to help _his wife_ , as he glared at her.

 _What?_

Helen knew she wasn't really his wife. He had told her in one of their nightly chats while eating home-made _kare-kare_ from a Tupperware. She was the only one he had told the truth to. Corrupted by that _pork in peanuts spiced sauce and vegetables._

 _She knew about them._

 _So? What was that? Was she doing it on purpose?_

House hesitated. And Cuddy too.

"Um... his leg..." she said, looking at Helen and then at House.

Helen put a hand on her arm smiling slightly.

"It's just a few steps" she said smiling slightly again before quickly leaving the room.

Cuddy looked at House, standing in front of her.

"No" she said, looking down at her own feet.

"Come on, Cuddy!" He said "You don't want to wet the bed, do you?" He asked in the same tone he would have used with a four-year old.

God... she absolutely needed to pee... she had postponed that as much as she could to avoid asking for help... but now her bladder left her no alternative...

She said nothing, but put her hand on his shoulder as she placed her feet on the ground, leaning with the other hand on the drip pole. House held her wrapping an arm around her waist as he could feel her clearly losing her balance slightly and leaning on him.

She inhaled deeply and just nodded as if to say she was fine.

Of all the situations in which she could be that was one of the most embarrassing. She didn't know if he was watching her, but she avoided looking at him as with one hand she lowered her panties and he helped her to sit down.

"Please... don't say anything..." she said, sitting down.

House didn't replied but the corners of his mouth lifted into a slight smile as he stood near her just staring at the door. If he could he would have given her a bit of privacy. But he couldn't risk to find her on the floor again... And of all the possible situations that one was definitely embarrassing.

"I can't..." she said exhaling loudly as her bladder refused to cooperate.

House smiled, rolling his eyes.

"C'mon Cuddy!" He laughed "It's just pee. And... it's not the first I see. Do you think _yours_ is different from the others?" He said teasing her.

Cuddy rolled her eyes in turn to that obvious innuendo and closed her eyes trying to relax.

A deep sigh escaped her lips at the sudden feeling of wellbeing that followed the emptying of her bladder and House couldn't keep from laughing.

"I thought you had to pee... not having an orgasm, Cuddy!" He laughed, not looking at her but still watching the door.

"Oh... shut up!" She said, slapping his arm, but failing to hold back a smile.

House rubbed his arm.

"You're not so weak" he said, still rubbing his arm.

Cuddy leaned again on the drip pole as she tried to stand up, then using her only free hand to fix her panties as best as she could. She kept avoiding House's eyes as she did so, then feeling again his arm around her back.

"Anyway... in my dreams I watch you as you take them off, not while you put them on!" He said, laughing, as he couldn't help but make fun of her again.

She didn't answer but gave him a glare that turned into a smile as she shook her head and leaned on him.

"Go back to bed, _woman_!" He said in an imitation of Fred Flintstone that make her let out a laugh.

"All you need is a _club, Fred_ " she said, laughing and leaning on the bed and he helped her to sat down on it.

The flash she saw in his eyes made her roll her eyes in anticipation.

"Wanna bet, _Wilma_?" He replied with a very mischievous look, looking straight into her eyes and running his tongue on his lips.

She held her gaze with a look somewhere between exasperation and amusement. She had served him that joke on a silver platter. Again. And she laughed, shaking her head.

How did he do that? Always being able to make her feel uncomfortable and at the same time _so comfortable_ ...

 _Exasperating and yet funny._

 _Unreliable and at the same time... reliable._

 _Irritating and... exciting._

 _... And, God... so..._

"Cuddy" he said awakening her from that thought while fixing the oximeter on her index and one of the ECG electrodes below her collarbone.

The tone of his voice completely different from the one of a few seconds before. _Worried?_

"You're tachycardic" he said, looking at her pulse on the monitor and then taking her wrist to check it. 102 bpm.

She met his gaze for a moment and bit her lip.

"Er... I'm fine, House" she said, looking down and avoiding his gaze.

"Do you have dizziness?" He asked taking her face with one hand and lifting her head to check her eyes.

 _Isocoric pupils. No nystagmus. Dilated pupils in the gray-blue of her beautiful eyes._

The beep on the monitor fastened even more, and she pushed his hand away from her own face, whispering a _no_ before taking off that electrode. She was good at hiding her emotions. Always. But not when a stupid electrode _literally_ read her heart.

House looked into her eyes but said nothing and just fixed it again in her left subclavian fossa, and then the other one in the right subclavian fossa, letting her to fix by herself the one on her left anterior axillary line on her last rib, practically under her left breast.

"It's everything okay?" Nurse Helen asked, walking into the room.

They looked at each other for a few seconds, then House took a step back and she turned her head slightly toward Helen, nodding and smiling slightly.

Helen smiled back, then looking at House.

"Alam kong OO ang sagot niya" she said as she walked toward the door, glancing at him as he rolled his eyes at her.

 _She would say yes..._

Cuddy looked quizzically at him.

"Er... nothing important" he said, looking at her and then again toward the door beyond which Helen was gone, unable to hold back the hint of a smile.


	4. Ensaymadas

**Chapter 4 -** **Ensaymadas**

* * *

"Eat!" He said walking into the room and looking at her practically untouched dinner tray.

Cuddy rolled her eyes at him.

"You sound like my mother when I was five, House" she said with a sigh, taking a forkful from the dish in front of her, but not bringing it to her mouth.

"You've lost weight. Eat!" He repeated watching her fork and then her as she rolled her eyes again.

"The last words I expected to hear from someone who every day mocks _my supertanker_ " she replied looking into his eyes and raising both her eyebrows.

House just stared at her without commenting, running his tongue on his lips.

 _... God, Cuddy ... you're not serious, are you? ... I have an obsession with your ass and you know it... Or... what? Is it to hear that what you want?_

He looked at her as she stared at him, staring in turn for a moment at her lips and at how she was biting that lip almost imperceptibly, before looking again at her eyes.

 _God, you want to hear it!_

"Or I have to think that a small part of you doesn't disdain my backside that much, House!" She said, raising an eyebrow with a slightly mischievous look.

The mere thought of her buttocks was enough to awaken a part of him that it was better to remain dormant... But the picture that appeared in front of his eyes didn't help at all. And not even the memory of his hands on those buttocks. And on her breast. And of how that breast perfectly fit in his palm...

"That part of me is anything but _small,_ Cuddy!" He replied with a mischievous look, looking at her straight in the eyes as she rolled her eyes.

He watched her as she shook her head and brought a forkful to her mouth, then placing that fork on the plate and pulling the tray away, then resting her back on the pillow.

"You're a bad patient" he said looking at her tray and then at her.

"I'm lying here all day, House. How am I supposed to be hungry?" She said, snorting and glaring at her tray "And I swear you have to be very hungry to eat that stuff" she said, smiling slightly and looking at him as the corners of his mouth lifted in a half smile.

"What would you like to eat?" He asked, shaking his head.

Cuddy slightly shrugged, shaking her head again "... everything but what looks like pre-chewed food" she said, watching the tray in front of herself and then looking up at House.

She raised both eyebrows and her eyes widened slightly as soon as he took a forkful from her plate and took it to his mouth. With her fork. And she couldn't help but smile at the disgusted look on his face.

"Whoa" he said placing the fork on the tray "No salt. No fats. It's definitely too much even for a health-freak like you, Cuddy!" He said, looking at her and smiling back.

"I could even eat _junk food_ " she said still smiling "Whatever but mashed potatoes. Again." She said laughing, watching him as he looked at her tray and then up at her eyes.

"Junk-food?" He asked running his tongue on his lips and raising in turn both eyebrows "I thought I knew you! I begin to think that Meningococcus really gave you some neurological damage" he said, smiling at her again.

"There are a lot of things you don't know about me, House" She replied with a slightly mischievous look.

He held her gaze.

"The coffee bar is already closed at this time. You should lodge a complaint to this hospital boss" he said with the hint of a smile, looking into her eyes.

She didn't reply, just smiling in turn.

"See?" She said, raising her eyebrows slightly "After all your boss isn't so bad" she added.

"Not at all" he said looking into her eyes with a slightly mischievous look, before turning slightly, glancing at the door.

"Can you walk?" He asked nodding toward her legs.

Cuddy smiled.

"Are you thinking of make me _break out_ , House?"

He shook his head, letting out a laugh.

"We only have one good leg _in four_ , Cuddy" he said laughing "We couldn't go very far"

She smiled, with a questioning look.

"Let's go" he said, moving closer to the bed and reaching for her.

Cuddy just looked at him, but moved the sheet that covered her legs and slowly put her feet on the ground, putting on her slippers and looking at them for a moment before standing up. House put an arm around her waist as soon as she stood up and Cuddy looked up at him, leaning on him at the same time.

"C'mon... I'm holding you" he simply said, looking at her.

She smiled and clung slightly to him.

"So we're going to be both on the floor?" She said, laughing, teasing him.

He didn't reply, merely rolling his eyes before looking at her again, as the corners of his mouth curled into a slight smile.

He hadn't touched her anymore since that day in which he had helped her to go to the bathroom. His body pressed against hers gave him a feeling that he would never have thought to feel. It wasn't a sexual contact. His arm supported her to keep her from falling as her balance was still unstable. But the feel of her body against his... he couldn't be indifferent to that feeling. To the rubbing of her hip against his leg with each step, as they walked slowly down the hallway. And to her scent. Not her usual scent. Not the enveloping and sensual one of her perfume... not the one which permeated every corner of her office. This was much lighter. Just shampoo and soap. Nothing more. And yet ...

House look up and swallowed hard trying to distract himself from that thought.

Chemistry. Biochemistry. Pure biochemistry. He was aware of that connection. And he was aware that he can't back out of what pushed him toward her. An invisible... impalpable... message among bodies. An ancestral message. The ancestral message at the basis of physical attraction.

He rationally kept her at arm's length. Right... _rationally._

And yet... her scent was enough to awaken his irrational side. Not the olfactory notes of her _Thierry Mugler_... the olfactory notes of _hers_... Shampoo and soap and... _Cuddy._

"House" she said, looking up at him, clinging to him, putting in turn one arm around his waist, as his arm loosened his grip around her.

He didn't answer and just draw her to him again, supporting her steps.

"Here" he said, stopping and looking at her, smiling slightly "Be my guest. But not get used to it" he added, rummaging in his pocket and handing her a couple of coins.

Cuddy smiled, running her tongue on her lips and looking at House and then again at the vending machine in front of herself.

"I always knew that sooner or later you would have taken me out to dinner" she said, laughing, looking at him straight in the eyes and putting those coins in the vending machine.

House looked at her as she watched that vending machine. Snacks. Cookies. Chips. Peanuts. Sweet and salted snacks. Definitely not her kind of food.

"You can do it" he said laughing "C'mon, choose something. And take for me whatever you get for you" he said, adding two more coins into the slot and watching as she typed the code on the keypad.

She handed him that unmistakable blue and white package as he sat down beside her on the bench next to the vending machine. And House couldn't help but smile.

"Oreos?" He laughed opening the package and biting one of them.

Cuddy shrugged slightly and smiled taking in turn a cookie from the package, twisting it and dividing it into two parts.

"You're not going to...?" House said laughing, looking at her and then at the half cookie covered with vanilla cream.

 _...you are!_

He shook his head as she laughed, licking the vanilla cream but covering her mouth with her other hand, before biting the cocoa cookie.

 _Fuck! How can this woman be sexy while eating a cookie!?_

He liked that side of her. He had always liked it. It was the Cuddy he had met in Michigan. The one who knew how to let herself go. The one who knew how to have fun. Different from the perfectionist control freak he had been working with for years.

"Where are you going?" She asked watching him as he suddenly stood up.

He didn't answer, but smiled slightly before quickly limping down the hallway.

She looked at him with a quizzical look as he walked back toward her with a paper cup in his hand and sat down, placing that cup on the bench between them.

"I thought the coffee bar was closed" she said, smiling and raising an eyebrow, looking at him as he nodded.

"It's closed." He said with the hint of a smile "But I'm a man full of surprises, Cuddy" he said letting out a laugh and watching her as she nodded, running her tongue on her lips and then tilting her head to the side as she watched him.

She watched him as he dipped his cookie in the milk and then brought it to his mouth. In a single bite.

"C'mon" he said with his mouth full, looking into her eyes "I know you're dying to do it too" he said looking at the cup of milk and then at her as she smiled.

Cuddy looked at him as he dipped another cookie into the milk and put it into his mouth, then dipping in turn one of her cookies into the milk.

"That's why they're _milk's favorite cookies_ " she said laughing, in turn with her mouth full, but again covering her mouth with her hand while she tasted the contrast between the bitter and salty cocoa cookie and the sweetness of milk and vanilla cream. The crunchiness of the cookie and the softness of the dipped-in-milk cookie.

Contrasts. Opposites. _So different and yet... so perfect together._

...

* * *

"I'm really starting to be worried about _the twins_ , Cuddy!" He said, walking into her room and glancing at her breakfast tray, then pointing with his cane to her chest.

Cuddy rolled her eyes and ran her tongue on her lips giving him a half-scowl.

 _Since when did he have this new obsession about what she ate or didn't?_ Even if... well... she didn't dislike so much how he kept to care about her.

"Why are you still here, House?" She said looking at him with a slightly annoyed look, but holding back the hint of a smile.

"What kind of _husband_ would I be if I leave _my wife_ alone in a foreign country?" He said, looking at her as she stared at him without blinking.

"No, House... seriously..." she said in a softer tone, shaking her head slightly.

"Fine" he said looking into her eyes and moving closer to her "Would you have abandoned _a friend_ in a foreign country?" He asked, answering herquestion with another question "Um... _an employee_..." he pointed out, looking at her again as she slightly bit her lip.

"Well... yeah..." he laughed "You maybe _yes._.." he laughed again "But I'm a gentleman, Cuddy!" He said watching her as she couldn't hold back anymore the smile that just waited to come on her lips.

"However..."

Cuddy smiled more... There was always a _"... however"_ when he said something nice.

"However... you're the only boss willing to give me a job, _boss!_ "He said, still laughing "Better for me to be sure that that _supertanker of yours_ went back in the armchair that belongs to it, or I'll have to begin to sell ice cream!" He added laughing and taking a sip of coffee from the paper cup in his hand.

Cuddy smiled, shaking her head slightly.

"If you were a _friend_..." she said looking at him with a slightly mischievous look "...you'd bring to me one of those" she said, smiling and pointing to the paper cup in his hand "I'm definitely in caffeine withdrawal" she added with another smile.

"I'll see what I can do, boss" he said, looking at her and taking another sip of his coffee "In the meantime, I brought you this" he said handing her a paper bag.

She couldn't hold back a smile as she opened the paper bag and pulled out one of those two buns wrapped in cloth napkins.

 _Home-made buns?_

 _"Ensaymadas"_ House said looking at her as she looked up at him and broke in half that sort of soft brioche with a creamy _dulce de leche_ filling.

She took a bite savoring the tasty cream that reminded her of caramel.

"It's delicious..." she said "If you made it... I swear I'm really going to marry you!" She said, laughing.

House ran his tongue on his lips.

"Not me. Helen" He laughed, putting in his mouth what was left of his _ensaymada_ and looked at Cuddy, shaking his head.

"I'll have to marry Helen then" she said, laughing and shaking her head again, swallowing that bite before speaking again "Or you should marry her!" She laughed again "She gave you a room in her house, she cooks and irons your shirts... you should really thinking about that, House!" She said, making a gesture with her hand and raising an eyebrow.

House shook his head as if to ward off that image from his mind.

"She's not my type" he said, laughing.

Cuddy looked at him. She bit metaphorically her tongue, but couldn't hold back the question that literally slipped out of her lips.

"And what's your type?"

House shook his head, letting out a laugh, still watching her as she broke into two pieces what was left of her bun and put one of them into her mouth, as if that question were random and of little importance. He reached out, quickly stealing that last piece from her hand and putting it into his mouth. Cuddy opened her mouth slightly, glaring at him, and reached out in turn, quickly taking his cup of coffee and finishing it in one long sip. She laughed as she almost spilled it all over herself and looked at him, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand and laughing again.

House couldn't help but laugh as she gave him back that empty cup.

"My type of woman..." he said, shaking his head as he looked into that now empty cup "... must have at least _an addiction_ " he said looking up at her with a raised eyebrow, as she smiled in turn.


	5. Honeymoon

_Many thanks to all of you who spent a minute to leave me a review! Thank you so much for always giving me the will to go on in this! See ya!_

 _..._

* * *

 **Chapter 5 - Honeymoon**

...

* * *

"Good morning" he said entering the room and watching her as she slightly smiled.

He tossed an envelope toward her but she couldn't catch it and it fell on the bed.

"Bad reflexes" House said with a laugh.

"Bad aims" She replied, giving him a half glare that immediately turned into a smile.

Cuddy reached for the envelope. _Two tickets for Newark._

She snorted as soon as she looked at the flight date, then looking up at him.

"We have been here for almost a month... please, tell me I don't have to be relegated in here for another two weeks" she said, shaking her head slightly.

House looked at her with a serious look, holding back a smile.

"Tired of being ' _Mrs. House'_?" He asked, this time not holding back that smile.

"No" she replied, before rectifying that, looking down "Er... yes" and... rectifying it again "... uh... I mean... no..." she said, shaking her head, unable to keep from laughing "oh my God... " she said, pausing and looking up at him again.

"Nothing personal" she said, raising a hand and smiling at him "... I'm tired of _this_ " she said looking at the bed in which she had been for weeks "... I'm not tired of you ..." she added, then realizing what she had just said and what interpretation could be given to those words.

 _Interpretation? What interpretation?_ There was nothing to interpret... She meant exactly what she said... just she couldn't believe she actually said that out loud...

House continued to look at her, but didn't reply, just holding her gaze.

"You'll have to be patient a few more days, _Miss Cuddy_ " he said, voluntarily stressing that _Miss_ "I talked with Dr. Diaz ten minutes ago" he added "Your tests are good. And you can even go to the bathroom by yourself" he said with a wink.

Cuddy nodded, smiling slightly.

"But here it says... April 15" she said looking at that ticket "Today is... April 2, right?" She said, looking into his eyes to confirm it.

House laughed.

"Don't tell to Dr. Diaz that you don't know what day it's today" he said "Or he'll reject your neurological test and you'll really have to be here another two weeks"

She looked at him and nodded, smiling slightly.

Of course she wasn't sure what day it was. In there all days were the same and sometimes she really lost track of time. It was as if world had stopped. For four weeks. And as she had landed in a parallel dimension. From the bustle of her hospital to the calm of that room. Well... even too calm, for her taste.

" _I'll be here_...?" She repeated, looking into his eyes "And you?"

He was good to notice shades... but her too. He hadn't said _'we'll be here another two weeks'_... he had said _'you'._

She looked at him as he smiled and ran his tongue on his lips.

"Since you want _a divorce_..." he said teasing her "I think I'll leave you here as I spend alone _our honeymoon_ in this tropical _Republika ng Pilipinas_ " he said pointing out those three words in _Tagalog_.

Cuddy looked at him, biting her lip and holding back a smile.

" _Republika ng Pilipinas_?" She repeated, looking into his eyes.

"Or... República de Filipinas" he pointed out in his best Spanish accent "... or simply Republic of the Philippines, Cuddy" he said, looking at her as she rolled her eyes.

Cuddy couldn't suppress a laugh.

"I got it, _Banderas_!" She said making fun of him in turn "But I'm sorry to disappoint you..." she said again, shaking her head "We can't do this _so-called honeymoon_..." she said gesturing for the quotation marks on the word _honeymoon_.

House looked at her running a hand on his chin. _God... why it was so funny bickering with her?_

"Because we're not married?" He asked looking at her as she nodded and gave him a look that was a clear _'right, House!'_

"Always the same fussy killjoy!" He replied glancing at her with a look somewhere between amused and annoyed "I always thought that the honeymoon is the only good reason for getting married" he said as she smiled "Yeah, well, that and the wedding night" he added with a very mischievous look.

"I had no doubts about that, House" She replied rolling her eyes at him but failing to hold back a laugh.

"So, actually... we can't even _get divorced_ , right?" He said, raising an eyebrow and looking at her.

"Er ...right" she replied, laughing, looking at his fake-thoughtful look.

House laughed and nodded to that answer.

"Fine" he replied standing up "Because you'll break my heart, _honey_ " he added with a melodramatic expression emphasizing that _honey_ and making fun of her again, as she rolled her eyes.

Cuddy opened her mouth to reply but closed it as soon as she saw a nurse entering the room. She smiled as she reached for the plastic cup with two pills and for the glass of water she handed her. She looked at the pills in that plastic cup and quickly swallowed them, then looking at the nurse walking out of the room. She paused for a second to look at that empty cup.

"What's up?" House asked, watching her as she stared at that plastic cup.

Cuddy turned her head toward him.

"Vicodin..." she said looking up at him "We've been here for a month..." she added, realizing only then that certainly he couldn't be able to get a regular prescription for an opioid in those four weeks.

"The easiest way to overcome an addiction is to replace it with a new addiction" he said glancing at her with a tone halfway between sarcastic and mischievous "Well... I guess I've heard something like that somewhere..." he said, still looking at her.

 _Somewhere?_ _In one of his TV show?_ And... did he mean a real new addiction... or...? ... Was it another of his puns? Because knowing House... God! ... He could even have replaced Vicodin with something stronger... something like...

He didn't miss the way in which her gaze immediately focus on his arms _. C'mon Cuddy! I'm an idiot! But do you really think I'm such an idiot to take heroin?!_

"I found a very good pusher" he said, raising an eyebrow.

Cuddy looked at him seriously, slightly widening her eyes. House held her gaze and looked at her as she looked down, shaking her head slightly.

"C'mon, Cuddy! I was kidding!" He said, laughing, as her expression didn't change at all.

House shook his head and laughed, reaching into his pants pocket and then tossing her an amber bottle which rolled on the sheets.

Cuddy turned it in her hand before looking up at him.

"Really?" She said, still looking at the label on the bottle as if she wasn't sure what she read was right.

"No" he answered seriously holding her gaze "It's Vicodin! Dressed up as Ibuprofen" he said, still looking at her as she put a couple of pills into her palm.

And he couldn't prevent the corners of his mouth from lifting up almost imperceptibly in a hint of a smile as he looked at her eyes, still fixed on those two pills.

"Since... since when?" She said without looking up.

"Since _my doctor_ took my Vicodin away" he said meeting her gaze for a moment and then looking down as he took those two pills from her palm, putting them back into the bottle "... I almost killed a six-year old because I was in withdrawal... and I almost overdosed... " he looked at her as she opened her mouth to those words but no sound came out from her lips.

"And ..." he said, looking briefly at her and then putting the bottle back in his pocket "...Since _someone_ perjured herself in front of a Judge... for me"

Cuddy continued to look at him without being able to say anything. 4 months. Four months without Vicodin. She was _the doctor_ who had taken away his Vicodin ... she was _the someone_ who had perjured herself for him ...

"But now don't flatter yourself!" He laughed, completely changing the tone of that conversation.

She smiled slightly, shaking her head.

"Anyway ... back to _us._.." he said, looking at her and taking the tickets that were still on the bed, then putting in her hands what looked like the brochure of a hotel "You can _get divorced_..." he said, making a quotation marks with his fingers as she had done just before "... or you can come with me and have a relaxing week in Boracay... white sand... ocean as blue as your eyes..."

Cuddy rolled her eyes and licked her lips.

"My eyes aren't _ocean blue_..." she said looking straight into his eyes.

He held her gaze. _Why did she always have to find a reason to quibble?_

"You're right" he said laughing "Mine are ocean blue" he said, raising his eyebrows "Yours are more like a _Monsoons-swept_ ocean" he said looking at her as she closed her eyes for a moment and tilted her head by side, however smiling slightly.

"Um... actually I don't know if this is a compliment..." she said looking into his eyes "But... I can't take a vacation, House... I've been away from the hospital for over a month..." she said in a serious tone.

"And as far as I know it didn't go on fire" he said staring at her "You were in a coma for twelve days. You couldn't get out of bed for days, not even to stand up. It's a miracle you're alive. Do you really want to get out of here and get back to work the next day?" He said seriously, still staring at her "I'm not telling you really have to come with me to Boracay, Cuddy. But give yourself time... Being able to go to the bathroom by yourself is not the same of running up and down Plainsboro hallways after a flight of nearly twenty hours and thirteen hours of jet lag"

Cuddy looked at him slightly opening her lips.

"Actually the room is already booked" he said, looking as she stared at the brochure in her hands and then looked up at him with a questioning look "... It's a long story..." he said making a gesture with his hand but snorting as soon as he read in her eyes that _'well... so tell me...'_

"Helen planned a vacation with her sister and niece... but apparently her sister had a set back and they decided to postpone it. So... well, the room is already booked and just waiting for me." He said with a shrug.

"Actually... for _us_ " He pointed out looking into her eyes.

Cuddy held his gaze for a few moments before looking again at the brochure in her hands. That _'us'_ made her a strange effect. It was a strange feeling having become in a sense a _'we'_. Or at least to be that in front of Helen's eyes. And of everyone else in that hospital.

"I tried to dissuade her" he added, looking at her as he could almost hear the sound of her thoughts "When that woman had something in her head changing her mind is almost more difficult than changing yours!" He said, looking at her as she looked up meeting his eyes again.

"I'm not the best roommate, Cuddy, but... I know how to lower a toilet seat if that's what's bothering you!" He said, looking as she smiled slightly and shook her head.

"Um... it's not because of that, House..." she said, biting her lip slightly "House, I don't... er... I'm sorry, I really have to go back... I can't..." she repeated, immediately feeling the weight of those words among them.

House didn't replied and just looked at her, nodding.

...

* * *

Cuddy rechecked the flight number on her ticket before putting it back in her purse and close the zipper.

"The cab's here" House said, appearing on the doorframe and looking at her as she nodded and took her suitcase.

They both looked for an instant at their reflection in the cab window while the cab driver put their luggage in the trunk.

They looked like a very unusual couple and not at all a well-assorted one. At least at first glance. Cuddy in a pair of black trousers and a white blouse that gave a little glimpse of her cleavage... and her _Louboutin._ House in a pair of sand-colored knee-length trousers and a khaki short-sleeved shirt. She in her _hospital-boss-ready-for-a-meeting version_ , he in a _very tourist version._

...

* * *

They walked together into the _International Airport of Manila - Ninoy Aquino_ and looked at the departures board. Cuddy's flight had half an hour of delay. House's one was apparently on time. They looked at each other and Cuddy gave him a half smile.

"You sure?" He asked, looking into her eyes.

She nodded, biting her lip slightly, and House just nodded back.

"Thank you... for everything" she said with another slight smile, as he just nodded again "Um... see you in Princeton" she said, casting another glance at the departures board and greeting him with a half smile, then turning toward her gate.

"Cuddy?"

She turned back toward him and looked at him as he slipped his hand into his pocket and then handed her an amber bottle.

She couldn't help but smile as she took it and read the label.

 _Rifampicin 600 mg. 4 pills. The prophylaxis of meningococcal meningitis._

"Just in case" he said looking into her eyes.

 _"Thanks"_ it was the only word that found its way through her lips as she slightly smiled. She watched him as he nodded, smiling back and then turning away, walking in the opposite direction to hers.

She kept to look at him as he walked away, biting her lip slightly, until he disappeared down the hallway.

 _Why the hell she felt as if her feet were glued to the floor!?_

She looked again in the same direction where House had disappeared before turning in the opposite one. She handed her luggage to the boarding-desk and looked again at the ticket in her hand. _First class. Seat 3B. By the hallway_. A 22 hours flight with a three-hours stopover in Japan. When she travelled with a friend she always reserved a seat by the window... but not when she travelled alone. She wasn't thrilled at all by the idea of being for nearly 20 hours trapped between a window and some stranger.

She sat in the waiting room. She took her book from her purse and let _Isabelle Allende_ distract her mind. For about ten minutes. She sighed realizing she had actually read four times in a row the same line without those words produced an image in her mind... and she closed the book, placing it on the empty seat next to herself.

She uncrossed her legs, stretching them slightly in front of herself and then crossed them again, looking at her watch. House's flight was gone at least twenty minutes ago. She watched the people sitting in front of her in the waiting room. A bunch of guys in their early twenties, a couple of businessmen reading their newspaper and a couple holding hands. Not far from that a woman was chatting with whom looked like her boyfriend, laughing from time to time... her hand resting on his knee. And she sighed again, taking her book and putting it back in her purse.

She smiled slightly as her hand found that amber bottle. Her thumb lightly touched the name on that prescription, while she bit her lip and tried to swallow the lump in her throat.

 _Mrs. Lisa Cuddy House._


	6. Cosmopolitan

**Chapter 6 - Cosmopolitan**

 **...**

* * *

 _Boracay._

It wasn't definitely the type to enjoy a week of sea alone, but he needed to take a break. He had thought to give up that trip when Cuddy had told him that she was going back to Princeton. Actually that trip wasn't even his idea ... it had been tempted to go back in the US with her. He didn't like the idea of her travelling by herself. For 20 hours. But that same thought had been what had convinced him about not giving up on that vacation. _It doesn't sound like him_. That same thought didn't sound like him. He had been _too_ close to her in recent weeks. Definitely too much. And now he really needed to clear his mind. She would have been fine. And back to PPTH everything would have been exactly like it was before that.

Sun and sea. For a week he didn't want to think about anything else.

He took off his sunglasses as soon as he got out the cab, in front of the hotel. It was exactly as it was on the website and on the brochure Helen had given him. She was the one to insist on him taking a vacation before going back to USA. Actually... she was the one to insist on _the two of them_ taking a vacation.

 _" Naah, kalokohan... Isa itong masamang ideya..." he had said, looking at her and shaking his head as she put that brochure in his hands, then taking her phone from her pocket to call the hotel and change that reservation._

 _You're crazy ... and this is a very bad idea._

 _"Hindi ah... Sa katanuyan nga, isa itong napakagandang ideya" She had replied, smiling._

 _It's a very good idea._

He took off his shoes as he walked along the path among the trees that led to his bungalow, savoring the feel of the sand under the soles of his feet. A bungalow on the beach, just a few steps from the ocean, in a luxury resort.

House looked around among those wooden walls. A kitchenette and a small table. He smiled and shook his head as he took the note leaning against the ice bucket in which a bottle of Moët & Chandon was plunged, and put that _'Congratulations'_ in the basket of flowers and fresh fruit.

# Mabuti... Buti na lang, mali ka... _!#_ He typed quickly on his phone, smiling a slightly bitter smile as he pressed _'enter'._

 _# Beautiful! Too bad you were wrong! #_

He moved the pillows from one of the two beds.

 _Yeah... Too bad you were wrong!_ He thought again as he looked out of the large window of the bedroom... palm trees... white sand...

Helen's reply came quickly.

 _# Who can't look back into the past can't reach his destination ;) #_

House smiled at that _adaptation_ of _'_ _Ang hindi marunong lumingon sa kanyang pinanggalingan ay hindi makakarating sa kanyang paroroonan...',_ a famous Filipino saying.

 _Look back into the past..._ At what? At those last few weeks? At the messages she constantly gave him just to deny them a second later?

He shook his head and sat down on the bed, leaving his shoes on the floor. For a few days he wasn't going to need them.

...

* * *

Cuddy looked out the window, slightly biting her lip as the flight attendant warned the passengers to fasten their seat belts for landing.

She looked around as she exited the airport door, tying her hair in a ponytail. Definitely the heat didn't suit with her clothing. She thought for a moment about stopping somewhere to buy something more comfortable, but she didn't want to risk losing her connection. The last thing she wanted was to lose that connection.

She turned the phone in her hands, watching it long before pressing the key to call that number... but her call was directly forwarded to the voicemail.

For a moment she thought she had been too impulsive and maybe she had made the wrong choice... but swallowed hard and walked through the main door of that wonderful five stars Resort. The receptionist looked at her from head to toe as she approached the desk, but smiled and greeted her, asking her how he could help her.

"Um ... May you call Mr. Gregory House, please?" She said "He arrived a few hours ago... There should be a reservation booked in his name... for two..." she said hesitantly...

She would have simply booked in turn a room, but she wasn't 100% sure of being in the right hotel... And she knew he had a reservation for two... or he wouldn't have asked her that _"You sure?"_ just before leaving...

"Yes, Ma'am" he replied looking at his computer screen and taking the phone by calling probably House's room. She could hear the classic sound of a free line, ringing again and again, but none got the receiver up. He looked at her again "I'm sorry, Madam... he's probably not there... but you can wait here if you want..."

Cuddy bit her lip imperceptibly and sighed. It was clear that he wasn't going to give her other information on where to find him. Certainly the hotel policy was to protect its guests' privacy. She took her phone and dialed House's number again, still having no answer and letting out an exasperated _"where the hell are you..."._

"It was a reservation for two" she said looking up from her phone and looking at him as he nodded.

"Yes, Madam. Double Room... honeymoon service... " he said, looking at the computer screen and letting out a smirk and a "Well... maybe then he's _busy_ and he doesn't want to be disturbed".

He bit his tongue as soon as he looked up from his computer meeting the very annoyed gaze of Cuddy. Well .. actually that wasn't a _professional_ comment at all.

 _Honeymoon service?_ Cuddy shook her head, biting her lip to avoid from letting out that half-smile somewhere between annoyed and amused. And she rubbed her neck. _God, she just wanted to take a shower and take off the damned blouse. And those even more damned heels._

"He... wasn't him alone?" She asked without getting an answer, but only a half shrug. Again definitely not very professional.

That guy wasn't very cordial. Or maybe he had just had a bad day. But sincerely she doubted that his day could have been worst of hers.

She reached into her purse taking her passport and placing it on the desk.

"Listen ..." she hissed, seriously staring at him with a look that could have frozen him despite that sultry heat "... I'm tired and sweaty and I'm not going to let _my husband_ fuck some stranger during our honeymoon just because _an idiot_ doesn't want to tell me where the hell he is! " She added, raising her voice slightly in her best _bossy_ tone, resting on the reception desk also her bottle of Rifampicin.

She watched him as he looked at that amber bottle and then at her passport and again at that bottle, before returning them to her.

"Oh... I'm sorry, ma'am... I do not... I really don't know if he was..." he stammered typing something on the screen, "I'm just replacing a colleague here and... I-I didn't mean to allude to..."

Cuddy's gaze silenced him instantly and he swallowed as her gaze froze him again with a silent _I-don't-give-a-damn-so-just-shut up-and-make-your-job-if-you-know-how-to-do-it!_

House would have recognized the amused glint in her eyes behind that apparent annoyed bossy look. But he wasn't House. And he handed her an old-fashioned key hanging on a wooden keychain.

"Your room key, Mrs. House"

...

* * *

Cuddy stood on the terrace in front of the bungalow door and looked around. The sun was already low on the horizon, giving way to a beautiful sunset.

She hesitated before entering, turning that key in her hands. She couldn't enter.

 _What if the reason for which he didn't answer the phone was that he was really busy in... er... something... with a beautiful woman?_

She shook off the image that appeared in her mind. Definitely now it was too late to go back... She took off a pump rubbing her ankle, then doing the same with the other one before knocking at the door.

She knocked once and then again, slightly biting her lip as considering whether to enter or not. She put the key in the lock, hoping with all herself not to find him really naked in front of her eyes. Um ... not to find him really naked in front of her eyes _and_ busy in a certain activity with a woman...

She sighed and took off the key from the lock. She couldn't do it. Yes, he had asked her to join him on that holiday, but he didn't even know she was there... Maybe he really was with a woman ... or in the shower... They were _friends_ but she couldn't violate his privacy in such a way.

And... _friends?_ Was that what they were? _Friends?_

They weren't really _friends_... Wilson was a friend. House was... She couldn't find a word fitting for their relationship. It was definitely more than a boss-employee relationship... it was more than a relationship between colleagues... She cared about him and not as a boss care about an employee or a colleague. She would never have perjured herself in front of a judge for any of her colleagues... But... they were not _friends_ yet... not in the strict meaning of that word. He trusted her and she trusted him. They turned to each other in times of real need, but... they didn't confide in each other... they didn't open up one with the other one... on the contrary she was definitely very careful not to open up to him or to give him some details of her private life. She knew that in a sense he would have used them against her... or he'd make fun of her...

And yet... a month spent together, and she felt like their relationship was now completely different. Would she show up on the door of that bungalow one month before? To spend a holiday week _with him_? With how many co-workers would she be willing to share a bedroom? Admitting it or not, even to herself, she wanted to spend that week with him. She wanted that the alchemy that had characterized the last few weeks wouldn't end...

She still didn't know how that could have happened. How was it possible that the jerk who had sent her in the second class on that flight just to tease her and then had sent her straight to take care of Peng as he nonchalantly sipped Shirah, could be the same man who had held her hand while she was unconscious. He wasn't compelled to do that. He didn't have to and she wouldn't have blamed him if he didn't... if he just went back to USA... But he didn't... and not only he had stayed in Manila with her... he had been there, by her bed... every night... And he had taken care of her... made her laugh when she just wanted to cry... No, he wasn't _a friend_ because ... even if she kept to deny it, _the last thing she wanted was him to be a friend._

She looked at the key in her hand. Passing off herself as his wife certainly didn't give her the right to enter without asking for his permission. For a moment she consider to sit on one of those bamboo armchairs looking at the ocean and just waiting for him to come back, or for his phone to be reachable again, but the grumbling of her stomach suggested her that, despite of her uncomfortable high-heeled shoes, it would have been better for her to eat something in the meantime.

...

She sat down on one of the bar stools in front of the desk and ordered a drink. Alcohol wasn't really what her stomach needed at that time, but it was what her nerves needed.

She turned between her fingers the stick on which the fruits decorating her cocktail was skewered then bringing it to her mouth, still looking at the now virtually empty glass in front of her. The key of the room on the counter next to her phone... waiting for him to call her back.

"A Gin tonic and anotheR Cosmopolitan foR the lady" a voice behind her said.

Cuddy looked up from her drink and then at the guy who had just sat down on the bar stool next to hers, then looking at the barman.

"Er... no, thank you" she said looking at that man and smiling slightly "I'm good with this, thanks"

 _God, he was at least ten years younger than her._ Italian. Because of the unmistakable accent and that _strong R_. A handsome guy... tight jeans and an Emporio Armani t-shirt highlighting his muscles and tan... but... she was definitely not in the mood...

"If such a beautiful a woman sat here all alone, staring at what's left of her drink... she's definitely not _good with that_ " he said looking at her with piercing dark eyes reaching for her then shaking her hand.

 _Marco._

She could barely hear his name as an arm wrapped her shoulders making her nearly jump.

"I can't leave you alone for a couple of hours that you already cheat on me, _honey_?"

She froze at the feeling of his stubble against her skin as he kissed her cheek. And she couldn't tell if the sudden chill that ran down her back despite of those 100°F was due to that contact or to the look in his eyes as the blue of his met hers.

"Greg House" he said, reaching for that guy and shaking his hand, then looking at Cuddy again "The receptionist phoned me telling _my wife_ had arrived" he said, raising an eyebrow, staring at her "Sorry, _babe_ , my phone battery went off" he said squeezing her shoulder in his hand and looking at her and then again at _that_ Marco, who gestured them a goodbye.

Cuddy couldn't help but biting her lower lip holding back a smile as she watched Mark walking away, then looking at House.

"Couldn't you help it, could you?" She said failing to hold back a laugher as he shook his head and sat down beside her, ordering a Scotch and another Cosmopolitan for her. And this time she didn't refuse it.

...

"So?" He asked, sipping his Scotch and watching her as she took in turn a sip of her drink "Did you decided to wait another seven days before _filing for divorce_?" He said, smiling and raising an eyebrow.

Cuddy shrugged slightly and put her glass on the counter before looking up at him.

"Er... sorry" she said, smiling "It was the only thing that came to my mind to know where you was" she added, reaching out for her drink again and taking another long sip.

House looked at her and smiled, shaking his head slightly and giving a nod to the barman, who nodded back and placed in front of him two small bowls. Olives and a mix of nuts.

"You told him you're my wife, and he bought it?" He asked smiling and pushing towards her those two bowls.

Cuddy laughed and nodded, taking an almond and turning it between her fingers.

"Er... actually I think the exact words were... _I'm tired and sweaty and I'm not going to let my husband fuck some stranger during our honeymoon just because an idiot doesn't want to tell me where the hell he is!_ "she laughed, rubbing her neck and looking into his eyes with a slightly embarrassed look then bringing that almond to her mouth "...apparently I can be very persuasive sometimes" she added, laughing again.

"I know that" he laughed in turn.

He looked at her as she finished that drink and finished his in turn in a long sip.

"So? Ready to fulfill your _marital obligations_ , _honey_?" He said, standing up and looking at her with an extremely mischievous look, deliberately emphasizing again that _'honey'._

"Dream on, House!" She replied glaring at him but failing to keep from laughing.

 _God, she had drunk too much._ Actually only two drinks... but on an empty stomach that was enough to make her feel slightly euphoric.

She took off her pumps before standing up. _God... she felt lightheaded._ Not so much not being able to stand up, but enough to have difficulty walking on her heels.

House continued to look at her out of the corner of his eye as she walked beside him, barefoot, holding her shoes in one hand.

"Where did you leave your luggage?" He asked turning toward her and slipped his hand into his pocket to get the key, then slipping it into the lock.

"Probably at 38000 feet above sea level by now. Or still in Japan waiting for the connecting flight. I don't know" she said, shrugging and smiling slightly.

House shook his head and smiled, looking at the door, and not at her. Irrationality was certainly not one of her features. But apparently the control freak he knew had remained on that flight from Singapore to Newark. The one in front of him was barefoot, disheveled, with a now creased blouse from the long day and... absolutely beautiful.


	7. Spaghetti all'arrabbiata

**Chapter 7 - Spaghetti all'arrabbiata**

* * *

Cuddy looked around and dropped her pumps next to the sofa in front of the TV in that small living room. The remote control was tidily set next to the TV and no glasses were on the coffee table. She looked at the bottle of Champagne on the kitchen table, now immersed in a bucket of melted ice, and lightly touched with her fingertips the flowers in the basket, as the hint of a smile appeared on her lips at the sight of that note.

"Blame Helen for that! It wasn't me!" He said nodding toward the note in her hand.

Cuddy smiled as she looked up at him and nodded, putting that note back in the basket.

"Me on top and you on bottom, _wife_?" He said with a mischievous look, stopping on the bedroom doorframe "Or you on top and me on bottom, _boss,_ if you like to be bossy even in bed!" He said looking at her as her eyes widened and she opened her mouth slightly.

"C'mon, I was joking, Cuddy! There are two beds" he said watching her as she walked into the bedroom "But if you want to stay on top of me all the same, I..."

"Shut up, House!" She said seriously, but unable to hold back the laughter that escaped from her lips just a second after.

If only he knew what she had feared to see on that bed! She smiled, looking at those sheets, slightly crumpled just in the spot where he had probably sit down staring out the window, then watching his luggage next to the bed and to his black and yellow Nike.

There were two beds ... but not really two rooms. A king-size bed and a queen-size bed on the opposite sides of that bedroom and separated by a screen.

She looked at House as he sat in that same spot of what he had decreed to be his bed. And she couldn't shut up.

"Why the smallest one to me?" She said, raising an eyebrow.

House rolled his eyes but the corners of his mouth curled into a half smile.

"King... queen" He said, making a gesture with his hand towards each bed "Even if at work you're the one metaphorically wearing pants, boss... I still have _something_ you didn't" he said, raising an eyebrow again.

Cuddy didn't reply, merely glaring at him and running her tongue on her lips.

"Hell, _woman._ Do you need proof?" He said, staring at her and starting to undo his belt.

Cuddy couldn't help but laugh, shaking her head and raising a hand.

"No, wait! Okay!" She laughed, covering her eyes with her hand "Ok! I'm sorry" She laughed again " _Queen_ will be fine. Luckily there's not a _bitch-size_ " She laughed again as he laughed in turn and did up his belt.

"However... if you're going to bring here that _Marco_ you'll have to be very quiet" he said with a very mischievous look pointing to her bed with a nod of his head and then staring at her as she rolled her eyes.

"I promise I'm not going to have sex with him in here, okay?" She replied laughing "But anyway I think he won't dare to approach anymore since you literally made him run away, House!" She said glaring at him and shaking her head, but again failing to hold back a smile.

House looked into her eyes without reply, just staring at her for a few seconds.

"So... literally... could you have sex with _someone else_ in here, Cuddy?" He asked with a mischievous look, still staring at her.

Cuddy held his gaze, but couldn't avoid slightly biting her lip.

"Or... having sex _with him_ out there, under the porch, House" she replied with a challenge look, staring at him in turn.

...

* * *

She definitely need a shower. 100°F and a high rate of humidity. The blouse she wore was practically fused with her body. She took it off, placing it on the sink, and locked the bathroom door before walking into the shower, letting the warm water to wash away the tension of that day.

She poured a little shower gel in the palm of her hand and abandoned herself to the light coconut scent of that soft foam.

She felt decidedly reborn. Even more while she rubbed her body with that soft coconut-lime body lotion. One of the benefits of a deluxe room when your luggage is 38,000 feet above the ocean. Too bad that, on the contrary, she had absolutely nothing clean to put on. The first thing scheduled for the following day would have certainly been a morning of shopping at the Mall.

She wrapped herself in the terrycloth bathrobe and brushed her hair, before exiting the bathroom.

House was no longer there.

She bit her lip as she looked around in the silence of those two rooms, watching the fruit basket still on the table and the completely melted ice in the bucket from which the Champagne had been taken off.

 _Come on, Lisa! What did you expect? It's a holiday. Did you really expected that he wanted to spend the entire evening with you? ... What were you thinking...?_

She wasn't sure that had been a good idea... She had been impulsive... and it was absolutely not like her to be impulsive...

She sighed as she sat on her bed but she couldn't help but bite her lip as she took the clean T-shirt he had left on her pillow. _God, could he read her mind?_ Yeah, well, not that was a news actually... One step forward... and two steps back. After all, that have been their game for twenty years. So... why now did she feel _like that_?

She put on _his_ shirt, not surprised at all of how much huge it was. Those "short" sleeves covered half of her arms and the hem of that shirt covered her backside and part of her thighs. She smiled at the thought of how actually she didn't feel so _"small"_ in front of him... Yes, of course, her heels gave her some inches, but he looked down on her anyway... and yet ... she knew she had always been able to stand up to him and she never felt intimidated by him... well... _almost never..._

She thought for a moment about watching TV or going straight to bed, but lying in a bed again was the last thing she wanted to do... And it was not even 9 pm... Maybe she should order something to room service, but she wasn't hungry... even because it was impossible to be hungry since her stomach seemed to have been put in a spin cycle.

She went out on the terrace under the porch and sat down on one of the bamboo armchairs looking, beyond the palm trees, at the ocean just a few feet from her. Actually in the darkness she could only see the reflection of the moon on it, but it was relaxing by the same. She snuggled with her knees to her chest, just listening to the sound of her own thoughts swirling in her head in the calm of that night, away from the noise and bustle of the many pubs not far from there.

House was probably there. Leaning against a pub counter sipping Scotch and listening to music. Sipping Scotch and listening to music maybe _with a beautiful woman_... She shook her head slightly trying to dismiss that thought and wrapped her T-shirt more around her body, inhaling deeply and trying to swallow the lump in her throat. The scent of that T-shirt was not helpful at all in that. Not while _his_ scent enveloped her body, awakening in her the desire to be in his arms, feeling the roughness of his stubble on her lips, the warmth of his skin under her hands, his tongue in her mouth... every inches of him on her... and inside h...

"Please... tell me you have nothing underneath that T-shirt!" A unmistakable ironic voice said making her practically jump.

And she met his eyes. His gaze ran from her bare feet to her legs, curled up against her chest, and to the hem of what was his own T-shirt, covering just her hips and completely revealing her thighs.

"Geez, you gave me a heart attack, House!" She replied suddenly sitting better in the armchair and instinctively lowering her shirt, trying to cover her thighs as much as possible.

House just looked at her with a slightly mischievous smile and she thanked the dim light of that porch. From the way her heart was hammering in her chest, she knew that she couldn't hide the blush that those thoughts had unleashed on her cheeks, and even less the dilation of her pupils.

"If you're waiting for your _Italian Latin lover_ it's better for me to go inside" he said, nodding toward the door.

Cuddy bit her lip slightly and smiled, holding his gaze.

"You're not allowed to peek out, House" she said, raising both eyebrows and running her tongue on her lips "And I'm sorry to disappoint you but I'm not for threesome" she added with the same look, staring at him.

House stared back at her.

"How few you know me, Cuddy? Selfish and possessive guys don't like _to share_ " he said looking at her again.

Once again she thanked the dim light of that porch because the way he looked at her suddenly made the muscles in her most intimate part to contract, triggering a whirlwind of sensations of which she didn't want to make him aware. The dilation of her pupils would have been enough to make him aware of what was happening inside her. _Adrenaline. Dopamine._ Hormones... and she couldn't control them.

No, she couldn't control them. How she couldn't help but bite her lip even imperceptibly. She was good to control the reactions of her body and to stand up at his jokes. It was one of the things he found irresistible about her. The way she could keep up with him and to reply to him. Apparently unmoved at everyone's eyes, as if his jokes couldn't touch her at all. Unmoved at everyone's eyes... not at his eyes. And he knew her too well. Even if right now that dim light protected her privacy.

"What are you doing here, House?" She asked trying to change the subject of that conversation "I thought you had better plans for the night" she added, raising an eyebrow.

"Better than ruin _your own plans_ for the night, Cuddy?" He replied with a mischievous look.

"Oh right" she replied with the same look "you have pleasure from my frustration" she said nodding, still looking at him.

"A new form of sadism" he replied holding her gaze.

Cuddy nodded.

"Be careful" she added lightly biting her lip with the hint of a smile, standing up and making a couple of steps toward him "... someone would rather think that you like to keep me company" she said, placing a hand on his arm and looking at him straight in the eyes, before looking away and opening the door, going inside.

House looked for a moment at his own arm, at the spot where she had placed her hand, almost as if that hand had left a visible mark on his skin. He looked up, following the sway of her hips, unable to prevent his gaze from lingering on the hem of that T-shirt caressing her thighs with every step.

And he smiled, biting his lip in turn.

...

"Well, Cuddy" he said entering the door in turn and closing it behind him "You can seek pleasure with an Italian stranger... or... try one of the Italian pleasures" he said again with a mischievous look resting on the table one of the bags he was holding.

Cuddy turned around, looking at him with a questioning look. She approached the table and looked into the paper bag then pulling out a box of spaghetti.

"Um ... I thought this five stars Resort had a restaurant service" she said smiling, looking into the bag at what was all the ingredients for a pasta sauce.

House ran his tongue on his lips and took the bag from her hands, beginning to arrange those ingredients on the table. _Garlic. Tomato sauce. Extra virgin olive oil. Dried chili peppers._

"Well... actually I don't really have a choice" she said giving him an amused glance "I have nothing to wear so I certainly can't go out without..."

"Panties?" House said in her place glancing mischievously at the hem of her T-shirt and then looking at her as she rolled her eyes.

"Pants, House" she said in the same tone she generally used when he said something inappropriate or exasperating "without... pants" she said looking at the shirt she had on and then at House as he took the cutting board and began to peel the garlic with an amused gaze.

She watched as he squashed a garlic clove with the palm of his hand and then another one.

"Tomato sauce spaghetti?" She asked with the hint of a smile, meeting his gaze across the table.

" _Arrabbiata sauce_ spaghetti, Cuddy!" He replied, looking into her eyes as she rolled her eyes again, however, not holding back a smile.

"Actually it should be _penne_ " she said with a challenge look he knew even too well, meeting his questioning look as he looked up from the cutting board "It's _penne all'arrabbiata_. Not spaghetti" she said, teasing him on purpose and looking at him as he rolled his eyes and snorted, then gesturing her to take a pan and help out instead of always wanting to have the last word.

Cuddy just smiled. House who cooked? This was definitely a news! She didn't know why but she had always thought that like any bachelor he just lived of take-away and at most of canned or frozen foods.

And House looked at her as she bent over to take that pan. Just long enough to lift her shirt, slightly revealing the point where her legs turned in her buttocks. And that was enough to House because _something else_ lifted in his groin.

The garlic cloves sizzled in the oil together with the chili peppers, releasing their intense aroma in the small room, before the tomato sauce joined them...

House put the spaghetti in boiling salted water and lifted the lid of the pan looking at the small bubbles bursting on the surface of the sauce. Cuddy looked at him as he stirred the sauce with a wooden spoon then bringing it to his mouth, and she immediately drove away the thought that for a millisecond flashed in her mind.

 _God... she would have liked to be that spoon..._

She turned and took from the refrigerator the bottle of Champagne that had been part of _their_ welcome basket. God... she needed to be into that fridge at least for an hour to cool what she felt within herself...

She filled two glasses and handed one of them to House. No toast... but they looked for a moment at each other as they both took a sip and that wine warmed their throats.

House watched as she took another sip of wine, watching him as he drained the pasta, leaning with her lower back to the kitchen furniture. He knew that those few sips were enough for her to feel lightheaded as a few hours before in that drink bar. And that couple of almonds he had silently invited her to eat were certainly not enough to fill her stomach alleviating the alcoholic effect of the Moët & Chandon. Not enough to get drunk, but enough to loosen her inhibitions. Enough to slightly blush her cheeks and to make her smile more.

He put the two plates on the table and looked at her as she rolled a few spaghetti on her fork.

"Oh my..." she said, closing her eyes as soon as she put that forkful of pasta in her mouth a "...oh my God ..." she repeated, laughing and looking up from her plate meeting his gaze "... it's great... " she laughed again, running her tongue on her lips, then covering her mouth with her hand.

House couldn't help but laugh.

"If you add an _'oh yeah'_ and a _'oh please, more'_ I'll even think you're having an orgasm, Cuddy" he said looking into her eyes.

Cuddy rolled her eyes. He wouldn't have expected anything different from that look and that towel tossed toward him which hit his chest, then falling on the ground. But he wouldn't have instead expected the way in which she smiled, then letting herself go to a genuine laugh.

"They say that chili pepper is an aphrodisiac, right?" She said, still laughing.

God ... an aphrodisiac was definitely the last thing he needed right now. Not with her sitting in front of him, wearing nothing but his own t-shirt, and her laugh filling his ears with one of the most beautiful sounds on earth. He settled in his chair trying to think about something else. _The money he owed to Wilson._ _A bedsore_. _A horrible bedsores_. Too bad that no matter how he tried but he couldn't instead not think of _her_. Of the way she touched her neck. Of the way her eyes sparkled as she laughed. Of her tongue running on her lips after every mouthful to clean them from the sauce. God... he wanted to do that with his own tongue. Slipping a hand under that T-shirt. Because... God... it was obvious that she wasn't wearing a bra under that T-shirt. She was not wearing it because... certainly a perfectionist like her couldn't wear dirty clothes after a shower. And... she could even deny it but... if she was not wearing a bra then she was not wearing either her...

 _Fuck!_

He tried to settle in his chair, trying to lighten the tension growing in his pants and watched as she took another long sip of champagne from her glass.

"So... you can even cook! What else don't I know about you?" She said, laughing and touching her neck, placing her glass on the table.

"There are many things you don't know about me, Cuddy" he said looking into her eyes, using the same words she had used with him, watching as she nodded and then couldn't hold back another laugh.


	8. Filipino breakfast

**Chapter 8 - Filipino breakfast**

* * *

A couple of knocks on the door reconnected House's mind to the world in the exact moment in which Cuddy walked out of the bathroom and passed by his bed heading to the door. He ran a hand on his face and opened his eyes, looking at her as she exited the room.

The same T-shirt of the previous night. _His_ T-shirt.

That T-shirt was definitely twice her size. And that pure observation awakened in him feelings he thought to be dormant after all those years. The sensation of her minute body against his. Of her body in his arms. The feeling of how he could wrap her body with just one arm.

He watched as she exited the room, tying her hair in a pony tail, careless, _or maybe not_ , of the fact that that gesture expose her thighs even more than how they already were...

He let the aroma of coffee filled those two rooms before deciding to get out of bed.

He put on a pair of shorts and took a clean T-shirt from his suitcase, then putting it on as he walked into the kitchen, glancing at the breakfast tray on the table.

"That's _puto_ " he said, looking at Cuddy as she watched that sort of rice wrapped in a leaf, next to a bowl of mango and a cup of what looked like hot chocolate "it's a steamed rice cake" he added meeting her eyes and... her smile.

He held her gaze for a few seconds before looking at the other plate. _Sinangag_... fried rice, _longanisa_... a kind of sausage, fried quail eggs and coffee... Well, definitely that wasn't for her.

"You know, I could really get married to a woman who makes me find breakfast in the morning, Cuddy!" He said with a slightly mischievous smile.

Cuddy laughed, shaking her head.

"I think _I_ 'll have to resign _myself_ then" she said looking into his eyes and handing him a note. ' _Helen'_ was the only word she could decipher of that note. Besides that international _emoticon_.

 _Nagawa mo na ba yung nararapat kapalit ng almusal na ito? Ay naku! Sigurado akong OO yunh magiging sagot niya. O baka nga nag-OO na siya ;) Helen._

House didn't replied and just looked into her eyes, taking that note from her hand. Cuddy continued to look at him as his lips curled into a slight smile at the words on that note.

 _So? Do you deserve this breakfast? Come on! She'll say yes. Or maybe she already did ;) Helen._

"What does she say?" She asked, smiling and taking a sip of her chocolate, watching him as he looked up from that note and looked at her.

"That... I do need a nourishing breakfast to regain energy after tonight" he said glancing mischievously at her and watching as she rolled her eyes and shook her head slightly, taking another sip of her chocolate.

She placed her cup on the table and looked at him again, as her fingers fiddled with the edge of her cup.

"Anyway... she really knows you very well" she said, smiling, nodding to his plate "What's weird is that... she knows me well too!" She said looking at her own dish with a raised eyebrow, looking up at him and bringing to her mouth a piece of mango.

 _Of course she knew her!_ He had told her things about himself, and about Cuddy, that he had never told anyone. Not even to Wilson. Things about himself that he would never have thought he wanted to share with someone... Why... her? He didn't know. It was a strange harmony. Not sexual attraction. She was like a sort of... big sister. She was like Wilson. A sort of female version of Wilson. But in a way she was more than Wilson. Because, unlike Wilson, she could think like a woman. Like Cuddy. And that allowed him to fill some of the missing pieces of the complicated unsolved puzzle that Cuddy was.

He was so focused on the thought that he almost didn't realize that he had spilled his cup of coffee, as long as that boiling liquid soaked his T-shirt startling him.

"Holy shit!" He exclaimed, standing up to that sudden sensation, while Cuddy stood up in turn looking at him as he quickly took off his soaked shirt, crumpling it and then using it to wipe his chest.

A few knocks on the door caught the attention of both of them and they looked at each other for a moment before Cuddy went to open it. House met the gaze of the boy on the doorframe as he greeted Cuddy with a _'Good morning Mrs. House'_. A vaguely mischievous _'Good morning Mrs. House'_ that certainly didn't go unnoticed to him. But not even to Cuddy. She closed the door unable to avoid from smiling to herself, slightly biting her lip, looking down at her own T-shirt and then at House.

He was half-naked. And her too, since she wore just with his T-shirt. In front of the eyes of a stranger they were clearly a newlywed couple after what had certainly been a night of passion. And maybe even a newlywed couple _... just interrupted_ during a moment of passion...

"Er... I'd better get dressed!" She said looking at the contents of the bag which that boy had just brought her from the laundry "And you too, House!" She said looking into his eyes with a slightly embarrassed look as she could almost still feel that guy's look on herself.

"Yeah" he said with a mischievous smile "Because ... you know that even that guy is now wondering if you had your panties on, right?" He added with a look somewhere between a challenge look and an amused one, looking at her bare thighs and then again at her eyes.

Cuddy rolled her eyes and opened her mouth to reply, but was interrupted by the ring of House's phone.

"JIMMY!" He said emphatically in the phone still staring at her, with a look that said _'saved by the phone!'_

Cuddy bit her lip and House couldn't help but running his tongue on his lips as he looked at her. He watched her as she took her own cell phone checking the calls, then closing her eyes for a moment and biting her lip again with a guilty expression.

"Don't getting paranoid, Wilson!" House said in the phone letting out a laugh "She's here with me!" He added, glancing at Cuddy.

"What do you mean with _what is she doing here_ , Wilson?" He said, rolling his eyes "You know... sun... tropical beach... _me_ " he said still listening to his friend's voice the other end of the line but glancing at Cuddy again and deliberately emphasizing that ' _me'_ , watching her as she bent her head to the side as she did every time he said something inappropriate.

"No" he laughed, slightly shaking his head "not _'me'_ like that _'she's doing me'_ " he laughed again at the look Cuddy gave him, opening her mouth slightly "Although..." he continued, glancing at her with a very mischievous look, failing to resist the temptation to make fun of her "actually... she hasn't been wearing panties since last night" he said, looking at Cuddy as her eyes widened even more eyes and hearing Wilson almost choking on the other end of the line. He knew him so well that he could almost _see_ him blushing even thousands of miles away.

Cuddy gave him a very dirty look as she literally tore off the phone from his hand.

House couldn't help but smile as he took a sip of hot chocolate from what had been Cuddy's cup and listened as she explained to Wilson that _'her panties were where they should be',_ then apologizing for having forgotten to call and advise him that she had decided to take a few relaxing days, as long as a week with House could be considered as 'relaxing', and that she would be back in a week.

"You're a jerk!" She said, staring at him and raising both eyebrows as she placed the phone on the table.

"You're a bad liar" he replied staring at her in turn.

Cuddy held his gaze for a few seconds before shaking her head and looking away, then passing near him and exiting the room. Clearly annoyed.

He leaned against the doorframe as he watched her taking her clothes from the bag, then disappearing behind the screen that separated their beds.

"Cuddy?" He said, lightly biting his lip in order not to smile, but without really succeeding in it.

"What do you want, House?" She said in an annoyed tone, without looking out "If you think I'll give you the satisfaction to prove that you're wrong, dream on!".

Of course she would have never given him the satisfaction to prove that he was wrong! But the funny thing was that... he was not at all convinced that he was wrong!

"You can come here or I'll come there myself" he said holding back another smile and watching her as she reluctantly went out from that screen.

Her head down like when she was very annoyed but didn't want to argue.

"What do you want, House?" She repeated with a sigh, then raised her head to look at him.

House didn't answer and she looked at him with an expression somewhere between an exasperated and a bored one while he went to his bed and took a bag from under it. He tossed it toward her and she caught it, then looking quizzically at him before looking at the contents of the bag, then looking up at him with a even more puzzled expression.

"For _me_?" She asked as her eyes opened wide.

"No, for Wilson" he replied watching as she bit her lip and smiled a half smile, nodding, looking at the contents of the bag and not at him.

"You bought me a...?" ... She smiled as she pulled out of that bag a pair of panties and a bra, then looking up at him with a questioning look.

Well... at least he hadn't brought her a micro leopard-print thong or, knowing House, _edible_ panties.

No lace. No... well ... studs or leather garnishes in sadomasochistic style to make fun of her. None of that. A simple black outfit.

"How...?"

 _... How did you know my size?_ those were the words that wanted to come out of her lips as she turned that bra in her hands ... But that _'how'_ was the only word that came out... the remainder of that question got lost, replaced in her mind by the memory of the sensation of his hand on her breasts... and of how her breast perfectly fit in his hand...

House just stared at her, running his tongue on his lips as his lips slightly curled into a half smile. Into a half _vaguely mischievous_ smile.

Cuddy held his gaze and couldn't help but smile in turn, nodding and bending her head slightly to the side while putting that bra back in the bag along with the panties.

"Why didn't you give me this last night?" She asked with a slightly mischievous smirk actually already foreseeing what the answer was.

"Because... _your panties were where they should be_ " he said looking straight into her eyes and watching her shaking her head, but this time still smiling, although she still bite her lip.

House continued to look at her. _Fuck._.. how could the mere thought that she was going to wear something that had been touched by his own hands be enough to trigger a reaction in his groin?!

"Since when do you have an obsession with my panties, House?" She said looking into his eyes, but letting out a laugh.

House looked at her and immediately rejected the first answer that appeared in his mind. _Since I have an obsession for you!_ He dismissed even the second one. _Since you don't wear them!_ And he realized that he was out of time to reply to her provocation.

He just watched her as she looked away and looking again at the contents of that paper bag. Who was he kidding? He had always had an obsession with her panties! And with her ass. And with her breasts. With every inch of her. Only that he had always tried to keep her at arm's length. One step forward and two steps back. Their game. In an endless _cat and mouse playing._ Yet the more they warded off each other the more they were pushed towards each other. Polar opposites. And the attraction between them was something that neither of them could control. The way she argued with him during their quarrelling was enough to turn him on. The way in which she placed her hands on her hips when she wanted to impose her authority turned him on. The way in which she just touched her neck as she talked on the phone turned him on.

 _Fuck!_ That woman could give him an erection just by responding to his puns...

He swallowed and shifted his gaze on her mouth before looking again at her eyes. Shit... the way she bit that damned lip... All he wanted right now was to bite that lip of hers. And suck it up to make her moan... and... _Fuck, Greg!_ He shook off that thought and swallowed again. Has he never been so attracted to someone he can actually feel it driving him insane?

He looked at her as she pulled out of that bag a pair of flip flops and a linen dress, then smiling again.

A simple blue linen dress. Short but not too short. Spaghetti straps. Light blue. Well... actually not light blue... _gray-blue..._

"Thanks..." she said smiling, this time looking up at him and just partially managing to hide the mix of embarrassment and amazement she felt for that very unexpected gesture. Definitely an out of character gesture. "Blue like _the ocean swept by Monsoons_? " She asked smiling, while a amused flash passed in her eyes and she raised both eyebrows, biting her lower lip completely.

"Like your eyes" he replied looking at her for a moment and in turn biting his lip slightly, then walking out of the room.


	9. Every time we touch

_Hello to everyone and thank you for all your warm feedback to the previous chapters! By now you all know that I get inspired by songs, right? Well, sometimes my taste in music surprises even myself 'cause actually I'm not a fan of this singer, but one morning, driving toward my work place and listening to the radio I bumped into a sort of revival of the summer greatest hits of the last ten years and I found myself thinking 'whoa, this fits with my fanfic!' (Even the time since it's a 2007 song) So here it is. Obviously I don't owe the songs in here and bla-bla-bla. I hope you'll enjoy._

 _..._

* * *

 **Chapter 9 - Every time we touch**

 **...**

"Remind me never enter again into one of these places with a woman with an American Express Platinum, Cuddy!" He said giving her an unconvincing scowl as he looked around among the shelves of the mall.

Cuddy smiled, placing on the shelf one of the tank top in her hand and taking another one.

"I didn't ask you to accompany me, House" she said, smiling "and I'm beginning to think that that Meningococcus gave _you_ some neurological damage" she added, letting out a half-laugh.

House shook his head.

"It's not about that Meningococcus. If I find your corpse left in a garbage dump, Wilson is going to kill me! "He said, turning away and looking at one of those bikinis on the hangers.

Cuddy nodded and smiled, still looking at him as he watched those bikinis one by one, unable to help smiling at the thought of how much he seemed out of place in that store. _How many women had he accompanied to have shopping in a mall?_ Certainly not his occasional women. Well, Stacy of course, but that was a long time ago... and before his leg.

"Buy this, Cuddy!" He said, looking at her with a very mischievous look.

A laugh burst from her lips as soon as she looked up.

"Sure!" She said, laughing "I really need a _full Brazilian_ for that one, House!" She laughed again, looking at him as he nodded in turn, watching that miniscule bikini and not her.

"Killjoy" He said glaring at her, although unable to prevent his lips from curling into a slight smile.

...

* * *

He sat on one of the two bamboo armchairs under the porch, savoring the evening breeze. Closed eyes and a beer in his hand as he took a sip from time to time directly from the bottle.

 _"Holy cow..."_

He suddenly opened his eyes to the sound of those two words pretty much stifled by Cuddy's labored breathing, and watched her.

Standing in front of him, leaning with one hand on the wooden stair handrail. Her other hand on her hip as she tried to catch her breath. Her hair tied in a ponytail from which a few curls had escaped sticking to her forehead. A pair of shorts that barely covered her bottom and a soaked tank top. House couldn't help but swallow while the trickle of sweat on her cleavage focused his gaze directly on the line between her breasts that then disappeared into the neckline of that top.

 _Fuck Greg, what are you? Fourteen?_ He said to himself, settling in that armchair as the tension in his groin grew immediately at that view. But... was there something sexiest than a sweaty and panting Lisa Cuddy? At that moment the only thing his brain could think about was how much he wanted to feel the taste of her skin on his tongue...

"Holy. Cow." she repeated again, enunciating those two words, this time laughing and shaking her head, distracting him from that thought.

She ran a hand over her face, moving the hair escaping from her ponytail and bending over, placing both hands on her knees, gasping for breath.

"You don't have the physique, Cuddy!" He said, laughing and teasing her.

"I'm... completely... out of training" she said, laughing and shaking her head "...I barely ran a few miles and I feel like that corpse in the garbage dump, House" she said meeting his gaze, still laughing.

He watched her laughing and took another sip of cold beer, trying to cool something more than his throat. Because _if that was a corpse, he had just found out he decidedly was a necrophiliac!_

He held back the urge to follow her with his eyes as she walked through the door, but looked at her again as she came back a few seconds later with a bottle of water in one hand, drinking a couple of sips and then resting it on the coffee table in front of him.

She moved with one hand one of the curls that fell over her forehead and then untied her ponytail, shaking her head slightly and letting her hair falling on her shoulders. She turned in her fingers the elastic band meeting House's eyes and literally reading in his eyes what had just appeared in his mind.

 _A black strapless dress. Her hair tied up in a sort of chignon, held in place only by the same pencil he had looked at for an entire semester. HIS hand taking off that pencil from her hair... He had watched her straight into the eyes as she slightly shook her head letting her hair fell on her shoulders._

 _Just like now._

She tied up her hair again into a tighter ponytail, biting her lip almost imperceptibly and looked away, turning to look at the ocean.

Yeah... _Just like now_. Only with a different ending this time...

"Plans for the evening?" He asked nonchalantly in the same tone he would have asked about the weather.

"Aside dying on the couch?" She asked smiling, turning her head to look at him "Honestly, I have no strength left even to take a shower, House." She said, shaking her head slightly. "You?"

House just shrugged.

"No plans" he replied looking at her for a moment and taking another sip of beer.

 _Yeah, no plans._ Why the hell couldn't he just ask her out!? It wasn't that difficult, right? _Hey, Cuddy, how about going for a drink?_ Why was he so afraid of a _no_? The worst that could happen to him was to drink alone for the umpteenth time! Which would still have happened if he wasn't going to ask her out! Only 8 words put together! And yet ... 8 words that his mind refused to put together!

...

* * *

He turned his glass of Scotch watching that amber liquid dancing into it. No ice. Maybe he should have taken it _on the rocks_ in that hot night refreshed only by an almost imperceptible breeze... but he had preferred not to water down those 40% alcoholic volume. Perhaps at least it would have clouded his mind just enough to make him stop repeatedly calling himself _a fucking idiot!_

"All alone tonight?" The barman had asked him putting in front of him a second drink.

House had simply looked up at him. The same guy of the previous night. And... well, he was a man! Obviously he remembered of _his wife_! It would be weird otherwise! But even if he hadn't been known to be a very unsociable guy, certainly making conversation was the last thing he wanted to do at that time. For more with that guy. He opened his mouth to answer with one of his sharp comment... something that took away from that guy the will to make comments at least for the rest of the week... but he didn't have the time to do that.

A Latin-featured brunette approached the counter and ordered a Cosmopolitan, focusing on herself the attention of both of them.

 _A Cosmopolitan_. Eight hundred drinks on the list and that woman had to ordered exactly a Cosmopolitan?! He looked at her out of the corner of his eye as she sat on the barstool next to his. Her hair tied in a braid and a red dress.

He couldn't tell if she flirted more with the barman or with him. What he knew for sure was that, from the way she laughed, she didn't stand alcohol very well. _As some he knew._

He watched as she had another joke with the barman, then turning her head again toward him and smiling. She flirted with him in a subtle and in a sense intriguing way, slightly biting her lip, in a way that reminded him inexorably of _someone._

And he was surprised by what he felt as he watched her.

"Do you think if I get drunk I'm not a good girl?" She asked him, laughing and taking a sip of her third drink.

"No" he answered almost snapping that _no_ from his lips, glancing at her and then watching his glass of Scotch before looking at her again "If you get drunk you _won't be_ a good girl" he said, raising an eyebrow as she nodded and ran her tongue on her lips.

"Well, you don't look like the _good-girl type of guy_ " she replied staring at him with a very _explicit_ look.

Yes, he was surprised by what he felt.

A beautiful woman. Long legs highlighted by that dress that barely covered her bottom. Probably Brazilian, because of her accent... _Caliente_ like all Latin women. Yeah, he was surprised by what he felt. Or rather... by what he didn't feel. No movement in his lower parts. How was it possible that that _damned_ woman had ruined him for all the other women!

A hand on his shoulder made him suddenly look up.

"Am I interrupting something, _honey_?" She said, raising an eyebrow, looking into his eyes and then glancing at the woman next to him, reaching out at the same time for the drink on the counter in front of him.

House looked at her as she took a sip of _his_ whiskey from his own glass, closing her eyes for a moment as alcohol burned her throat, then opening them again to look at him.

 _Fuck..._ she was...

The adjective ' _beautiful'_ didn't do her justice! Her hair partially up. Eye shadow, eye pencil and mascara emphasizing her eyes. _Fuck..._ he hadn't see her wearing makeup for a month and he realized it only now. Because the truth was that she was beautiful. Period. Even without makeup. With only her long dark lashes to emphasize the color of her eyes. But that dress... _Holy shit!_ How happened he didn't notice such a dress among the five hundred dresses she had tried that morning! It wrapped her body in a way that inexorably emphasized her curves while the skirt slightly ruffled in the night breeze. An Oriental motif. Blue, white, gold and brown mixed together in such a way that they enhanced the light tan of her skin after that sunny day. And... a plunging neckline. _Fuck, Cuddy... since when do you dislike wearing a bra?_

He swallowed.

"Where did you got that dress?" He asked, almost biting his tongue as soon as those words escaped his mouth. _What the hell...? Where the fuck did that ridiculous question come from?_

"Why? Don't you like it?" She simply replied, looking down at her own dress and then again up at him with a quizzical look, continuing to turn _his_ glass in her hands.

 _Don't I like it? Holy shit, Cuddy! Does the fact that I'd tear it off of you count as_ 'I like it' _?_

He didn't answered her question, looking for a joke with which regaining control over the situation. But his brain didn't cooperate. And probably because all his five liters of blood were suddenly channeled in one part of his body. And definitely it wasn't his _brain_!

"Never leave a wife and a credit card in the same room, Sir" the barman said, laughing, listening to a piece of their conversation and watching him and then the two women in front of him, shaking his head.

 _What the hell...? Even this guy now?_

He didn't replied, just giving him a half-scowl as he settled better on the barstool.

"Are you _resurrected_?" He asked trying to change the course of that speech "I know of a guy who succeeded once. Actually one of yours " he said, raising an eyebrow and looking at her as she watched the woman next to him standing up from the stool and walking away, gesturing a _bye_ to the barman.

She turned to him and smiled, then sitting down on that same barstool, settling her skirt although she couldn't prevent the dress tear to open up, exposing part of her thigh.

"It took me less than three days!" She said smiling, settling better on that stool and bending her head by side, just watching him for a moment before looking away, focusing on the barman, smiling and gesturing him to get her a drink.

House realized only then that they have been working together for almost ten years but they had never been together in a place that was not the hospital's cafeteria. But... it was not so bad chatting with her. Sure, it would be easier if they could finally lower their usual defensive barriers! Not turning around each other like a tiger which studies its prey and not getting defensive like that same prey, expecting to be devoured at any moment. Was it really so hard to let himself go? Was it so _dangerous_?

The truth was that he wanted to let himself go. But he didn't like changes... and letting himself go would have changed things between them definitely.

His gaze focused on her fingers, lightly touching the rim of the glass, as she watched the people that in the meantime had filled the dance floor in front of the counter top, as the notes of a song turned into the ones of the next song. If he wasn't who he was, he would have asked her to dance. But... well... he was who he was ...

He continued to watch her as she slightly moved her head to the music without looking away from the people dancing in front of her, meeting from time to time the gaze of the guy who had been staring at her now for at least ten minutes, a few feet away.

"Look who's back!" He said, nodding toward that guy, watching her as she instead turned her head toward him, meeting his gaze "By the way that Marco is looking at you, Cuddy, he's dying to dance with you!"

Cuddy smiled and shook her head.

"Dance?" She repeated, unable to keep from laughing at the mischievous look that appeared in House's eyes "I'm not sure he wants _to dance_ , House!" She said looking at him with the same look and taking a sip of her drink, then looking back to the dance floor.

"I thought you liked _dancing_ , Cuddy" he said pointing out that ' _dancing'_ in a somewhat too naughty way and watching her as she ran her tongue on her lips and then turned to look at him straight in the eye, with the same look she usually gave him every time he said something very inappropriate.

"Sure. He can't compete with me!. But _dancing_ with him is better than nothing, right?" He said still teasing her while she sighed and then rolled her eyes.

Even if she'd have had a little doubt, the way he looked at her didn't leave her none about which kind of _dancing_ was he referring to.

"It ache all over, House. I don't think he wants to dance with a corpse..." she said, ignoring his provocation and instead smiling slightly, trying to change the subject of that conversation.

House looked at her raising both eyebrows.

"I don't know what's your idea of _a corpse_ , but I have the impression that you attended a more _interesting_ pathological anatomy class than me" he ironically said looking into her eyes and letting out a half laugh.

He met her eyes while she weighed up that answer, slightly swinging her head in what was a sort of yes and of no at the same time, then failing to suppress a half smile, slightly biting her lip to which, in House's language, was a compliment. Neither of them spoke. The silence between them filled only by the first notes of yet another song.

"Hhhmmm ... I like this version of this song" Cuddy said, almost to herself, looking at her own drink and taking another sip.

Again she couldn't help but bite her lip, even if only subtly, to that _'I still feel your touch in my dreams...'_ and she met House's eyes while the corners of his mouth curled slightly in what might have become a smile. He inhaled, slightly opening his mouth as to say something, but closing it again just a moment later. He looked away for just a fraction of a second before looking at her again with a completely different look. The one she knew all too well.

"It doesn't point out in what _kind_ of dreams" he said with a mischievous smile, looking at her straight in the eye "In _my dreams_ , yours is what makes me..."

The glare she gave him silenced him instantly.

"Just finish that sentence, House, and I swear that the only thing you're going to dream is an urologist's phone number!" She said, looking into her eyes and then turning to look back at the dance floor.

House looked at her, unable to hold back a smile.

"Come on, Cuddy!" He said, laughing, "In a way, it was a compliment!"

"The compliment of a pervert!" She replied without looking at him, though he could tell to see the corners of her mouth curving almost imperceptibly.

 _Beautiful._ That was really the only word that came to his mind. _Beautiful_ when she laughed. _Beautiful_ when she bit that damned lip of hers holding his gaze. _Beautiful_ when she was mad at him _. Beautiful_ when... she pretended to be mad at him. He continued to look at her and he knew that she knew he was watching her. He knew she could feel his eyes on her even if she pretended to look at those couples moving embraced, into the music, on the notes of that ' _Every time we touch'_ that would probably rose to the top hit of that summer and then perhaps disappear into oblivion a few months after. A much slower version of the original one. One of the many love songs sung by an all-boobs-and-ass blonde... Not his kind of music! The same refrain repeated endlessly. And that ... _'everything we touch I get this feeling'_ that turned in his mind although he tried to think of something else. Because, as he tried, _she_ was the only thing he could think about. And perhaps he simply just had to stop thinking.

If that hand hadn't been his he wouldn't have believed it. If he had thought before doing that, he wouldn't. But he didn't think. His hand took the glass from hers and pulled her on the dancing floor without giving her time to reply and practically dragging her there as her _'House'_ got lost among the notes of that song. And again among the words of that same song.

 _... I want this to last ... need you by my side ..._

His hands found her waist gently drawing her to him, leaving only a few inches between their bodies. Close to each other as they weren't for too long... but not that close. Cuddy realized she had been holding her breath only as soon as her lungs demanded air and she rested in turn her hands on his shoulders then making them slip along them and behind his neck, holding back the urge to run her fingers through his hair.

 _God..._ the last time she had been with House on a dance floor had been... _when?_ ... Certainly not to the dozens of charity galas of the hospital! ... If he went there (and it was mandatory to add that 'if') he stood at most somewhere, leaning against a wall or a counter top with a glass in one hand... so... the last time was... _that time_...

 _... can't you feel my heart beat so, I can't let you go... want you in my life..._

"So... what is this, House?" She asked, raising an eyebrow, looking at him straight in the eye and lightly biting her lip as she held back a smile.

"Dancing, _Miss SingleBallroomDanceLovers-dot-com_ " he replied smiling slightly and continuing to look into her eyes as she shook her head, smiling on that _'the bad and the good one we've got through them all'..._

He wished her scent was not so intoxicating. It was even when she didn't use any, but _her_ scent mixed to that perfume was absolutely extraordinary. _Jasmine and spices_. It was soft and sensual... like her...

He swallowed, trying to focus on something different than the woman in his arms. Because the beat of his heart wasn't the only thing he didn't want to get her aware of.

His hand slightly loosened his grip on her waist and Cuddy looked into his eyes. _Was he uncomfortable?_ Knowing him he was probably already regretting that gesture. Maybe... not about that gesture in itself, but certainly the impact that the gesture could have. They stared at each other, reading each other's discomfort... but neither of them would have admitted that. _Did he really want to step back?_ Because what she wanted at that moment was instead exactly that. His arms around her body. Because...

 _... 'cause everytime we touch I get this feeling..._

Yeah... because every time they touched she get that feeling ... something she couldn't describe...

And him too.

 _... I want this to last... need you by my side..._

He focused on the music. The notes of a piano. Chords he could play by ear even without watching the arrangement. And he met her gaze on the last note of that song.

Close. So close. He could feel the warmth of her body even though it wasn't pressed against his. He could feel her breathing and she could feel his. Her gaze lost in his.

He bowed his head slightly toward her while some electronic notes unexpectedly replaced the previous soft ones. The same chords of a few seconds earlier... and again that "... _'cause every time we touch"_ , but a completely different rhythm, stressed by the bass hammering in his ears in the decidedly now hands-up version.

They continued to stare at each other, but a laugh simultaneously escaped from the lips of both of them at that sudden change of atmosphere. He felt Cuddy's arms leave his neck and let in turn go of his grip on her waist, watching her as she slightly moved her head and hips to the music.

"Quite a bit too much movement for my leg, Cuddy!" He said, laughing as he watched her, his lips moving closer to her ear so she could hear him despite the several decibels.

The look he found in her eyes wasn't the one he expected.

"I thought _your leg_ could keep up with me, House!" She practically screamed in his ear so he could hear her, then looking at him with a mischievous look that didn't leave him any doubt about which _leg_ that two-way was referring to.

He smiled, holding her gaze and running his tongue on his lips. _How much he liked that side of her!_ How she was able to stand up to him, returning his jokes and teasing him as he did with her.

And if he knew that a single drink had that effect on her, he would have offered her a drink time ago! He continued to watch her dance. Sexy and beautiful, while swaying her hips to the music. A Lisa Cuddy he didn't believe still existed.

And again that _... 'I can't let you go ... want you in my life'_ ... this time almost _screamed_ by the rhythm of the music while even that song ended, giving way to an equally hands-up _"Because the night "._

And he met Cuddy's look on the first words of that song.

 _Take me now, baby,_

 _Here as I'm_

 _Hold me close, try and understand..._

They stared at each other.

 _Holy Shit, Lisa! Can you really sway your hips in front of him on this 'take me now, baby'?_

"Fine" she said, raising a hand and letting out a laugh, still looking into his eyes "I'm not drunk enough for that" she said, laughing again and then looking away as he laughed in turn.

"Does that mean _that you could be_?" He asked again with a mischievous smile as of course she rolled her eyes, however, continuing to smile, then turning and walking toward what was her barstool a few minutes before.

House followed her, gently biting his lip and rubbing his chin as he smiled, watching the sway of her hips. Because... well, _fuck_ , all what he wanted right now was _to take her now, here as she was and held her close_! And there was nothing to understand! Too bad that he didn't have the guts to let himself go _and try._

He shook his head on the notes of that _'can't hurt you now', can't hurt you now, can't hurt you now'._

Since when it seemed that even the most banal lyrics was a message for him? Too bad, again, that it was just what held him back. The fear of being hurt. And of hurting her. Because this was him. He hurt people before they could hurt him. Because that was. And the few times in which he had trusted in someone he had been hurt more. Hurt and betrayed. By his father. By Stacy. He knew he had a bad temper and he certainly didn't blame them for who he was. He blamed them for having made him harder and more diffident than he already was by nature. And yet ... he wanted to be able to trust in her...

He sat down beside her, watching her as she drummed her fingers on the glass to the music. If he didn't know her well he would tell that she was simply drumming her fingers on her glass to the music. But he knew her well. He could almost _hear_ the sound of her thoughts, despite the many decibels of the music still sounding around them. The way in which she stared at her drink without looking at him was a clear sign that she was actually analyzing what had happened between them, and valuing how to respond to that move. She was wondering why he had done that. If again he just wanted to make fun of her. He knew that she was wondering about _what he wanted_. What he couldn't tell was _what she wanted_! Because as far as he knew her, that woman still was an enigma.

He took a sip of his whiskey and met her gaze for a moment before she looked again at what was left of her drink finishing it in one long swallow almost like it was just mineral water instead than a cocktail with at least 15 % of alcohol by volume. Was she trying to ease her nerves?

"I'm not going to carry you to bed, Cuddy!" He said, staring at her as she turned her head to look at him, meeting his gaze again.

"What?" She asked with a very quizzical look.

"If you get drunk, I'll have to leave you here to sober" he said, looking at her with a more serious look than she would have expected as she stared back at him with a look in turn halfway between a serious and a questioning one.

"I had a couple of boozes, House. I'm not drunk" She said, looking straight into his eyes.

House held her gaze.

"You probably drank in two days more than you usually drink in six months. Your highest night hoot is a herbal tea, Cuddy! 0,5 oz of alcohol per booze is 1 oz in less than half an hour. That it wouldn't be so bad if you were a 200 lb man who marinates his liver into alcohol every night. But not for a 110 lb woman who, according to my intuition, is also empty-stomached. At most you ate... what? A few crackers a few hours ago?"

Cuddy held his gaze, though slightly biting her lip.

"A mango bowl" she said looking into his eyes, unable to prevent the corners of her mouth from curling slightly into the hint of a smile at the way in which sometimes he was able to analyze her as she was one of his puzzle.

"Yeah, sure! Sorry!" He said while in turn he held back a smile "No carbohydrates" he said, looking at her and this time smiling, looking away and shaking his head slightly.

"Are you caring about me, House?" She asked, looking up and meeting the blue of his eyes "Because... you know, I'm beginning to be worried..." She added, looking at him with a slightly mischievous look.

"I'm caring about _myself,_ Cuddy! As feminist as you are, your liver enzymes metabolize alcohol in twice as long than a man's ones... so... I'd like to avoid having to went back to our room with a 110 pounds deadweight"

Cuddy glared at him and shook her head slightly, but again unable to hold back a smile.

"Want me walking on a line or me touching the tip of my nose with a finger, House?" She asked, standing up.

The world spun for a millisecond, but she didn't get perturbed and continued to look at him. _God! How could he always be right ?!_ She wasn't drunk, but by the _lightness_ of her head she had drunk too much for someone not used to drink.

"Does it spin?" House said pointing to her head, letting out a half-laugh, looking at her with a look that was clearly an _'I told you!'_

She didn't answer but laughed in turn.

"I hate you" she said, looking at him and shaking her head.

House held her gaze and licked his lips, standing up in turn.

"I know" he replied, smiling slightly in turn as they looked into each other's eyes. Again blue lost in the blue.

...

* * *

"Do you need a hand to get out of that dress?" He asked with a very mischievous look, raising an eyebrow, looking at her as she took off her sandals.

"I'm not that drunk, House" She repeated, looking at him straight in the eye and then rolling her eyes to the gaze in his eyes "And _no_ , definitely not enough for that _'take me now, here as I am'_ , House!" She added, glaring at him.

"You weren't so boring!" He said, staring at her and shaking his head slightly, letting out a laugh "I liked you more twenty years ago."

A laugh that she didn't return. She held his gaze while that smile disappeared from his lips.

 _God, Lisa, you're such a stupid! What did you expect? Sex. That's what he wants and... what he always wanted. Did you really think that he was going to...?_

She sighed and lightly bit her lip, looking away for a moment and then looking up at him, finding her composure again.

"One of us grew up, House!" She said with a look that could have frozen him despite those 100°F.

If he hadn't been himself he could have tried to save the night apologizing for the interpretation that could be given to his words, but... well, it was himself.

"A part of me has certainly grown now, Cuddy!" He said with a very mischievous look to which she replied with a loud sigh, before turning, giving him her back as she took her pajamas from the drawer.

House looked at her shoulders and, well, of course at her ass, biting his lip in turn and holding back a smile. _God, he liked so much to annoy her!_ _Had she a vague idea of how much sexy she was when she got mad?_

"With all those gala charity of yours, I thought you were more charitable, Cuddy!" He said looking at her back as her shoulders lowered slightly as every time he said something very irritating.

"What the hell are you talking about, House?" She said, turning her head to look at him, her pajamas in one hand and House's T-shirt from the night before in the other one.

"I'm saying that you should give _a hand_ to... someone who need it..." he said, staring at her with a very explicit look.

Cuddy sighed again, but was unable to prevent the corners of her mouth from curling into what looked like a sort of half smile to the way in which he was watching her. _So annoying and yet so..._

She shook her head.

"You already have one, House!" She said tossing his shirt to him and looking at him as he opened his mouth to retort with another joke. Probably something like _'yours is better'._

But she gave him no time to do that. Her hand on his mouth stopped those words in his throat. Her fingers against his lips. And they looked into each other's eyes to that contact...

 _...'Cause every time we touch I get this feeling ..._

"Goodnight, House" she said, smiling slightly, still staring at him, removing her hand from his mouth and resting that same hand on his arm, just for a moment.

"Goodnight, Cuddy" he replied, still looking at her while she looked away, following her with his eyes until she disappeared behind the bathroom door.

He looked at his own arm, at the exact spot where her hand had touched him, unable not to think about how those same hands had been around his neck just less than an hour before on the notes of that song...

 _'I still feel your touch in my dreams' ..._

 _'Goodnight, Cuddy'_ he repeated to himself as that song resonated in his head along with the feeling of her body close to his.

 _...'can't let you go'... need you in my life..._

* * *

 ** _Author's note:_** _Just in case you want to listen to the songs, they are Cascada's 'Every time we touch' (in the slow version and then in the original hands-up version) and "Because the Night" (here again in Cascada's version)_


	10. Ice

_Hello to everyone. Just a note before leaving you to the story... I know a part of this chapter is not very original (did I use it practically in all my stories?)... but it fit in here, so I couldn't help! Enjoy!_

* * *

 **Chapter10 - Ice**

 **...**

* * *

The next morning the sun was already high in the sky when House opened his eyes. Cuddy had already left. For the beach. Or maybe for another running. Who could know? She had left no message. No post-it. Well, not that he expected her to. She was free to do whatever she wanted without accounting to anyone. Nor to him.

He prepared a coffee directly from the coffee maker on the kitchen furniture. There was no cup in the sink, nor an empty tray from room service. Which meant that she had gone out without having breakfast. Perhaps she had simply opted for breakfast at the coffee bar...

The sound of the opening door distracted him from that thought and he looked at her. Panting and sweaty, just a little less than the previous day, probably for the fresh morning air. The same curls escaping from her ponytail. A pair of shorts and a lime-colored tank top. Earbuds in her ears as he could feel the buzz of the bass coming from the iPod clipped to her shorts. She untied her hair as soon as she entered the door, holding the rubber band between her teeth as she tied her hair back in a tight ponytail. Eyes closed. She took a few steps into the room and just then she saw him, leaning on the kitchen furniture on the opposite side of the room, holding a cup of coffee in his hands.

She jumped slightly and quickly took off the earphones from her ears.

"God, I didn't see you!" She said smiling slightly and putting a hand on her chest.

House looked at her, but didn't smile, and she held his gaze with a puzzled look on her face.

"Did you go for a running without breakfast?" He asked, looking into her eyes.

"I had some fruit, _Mr. Healthy-diet-Controller_ " she replied, nodding toward the basket on the furniture next to him, with the same gaze.

House didn't answer and just looked at her as she took a bottle of water from the fridge then drinking right from the bottle. And he continued to watch her as the expression on her face turned into a grimace and she bit her lip, stifling a _"shit!"_ and suddenly putting a hand on her calf as a painful spasm ran suddenly from that muscle down to her foot. He rolled his eyes, then approaching her and helping her to limp to the couch.

"This time it's two good legs in two. It's already an improvement" he said as a slight smile appeared on her lips.

He gave her no time to say anything as soon as she sat down on the couch. He took her leg and took off her shoe dropping it loudly on the floor unconcerned about her _"House, don't..."_ , then holding the sole of her foot in his palm and bending her fingers.

Cuddy held her breath and tilted her head back, resting her back on the couch as for a few seconds that move sharpened her pain more before it began slowly to fade. She let him massaging her calf with both hands, again bending her toes toward the forefoot and then her foot towards the leg to loosen the cramp.

"I can tell that _' some fruit'_ didn't include a banana" he said, looking at her again, this time with a clear look of reproach.

Cuddy opened her eyes and bit her lip slightly.

"You got this at your _Healthy-diet Controller class_ first lesson?" She asked him with a half smile, looking at his lips slightly curling.

...

* * *

Sun, white sand and sea. What could he want more than the feeling of his skin warmed by the sun and caressed by a warm breeze at the same time?

Sun which suddenly darkened as in a solar eclipse.

"Cuddy!" He said in an exasperated tone, opening one eye to look at her despite the blinding sun would make almost impossible to keep his eyes opened "I know you think you're a _sunshine_... but you're disturbing my tan!"

She didn't reply and just looked at him without moving an inch as House snorted loudly.

"I always wanted to have you tattooed on my chest!" He said sarcastically, looking at her again just with one eye but leaning a hand on his forehead to have some shade.

"The only thing you'll have on your chest is a sunburn, House!" She said, looking at him with the same serious expression she'd use with a 5-years-old child "You're not getting a tan, you're roasting!"

House looked at her with a raised eyebrow, then sitting up, leaning on his elbows.

"What?" He asked with a mischievous look "Want smear sunscreen on my muscles, Cuddy?"

"No," she replied, looking seriously at him, and again like she was looking at a child "I want to avoid seeing you peeling like a molting snake, House"

He looked at her again, however, rolling his eyes, taking the sunscreen bottle from her bag and pouring almost half of it in the palm of his hand before beginning to rub it on his chest with both hands, then smearing it on his shoulders and on the part of his back he could reach.

 _God!_ Of course she wanted to rub that sunscreen on him! ... but she wasn't going to admit it, nor even under torture.

"Am I a good kid, _Mommy_?" He asked making fun of her, with the same voice that 5-years-old child would have had, watching as she nodded.

 _Fuck!_ That bikini on her was easy on the eyes! _She_ inside that bikini was easy on the eyes!

He couldn't help but watching her as in turn she rubbed some sunscreen on her belly, then moving up on her cleavage and neck and shoulders. And yet he looked at her hands as she rubbed that lotion on her back.

"Are you going to ask me, Cuddy? Possibly before your skin starts to peel off from the middle part of your back!" He said looking at her with the same look she had given him just before.

He watched as she bent her head to the side and rolled her eyes, just whispering a _'fine'_ as she handed him the bottle. He looked at her again as she lay down on her stomach on the beach bed. _God!_ In that position he had a perfect view of her ass.

The touch of his hand on her skin made her hold her breath for a moment. She thanked being on her stomach so he couldn't see her face... even though she was fully aware of how his eyes were focused now on a much lower part of her body than her face.

He undid her bra expecting to see her suddenly lift her head, turning to face him. But she didn't. And this anomaly in her behavior made him smile to himself. _Are you just letting me rub sunscreen on you, Cuddy? Or are you deliberately letting me to caress you?_ Obviously he had a vague idea of the answer, but he had evidence of it as soon as she let his fingers slip under the elastic band of her bikini panties. Only a few millimeters, but enough to be a clear answer to his question. He could almost swear he saw her shiver, though almost imperceptibly, to that contact.

"The sun doesn't shine there, House!" She said, this time lifting her head and turning to glare at him, slapping his hand, however, holding back a smile as she watched him, sitting up at the same time and clasping her bra again in one simple gesture.

House looked at her hands and then at her eyes, moistening his lips with his tongue and raising an eyebrow, then just lying down again on his bed, in turn _on his stomach._

...

* * *

The lightning lit up the sky over the palms, accompanied by the roar of a thunder and the sound of the wind whistling through the palm leaves.

Cuddy sat on the bamboo armchair under the porch and wrapped her shawl tighter around her body as she looked at the waves shattering on the beach. Actually she couldn't really see the ocean. She could hear it. The sound of the waves crashing on the beach. She could see it only from time to time, when the sky was lit by lightning and the same light mirrored on the dark water.

There was something fascinating in the air preceding a thunderstorm. It was exciting and at the same time disquieting. It could give her a feeling of fear and peace at the same time. A continuous contradiction. More or less like her relationship with House.

She liked the smell of the first rain drops on the leaves. She had always liked it. Since she was just a child.

She stayed still even when the rain began to fall harder in big drops beating on the wooden roof of the porch.

She looked up, as if to be sure that the rain couldn't seep through the wooden ceiling, and then again in front of herself, at the falling rain. She didn't move even when the light faded and then suddenly everything became dark. She stayed still for a moment, but, no... she didn't like the full darkness.

"House?" She called, opening the door.

She heard the sound of another door opening. Probably the bathroom one.

"Stay where you are, Cuddy" his voice said, from somewhere in the dark.

There were some candles. She was sure she saw some somewhere. And there was certainly a lighter in the kitchen. She made a few steps into the room, trying to orient herself in the darkness and...

"Holy shit, House!" She exclaimed as soon as he grabbed her arm, preventing her from bumping against him. "Where...? Where are you?" She said reaching for him, but finding only air in front of herself as he instead took also her other arm, then pulling her slightly towards himself.

The light suddenly went back illuminating the room. And he couldn't help but notice the flash in her eyes as soon as she found him practically naked in front of herself. Well, _almost_ naked.

"You're out of luck, Cuddy!" He laughed fixing better his towel around his waist, then looking at her with a mischievous look running a hand through his wet hair.

She held his gaze with an equally mischievous look.

"Do you think _yours_ is different from the other ones?" She asked with the hint of a smile, raising an eyebrow and using once again one of his jokes against him.

" _Different_ is not the adjective people usually attribute to it, Cuddy" he said looking at her with an even more mischievous look running his tongue on his lips "And you should know it..." he said looking into her eyes with the same look.

 _Shit!_ No, _'different'_ was definitely not the first adjective that came to her mind! She slightly bit her lip, but let go of it as soon as his gaze went from her eyes to her lips. And she swallowed, restraining the urge to run her tongue on her lips. Of course she knew! At times it seemed he could read her mind. And if he could ... she definitely hoped that he couldn't right now... Because at that moment her mouth craved _him_ as an oasis in the desert ... _God, Lisa, please!_ She had never been the kind of woman who fell on her knees in front of men. In both the ways of that two-way. But the image that appeared in her mind, as clear as twenty years ago, suddenly made the muscles of her most intimate part to contract in anticipation. And she swallowed again.

She shook off the image that appeared in her mind, and thanked that he couldn't feel the reaction of her body at that moment. How was it possible that a man could unleash certain thoughts in her?

"Better look for some candles, House" she said smiling slightly and looking at him as he smiled in turn looking into her eyes.

Five minutes later they both sat on the couch. Cuddy with her legs crossed in a sort of lotus position, House on the opposite side of the couch, leaning with his back to the backrest and his legs stretched in front of him. He had got dressed and wore now a shirt and a pair of shorts. Going out was definitely impossible because of the weather, since water fell in bucketfuls from the sky.

The light in the room faded again and the TV in front of them turned off.

"It's nerve-racking" he said looking at the light bulb and then at her, whom just smiled, shrugging as if to say _'there's nothing we can do about it'_. They could both hear the rain pounding on the roof and on the windows and, from time to time, the sound of thunders.

She watched as he stood up and lit a couple of candles before turning off the light switch.

The light of the candles trembled, sending shadows on the walls.

"Séance session?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, no way!" She replied, shaking her head and looking at him as he slightly smiled and sat down on the couch again "And... since when do you believe in ghosts?" She asked, raising an eyebrow in turn.

"I don't" he said with a mischievous look running his tongue on his lips "But as a 14-years-old it was the only way to have a girl wrapped to me" he added, letting out a laugh.

Cuddy smiled, running her tongue on her lips and House held her gaze.

"Since you're more than 40 you have to find something better, House" she said, smiling and shaking her head slightly looking at him as he tilted his head by side and stared at her again, without responding to that challenge.

"Truth or Dare?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No" She replied, shaking her head.

"Do you have some shameful secrets, Cuddy?" He asked, raising an eyebrow "Like... that you slept with a friend of your father?" He said seeing her eyes wide open.

"I'm going to kill Wilson!" She said, shaking her head and looking away from him "What else did he tell you?" She asked, looking up and biting her lip almost imperceptibly.

"Except that you touch yourself thinking about me?" He said, raising an eyebrow and looking at her as she opened her mouth again.

She closed her mouth and her lips curved into a half smile as she sat better on the couch and pointed at him.

"Certainly this wasn't told you by Wilson" she said, shaking her head and staring at him "And... dream on, House!" She said teasingly, running her tongue on her lips.

House held her gaze, letting even the corners of his mouth curling in a half smile.

"The fact I didn't got that from Wilson doesn't mean it's not true" he replied still looking at her with the same look.

She didn't answer and simply held his gaze. He certainly didn't expect her answering to a question like that, did him?

"That's why I'm not going to play this game with you" she said looking into his eyes.

"C'mon, ask me something! A warm-up round of _Truths_ " he said, nodding as to incite her to ask him something "C'mon, something personal if you want. Childhood. Love. Whatever you want. Dig into my soul!" He said in a theatrical intonation, then making a gesture of incitement with his hand "You already know I touch myself thinking about you!" He said, looking straight into her eyes and letting out a laugh as a laugh escaped even from Cuddy's lips.

"Fine" she said, running her tongue on her lips again and looking away while she thought about what question to ask him. How many other possibilities she would have had to ask him something personal "Um... about your leg" she said, slightly biting her lip "Will you never stop to be mad at me for not respecting your choice?"

House looked at her and rolled his eyes.

"How can you feel guilty about something like that, Cuddy ?!" He said, watching her as she bit her lip more "You were not the one who had to respect that choice"

 _Really?_ During all those years she had been thinking that he blamed her for his disability? Why the hell had she never asked him about that? _Oh, yeah... they never talked about anything personal..._

"Why do you feel guilty?" He asked, using his turn for a question.

"Because ... I was the one who suggested that kind of intervention to Stacy, House. She would have never thought about it if it wasn't because of me, so..."

"Your job was trying to save your patient. And that's what you did. She was the one who had to respect my will. She was my girlfriend. You were my doctor. You has nothing to do with that... even if you think that maybe, in her place, you would have made the same choice"

Cuddy didn't answer but looked away, nodding and shaking her head at the same time as if to say _'maybe yes, maybe no'_

"Have you ever experienced a moment... in which you thought you had never been so scared in all your life?" She asked still slightly biting her lip.

"Yes" he said looking into her eyes "... 36 days ago" he pointed out, then looking away.

 _36 days ago ..._ the flight from Singapore ... Scared for himself? Or scared for her? She couldn't help but smile slightly. The way he looked away was much more than an answer.

"You?" He asked in turn.

He watched her as she nodded, though hesitating before answering. _Your cardiac arrest before your leg surgery._ She looked down for a moment as if uncertain whether to answer or not. That was why she knew she would have made exactly the same choice of Stacy. Not a hypothesis. A certainty. She would have never allowed him to risk his life. But speaking of House... well, she had a lot to choose from. _His Vicodin overdose less than six months earlier. His gunshot wound..._

A lightning lit up the room followed by a so strong thunder that the windows rattled and they both startled, being distracted from the intimacy of that moment.

"Here!" He laughed "Your new scariest moment!" He added, playing down the way that night was taking.

"Fine, Cuddy! Enough psychological analysis. _Dare_. Go" He said, laughing.

Her stomach growled loudly and she put a hand on her stomach, laughing.

"Geez, Cuddy!" He said glancing at her "How long aren't you eating?" He said, looking at her as she smiled.

"... er... since this morning?" She said, biting her lip and looking at him as he rolled his eyes "Well," she added, sitting better on the couch "Since I can use you for a dare... give me something to eat" she said, smiling.

House stared at her and stood up. And the flash she saw in his eyes made her immediately rectify her words.

"Nothing ... _sexual_ , House" she pointed out looking into his eyes, thinking back about that _dare_ , and about the interpretations that could be given to her words. _Shit,_ she was playing _with House_! And with him nothing could be taken for granted. Why the hell had she said _'give me'_ and not _'bring me'_... "No physical contact" she said aloud so that he could hear her from the kitchen.

House came back a minute later with a basket of which she couldn't see the content. And a blindfold. Cuddy glared at him with what was clearly a _no-way-House_ look as she opened her mouth to speak.

"You said ... ' _give me_ _something to eat'_. You didn't point out _how_ " he said looking at her with a look that was a mix of mischief and fun, again meeting her slightly annoyed look "I won't touch you, I promise" he said, staring at her as she stared back at him, then whispering an uncertain _'ok'._

He blindfolded her and made her rest her back against the couch backrest so that she could slightly tilt her head back.

"Open your mouth" he said.

She hesitated and House couldn't help but laugh.

"C'mon! Do you really think I'd do something you don't want? It's just food. C'mon, Cuddy! Open - your- mouth" He repeated stressing every word and watching her as she smiled, running her tongue on her lips, whispering another _ok_ while she slightly opened her mouth.

He didn't put anything between her lips. He just touch her lips with something cold, smooth and moist, lingering on her lower lip.

She licked her lip lightly. It was sweet but slightly tart. What was it? Mango?

House put again that bite near her mouth, again without pushing it through her lips, but just touching them with it. This time he didn't pull it back but he let the juice dripping on her tongue forcing her to close her lips and instinctively sucking it.

He couldn't help but laugh as a _"Shit, House"_ escaped from her lips, and she brought a hand to her mouth, then sucking in that slice and finally savoring that sweet, juicy fruit.

He had promised not to touch her and, well, he hadn't touched her... but... _holy shit_... that was everything but _'non-sexual'_ ... and _God!_ ... she liked it...

He gave her time to swallow that piece of mango before putting something else close to her lips. Probably another fruit. It was cold as the first one, and velvety, but not as juicy as that one.

She recognized it as soon as he pushed it slightly into her mouth.

 _Holy shit!_

Again she couldn't help but laugh.

"My potassium source, _Mr._ _healthy-diet controller_?" She said, laughing as soon as that fruit touched her tongue.

 _Holy shit, House!_

House smiled as soon as he pushed that fruit into her mouth, but the smile on his face turned into pure devotion when, rather than bite into it, she slowly closed her lips, lingering on the tip of the fruit and simply savoring its taste on the tongue before really take a bite.

 _Fuck!_ He was as turned on as if she had reserved that treatment to him instead of to that banana. And at the bare thought of having had the same effect on her he felt an unmistakable throb against the zipper of his pants... He couldn't see her eyes, and the soft light of the candles wasn't enough for him to be able to catch a hint of blush on her cheeks. With the kind of bra she wore he couldn't even see her hard nipples through the fabric of the shirt... but the way in which she had pressed her thighs together... that was his answer...

House swallowed and returned to reality just at the moment when her laughter filled the room again.

He put another thing near lips, this time whispering a _"the last one, Cuddy."_ She immediately recognized that fruit. From the hard and rough surface that touched her lower lip. Coconut. Coconut milk to be exact.

She felt the cool liquid pour slowly into her mouth ... but she knew he wouldn't resist the temptation to do it... He let the liquid pour into her mouth faster than she could swallow, as part of it dripped from one of the corners of her mouth.

Cuddy closed her mouth trying to prevent that liquid from dripping down her cheek and neck, but succeeded just partially.

"C'mon, Cuddy, swallow!" He said unable to keep from laughing at the way she laughed, trying not to choke.

 _Shit! None told me that, House!_

She laughed, instinctively putting a hand over her mouth but failing to prevent that liquid from dripping again from her mouth. _Do you think I can't do it, House?_ She would have wanted to reply. But she didn't respond to that provocation and simply swallowed, then running her tongue on her lips.

 _Holy shit,_ they hadn't even touched each other and _... Fuck, Greg!_ All he wanted right now was bending over her and clean her mouth and neck... just using his tongue.

He watched her as she took off the blindfold and wiped her mouth with her hand, glaring at him with a look somewhere between amused and annoyed.

"You're a pig!" She said, pointing to him as she stood up, unable to hold back a laugh.

He simply replied with a look, holding her gaze but failing not to smile, then watching her as she went into the kitchen, returning a minute later with a sandwich and a glass of water and ice.

"Ok, Cuddy! My turn. Truth or Dare?" He said, looking at her as she sat down on the couch, again cross-legged.

"Truth, House. I don't trust your _dares_ anymore" she said glaring at him.

"Have you ever had sex with a woman?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

She laughed and shook her head.

"No" she replied, taking a bite of her sandwich.

House looked at her with a mischievous look and Cuddy rolled her eyes. _Why men always had fantasies about sex among women?_

"What about you, House?" She asked, taking another bite of her sandwich.

"I had sex with more than one woman, Cuddy!" He replied looking at her as she rolled her eyes again.

"Not with a woman, you idiot! With a man. Have you ever had sex with a man?" She asked with a sly grin still looking into his eyes and taking a sip of water from the glass.

"Yup" he replied, staring at her.

Cuddy nearly choked in her glass of water.

"W-what...? Really?" She asked as her eyes opened wide.

House couldn't help but smile at the expression on her face, then running his tongue on his lips.

"I thought you have a open mind, Cuddy" he said, shaking his head and still staring at her.

"I... I have..." she hesitated "I just... I don't..."

House bit his lip to keep from laughing. He would have paid to be able to read her thoughts at that moment. She certainly was wondering how happened she didn't noticed and if... if it happened when he was young or if... if his friendship with Wilson was something more than a friendship... actually many people had probably wondered about that ... Anyway... whatever she was thinking about, he had left her speechless.

"Have I found a way to shut you up?" He teasingly asked her.

"No..." she answered "Sorry... it's just... really House, I just didn't think..."

This time, a laugh escaped from his mouth and she looked at him with a questioning look.

"Are you making a fool of me?" She asked, looking into his eyes.

"No, Cuddy, I'm not" he said holding her gaze "I had sex with a man. The last time was..."

He watched as her big eyes grew even bigger. _God... the last time? ... It meant that there had been more than one time and..._

"... An hour ago in the shower" he said looking at the corners of her mouth that slightly curled into a half smile before she rolled her eyes and tossed toward him the piece of sandwich in her hand.

He watched as she shook her head, avoiding his gaze. She was annoyed. She didn't like when he made fun of her. But she wasn't angry... she was _relieved..._

"It's my turn, Cuddy" he said, swallowing the bite of the sandwich she had tossed him and watching as she looked up again meeting his gaze. "Sex on a first date. Yes or no?" He asked, staring at her.

"No" she replied, touching her neck.

House continued to look at her and licked his lips.

"Liar" he said, raising an eyebrow.

Cuddy run in turn her tongue on her lips, smiling slightly and holding his gaze.

"Ours wasn't a date, House" she said, raising an eyebrow and biting her lip, still smiling and shaking her head slightly.

"I wasn't talking about us" he said looking into her eyes and again raising an eyebrow, watching her with a mischievous look "That Shriner with the hair parted on the left, _Miss I-like-sex_ " he said, staring at her.

She laughed and shook her head.

"We didn't have sex" she repeated with the same look, still touching her neck.

House moved his gaze from her eyes to the fingers of her hand that slowly moved from behind her ear to the base of her neck and vice versa. _Fuck!_ _Did she know that gesture, in the body language, was a clear signal of sexual interest?_

"So, didn't _you_ have sex that night?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

Cuddy rolled her eyes, but unable to keep from laughing. She began to understand why it was difficult to win when she played with him. And she shook her head... biting her lip and smiling. Of course she had had sex... just... not with that guy. And not... thinking about that guy...

"Little liars like you deserve a punishment, Cuddy!" He said, standing up before she could do the same.

"No" she said, trying in turn to stand up and watching him as he took an ice cube from her glass on the coffee table "House! No! Don't you dare..."

It was a _no_ , but she couldn't help laughing as she stood up in turn, then trying to escape from him.

One of his arm was enough to grab her, drawing her closer to him. Her back against his chest. She slapped the arm that held her, keeping her still, well, actually not that strong, but she couldn't stop him from slipping an ice cube into the back of her shirt neckline, letting it run along her back.

"Holy shit!" She exclaimed inhaling deeply and holding her breath, then arching her back to that feeling while a shiver ran down her back, but unable to hold back even a laugh.

He knew that she was going to make him pay for that. As soon as he loosened the grip of his arm around her waist, she took in turn an ice cube and tried to slip it blindly in his pants. But his hand was faster and it grabbed her wrist, moving it away from him, holding her arm again above her head.

"House, let go of me, you're hurting me" she said, trying to pull him away.

The way she was laughing was a clear sign that he was certainly not hurting her. Not that he had any doubt anyway.

Cuddy looked at her own arm, held in place above her head, and at the ice cube melting in her own hand, dripping in a cold trickle down her arm and then into her cleavage. And she couldn't help but shiver to that feeling. And laugh at the same time.

She tried to push him away. More to the game that because she really wanted to. And he loosened his grip slightly so that she could turn around and face him. She tried to touch him with her wet and cold hand to take at least that tiny payback, but again he was faster and he pushed her away from him, holding her by both arms.

She was beautiful, but... when she laughed without any inhibitions she was much more than beautiful.

She grabbed the last ice cube from the glass and tried to pull away again from his grip, but again it was clear that she had no chance to do so. He was taller and stronger than her. And the truth was that, actually, she didn't actually want to do it.

She run away him just to have him running after her. She moved from him just to have him moving closer. Now, exactly like it had been since the first day they met.

"House, no" she laughed again as he took both her wrists with one hand, holding them above her head so she couldn't touch him, and the back of her knee bumped against the couch. She lost her balance and she could do nothing but let herself fall on the couch pulling him with her. Laughing as he laughed with her.

She couldn't move. Trapped between the couch cushions... and him.

They looked into each other's eyes. Blue lost in blue.

He just wanted kiss her.

She just wanted to be kissed.

He looked at her eyes and then at her lips. Those lips slightly parted, just waiting for his. And her eyes. He could lose himself in the gray-blue of those eyes. He could lose himself in her...

He wanted... but... he couldn't...

"I'm sorry" he said, breaking eye contact and then looking at her again with a completely different gaze that the one with which he had looked at her just a second before.

The way her smile faded on her face struck him more than a slap in the face. He didn't want to hurt her. But it would have happened... He was a miserable person. Since the day he was born. And even if that break had made him think otherwise for a moment... he couldn't and... wouldn't... to drag her into the darkness of his life.

He wanted to kiss her. Touching those lips. That tongue. He longed to kiss her. But kissing her... it would be a point of no return. He couldn't...

"I... I'm not what you need, Cuddy" he added, standing up and leaving the room.

Cuddy stayed still. The only thing she could think about was the feeling of emptiness that the lack of his weight on her gave her... She sat up and stayed there, motionless, watching him as he walked out of the door. She stayed like that for what seemed like hours ... or perhaps only seconds... waiting for tears to come down from her eyes and releasing some of what she felt within herself. Tears that didn't come...


	11. Ice - Part 2

_This is a very short chapter but I think you're going to forgive me! I can't let you waiting for an update too long! ;) So... enjoyyy!_

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 **Chapter 11 - Ice - Part 2**

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 _"I'm sorry" he said, breaking eye contact and then looking at her again with a completely different gaze that the one with which he had looked at her just a second before._

 _The way her smile faded on her face struck him more than a slap in the face. He didn't want to hurt her. But it would have happened... He was a miserable person. Since the day he was born. And even if that break had made him think otherwise for a moment... he couldn't and... wouldn't... to drag her into the darkness of his life._

 _He wanted to kiss her. Touching those lips. That tongue. He longed to kiss her. But kissing her... it would be a point of no return. He couldn't..._

 _"I... I'm not what you need, Cuddy" he added, standing up and leaving the room._

 _Cuddy stayed still. The only thing she could think about was the feeling of emptiness that the lack of his weight on her gave her... She sat up and stayed there, motionless, watching him as he walked out of the door. She stayed like that for what seemed like hours ... or perhaps only seconds... waiting for tears to come down from her eyes and releasing some of what she felt within herself. Tears that didn't come..._

...

"What do you know... about what I need?" She said in a serious tone appearing on the door while her faltering voice betrayed just for a moment her vulnerability, then immediately regaining a dignified composure.

House stood by back, looking at the dark ocean, leaning with both hands on the wooden porch railing. He didn't turn to those words, just continuing to look in front of himself, listening to the sound of the wind through the palm leaves.

"I know who I am" he said without looking back at her "It's not what you want, Cuddy"

Cuddy stood still, just looking at his shoulders and then in turn at the dark ocean, shaking her head slightly. She wrapped her shawl tighter while a shiver ran down her back.

"You're a _selfish egocentric son of a bitch_!" She hissed, slowly enunciating every word, while the way his shoulders stiffened and he slightly bowed his head were the only signs that he had heard her words.

She inhaled deeply and blinked back tears.

"What do you know about what I want? Or about what I need?" She repeated "I didn't ask you anything, House. I've never asked you anything. And I never wanted you to be different from what you are" she repeated "You're not protecting me. You're protecting yourself. You're a _coward_ selfish son of a bitch " she said in a tone that literally cut the air between them.

"What do you want to hear, Cuddy?" He said, turning toward her and making her almost startle "Yes, I'm a selfish son of a bitch! The same son of a bitch you work every day with. The same one who sent you to Peng. I haven't changed. I'm not the kind of guy that says _I love you_..."

"I never asked that" She repeated again "And I never asked you to be what you are not" she said looking into his eyes.

He just kept looking at her with a so cold look that sent her a shiver down her spine. More than that ice cube had done only a few minutes before.

Cuddy bowed her head and ran a hand over her face.

"You're right" she said, shaking her head and making a gesture with her hand, then letting her arm fall down along her body as if she was too tired for that argue. And the way he swallowed at those three words was the only answer she needed...

"You're right," she repeated "you're _the same son of a bitch_ " she continued, looking at the way in which his jaw clenched more to those words.

"You..." she said, swallowing in turn and taking a step toward him as he didn't move, not even an inch "You're the same son of a bitch I fell in love with" she said, looking into her eyes.

She watched as he swallowed again without taking his eyes from her.

"Maybe... you're right. Maybe you're not what I need... but, you know what? You're what I want, House! I... I love you," she said, giving him the time to soften the blow of those three words "and the fact that I'll probably never hear you saying the same words doesn't change what I feel for you... and what _you_ feel for me"

House simply continued to look at her.

"Do you really think I need those three words, House? It's just... three words. Nothing more. I don't need them. And... I don't want them. You're right! You can't change what you are. Like you can't change what's among us. You can deny it. You can continue to not give him a name. But... it won't change."

She looked at him as he opened his mouth to reply and silenced him just raising a hand, glaring at him in exasperation.

"What?" She said, piercing him with her eyes and practically reading his mind "It's just physical attraction, House? ... God!" She said, shaking her head and looking away for a moment, looking over House's shoulders as if she could see the sea even in the darkness.

"Is it because you wanted to have sex that you held my hand while I was in a coma?" She said, still looking into his eyes and shaking her head slightly. "Your leg hurts even when you sleep in a bed of a five-star Resort... and you slept for twelve nights, twelve, House, on a battered armchair... Why? Because you wanted to fuck me, House? Do you really want to convince yourself that it's just that? Well... " she said with a gesture of exasperation of her hand "Fine! Suit yours... "

She didn't finish that word.

That _suit yourself_ got lost as soon as he suddenly cupped her face with both hands and his tongue kept her from articulating part of that sound. She stood motionless at that move. She stood still as his tongue invaded her mouth and her cheeks caught fire on the contact with his hands. Just for a moment... before her own tongue found his and her hands found the hair on his nape, holding him close.

Everything dissolved. There was no longer anything else than his scent... than the warmth of his breath ... than his tongue into her mouth ... than his hands caressing her in the sweetest and sensual way in the world. She had never felt so _of someone_ like into that kiss. She closed her eyes completely getting lost in that kiss. And she moved her hands along his neck and along his back muscles while, at the same time, his hand went down between her shoulder blades holding her closer to him. Their slightly labored breathing mixed with the sound of the wind through the palm trees and that of the waves crashing on the beach. The ocean still rough after the storm.

Cuddy shivered, clutching more in his arms, but not letting go of his lips.

"I... really am a son of a bitch" he said looking into her eyes, this time with a half smile, moving a lock of hair behind her ear and stroking her cheekbone with his thumb.

"Yes, you are" she replied, wrapping her arms more around his neck as if to be sure he couldn't escape again. She smiled and brushed again his lips and then his tongue.

"But you love me anyway ..." he said with a very puzzled look, though unable not to smile as she stared at her and her smile widened on his lips while she nodded at the same time, slightly biting her lip.

"Maybe ... it's a neurological damage" she said raising an eyebrow and smiling while another shiver ran down her back to the feeling of his thumb that brushed her lips, freeing the lip she kept trapping slightly between her teeth.

His lips sought hers, but he just touch them, still continuing to stare at her as the warmth of his breath was enough to make her shiver again.

He stroked her arms, still wrapped around his neck, then moving his hands on her shoulders and back.

"Maybe it 's better to go back inside... you have goose bumps..." he whispered on her lips, caressing her shoulders to warm her "Are you cold?"

Cuddy shook her head still touching his lips with hers and smiled, then touching his tongue and kissing him lightly on the lips.

"Not because I'm cold" she said seeing his lips curling into a smile as this time he looked for her tongue.

Was there something better than her body pressed against his? Than her breasts pressed against his chest? Than her arms wrapped around his neck? Than her fingers in his hair? Than her mouth... lips ... tongue... than her breath lost in his...?

 _God..._ he'd have wanted to be able to tell her that _I love you_...

"I didn't want just to fuck you" he said instead as a half smile appeared on his lips, watching as a smile appeared in turn on hers.

"I know" she replied biting her lip and seeing him smiling for a moment before he took that same lip between his lips, sucking on it and making her close her eyes to the chill that feeling sparked, intensifying the goose bumps on her arms.

House looked at her lips and then again at her eyes.

"Liar" he said with a smile on her lips resting his forehead on hers.

Cuddy looked up at him with a questioning look.

"I know you don't want just to fuck me" she said staring at him as she couldn't help but smile again.

"Yes, but ... it's not what I meant," he said again touching her tongue "it's not true that you don't care about hearing _that_ from me"

Cuddy smiled and closed her eyes for a moment, then opening them again and looking into his eyes.

" _That you love me_?" She said as he nodded, looking at her mouth and then again at her eyes "Maybe," she said, with a half smile that was actually obviously a _yes_... "But... your eyes and your mouth don't speak the same language, House" she said looking into his eyes and running her tongue on her lips, touching his "Do you really think you're so stoic, Dr. House? " She said seeing him smiling back.

He stroked her mouth with his thumb, freeing again her lip and getting lost in the warmth of her breath, then letting his tongue making its way between those lips in another long and deep kiss.


	12. Puzzle

_Here I am again. I told this story was going to be_ different _from my other ones, didn't I?_

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 **...**

 **Chapter 12 - Puzzle**

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 _He stroked her mouth with his thumb, freeing again her lip and getting lost in the warmth of her breath, then letting his tongue making its way between those lips in another long and deep kiss._

Not the passionate kiss of a few minutes before. The one in which he had had to restrain himself not to push her against the wall and take her right there, making her moan under that same porch. From the way she had kissed him back she might have wanted him to. But it wasn't what he wanted right now. He wanted to explore every millimeter of her mouth. To bite that lip that kept driving him crazy and to savor every millimeter of her. Slow... and deep... and sensual ... like what was between them.

 _How many women had he kissed in his life?_ Not so many as he had told Wilson, but still enough to be now completely caught off guard. Had he ever wanted a woman so much he can actually feel it driving him insane? ... _God, she_ was in his arms... after that long month... after twenty years... after he almost lost her. She was in his arms... and he just wanted to get lost in her mouth. Never as at that time he wanted to get lost inside a woman... inside her...

 _God, Cuddy, what are you doing to me?_ He thought, stroking her face with his thumb as he broke that kiss, then brushing even that same lip with his thumb, looking at her as she opened her eyes, meeting his.

He could feel the warmth of her breath that got lost in his, and looked at her mouth, moving again his pad on her lips.

She breathed in to that feeling, but no sound came from her lips. She just close her lips placing a kiss on his fingertip and that feeling immediately ran from his hand to his groin. How could a so simple, chaste and innocent gesture be so powerful?

"I don't want to have sex with you, Cuddy" He said out of the blue, meeting her gaze.

 _What?_ Where had those words come from? How happened that his brain had been disconnected from his mouth? Since when did he let his heart intervene between his groin and brain? He wasn't even sure to have one! Of course he wanted to have sex with her! Feeling the warmth of her body... her moans... seeing her tilting her head back as she climax... Because, God, he knew she tilted her head back as she climax! _Jesus Christ!_ She was here, in his arms. Dilated pupils in her gray-blue irises, moist lips, lightly labored breathing... signs shouting what she wanted more than if she had screamed it aloud! She was in his arms after having told him she loved him... and all he could say was that _he didn't want to have sex with her?_

The way she looked at him took him by surprise as much as the words that had just come from his own lips.

She smiled. And she licked her lips before biting again slightly that same lip. He just looked at her, moving his gaze from her eyes to her mouth and then again to her eyes.

Did she have just a vague idea of how much that gesture turned him on?

"For once we agree, House" she said on his lips looking into his eyes.

For a moment those words had on him the same impact as a cold shower. What...? _She had told she loved him... and..._

Cuddy clearly felt his back stiffen, but left him no time to take a step back. She moved her hands from his shoulders to the back of his neck, clinging closer to him. If his words had instilled doubt in her about the fact that he didn't desire her body _in that way_ , well, now she had no doubt left. And the sound of her breathing suddenly stopping in her throat at the sensation of his partial erection against her, completely dissolved even the doubts that had been briefly instilled in House's mind.

He smiled back, moving his hands on her waist and holding her in that position.

"Don't you want to have sex with me?" He whispered mischievously on her lips pushing even more his pelvis against her.

Cuddy closed her eyes for a moment, smiling and shaking her head, whispering a barely audible _'no'_.

House couldn't help but smile in turn, running his tongue on his lips as he looked into her eyes. Her pupils so dilated for the dim light and her arousal that her eyes were almost dark. Her lips was saying ' _no'_ , her eyes was shouting that ' _yes'_ ... her whole body was screaming that _yes_.

"Shit!" He exclaimed, shaking his head, but failing to hold back the half-smile that escaped his lips "I had already traded the mark!" He said, looking at the quizzical expression on her face "... _I-like-sex-Do-I-need-to-stitch-a-letter-on-my-tops-House?™_ " He replied looking into her eyes while a laugh exploded from his mouth. "You know? You could have had a percentage of sales, and..."

Cuddy laughed and suddenly took his face with both hands.

"Oh... shut up, House" She laughed not letting him finish the sentence and passionately kissing him on the mouth.

 _God, Cuddy!_ She knew how to kiss... she definitely knew how to kiss... well, he remembered her kisses but... after twenty years... it was even better than he remembered. For a moment the thought of other men kissing her invaded his mind, but the thought vanished at the moaning that escaped her lips before her tongue found his again. And all disappeared. Her mouth, her tongue, her warmth, her scent... there was nothing else.

The passionate kiss became more and more slow and deep as their tongues continued to caress each other. Their lips breaking away only the time to get some air, then seeking each other again a moment later. Neither of them wanted to stop that.

 _God!_ It drove her crazy how from time to time he left her mouth to suck her lip, biting it lightly between his teeth, then again pushing his tongue into her mouth seeking hers. Could a man unleash such a pleasure just with a kiss? _God!_ Had she really told him she didn't want to have sex with him? She had never wanted a man so much in her life. She was so aroused that one light touch would have been enough to make her scream his name... But... no. She didn't want to have sex with him. Not now .. not yet... not risking that both of them regret that the next day... hiding again in their shells as they had done so many times.

They were both so screwed up. So different and yet... so alike. They were complicated... and if she wanted to give a chance to both of them she had to keep sex out of what was between them. Sex was... easy. And, God... she knew how much their bodies could be perfect together. It was easy. Passion. Lust. Desire. It was instinct. And instinct was easy. But then? She knew he had the same doubts. The same fears. What was beyond the pleasure they both wanted at that right moment? There was more. She knew there was more. And she didn't want sex. She wanted that _'more'._

She wanted him to think about that 'I love you'. That he could be aware of what he was about to jump into. And sex was too easy. He had taken care of her as she never thought he could. He had let her see a side of himself that perhaps he didn't even remembered . And he had no idea how much that _'I don't want to have sex with you, Cuddy'_ meant to her. She wanted nothing else than a man _who didn't want her only to have sex with her_. And she wanted that _act_ to be something more than an ancestral union of bodies... She wanted his body and his soul. And she wanted both of them. Together. She wanted _to make love with him_. And they weren't synonyms. They might look like synonymous. But they weren't. Not for her.

She savored again the feeling of his tongue lightly stroking her lip before his mouth closed, again sucking that same lip. And she held back the moan that sensation unleashed, replacing it with a deep, slow sigh, as she opened her eyes meeting the blue of his.

She smiled as he leaned his forehead on hers, stroking her back with both hands, moving them slowly from her back to her shoulders and vice versa. She clung closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder and simply letting him caressing her.

Minutes... or seconds... or hours... Time stopped and got lost in that embrace...

He could have held her tight in his arms for hours, just lost in the warmth of her body close to his and in the scent of her hair. He really would have liked time to stop. Because... _so now what?_

The weight of her body resting on his awakened him from that thought, preventing his mind from starting thinking wildly.

"If you're about to pass out ..." He said with a smile on her hair "... warn my leg first" he said, hearing her laugh against his chest.

"I've never been better, House" she said wrapping her arms tighter around his shoulders, but not lifting her head to look at him "But collapsing on your leg might be a good idea to prevent you from running away again" she added, again without looking up, but feeling his smile on her hair.

"Well, Cuddy, it depends on which _leg_ you're going to collapse" he said while a laugh escaped from Cuddy's mouth and her hand slapped his shoulder.

House laughed at what was her predictable reaction to his pun, but held her more in his arms in turn, in what was a silent _'I'm not going anywhere without you'_ , still savoring the scent of her hair and the feeling of her body in his arms.

"C'mon, let's go back inside" he said, smiling and kissing her hair "I don't want to be responsible even for your pneumonia" he said moving his hands on her back, caressing and warming her at the same time.

Cuddy just replied with a slight nod... without moving an inch.

"Do I have to carry you inside?" He asked, letting out a half laugh.

Another vague nod. To which this time she added a _hhhmmm_ that could be both a _no_ and a _yes_... and House shook his head, unable not to smile again.

"If you want I can also take you to bed, Cuddy" he laughed, holding her closer to him, with a vaguely mischievous tone of voice as her answer was again just a _hhhmmm_ that this time, however, sound definitely like a _yes_...

And House couldn't help but laugh.

"Yes? I mean... do you want me to take you to bed?" He said again, this time watching her as she raised her head.

"Yes..." she said, meeting the blue of his eyes "... if you come with me" she added, smiling slightly.

House looked at her with a quizzical look, raising an eyebrow.

"Do you want... _to sleep with me_?" He asked with a mischievous look "You just said you don't want to sleep with me."

Cuddy couldn't help but smile slightly bending her head to one side and then to the other one as if to say _'well ... more or less'..._

"Um... I'm asking you to sleep with me" she said, biting her lip slightly "... in the _literal_ sense of the word" she said looking at the corners of his mouth that curled slightly.

His response caught her off guard. Or maybe not. No words. A gesture. A single gesture. One simple gesture.

He looked at her and slid his hand from her shoulder down her arm, slowly tracing with his fingertips the line down to her forearm, to her wrist and to the back of her hand. And he laced his fingers with hers. He gently stroked her thumb with his own thumb and just looked at her, taking a step back and then pulling her gently by the arm as he opened the door and she followed him, just biting her lip slightly.

...

As soon as she walked out of the bathroom, House knew that he had no way to share the bed with her without having an erection. And he cursed himself for having just brushed his teeth in the three minutes in which he stayed in the bathroom. _Five_ , and maybe now he would at least have had some possibility to manage the pressing tension in his groin. He settled back the bed sheet and looked at her. It was obvious that she could be sexy even with a jute sack on ... but with his T-shirt on... God... that turned him on as much as the thought of seeing her in a silk nightie.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked smiling, meeting his gaze, for a moment unable to decipher it.

"About the money I owe to Wilson" he said running his tongue on his lips and watching her as she slightly shook her head, smiling in turn.

"I knew Wilson would have been between us!" She said, laughing.

House looked at her as she put her clothes in one of the drawers, slightly bending over.

"You're not wearing a bra" He said as soon as she turned and approached the bed.

She just bowed her head looking at the T-shirt she was wearing and then again up into his eyes, shrugging slightly.

"I never wear a bra to sleep" she said with an innocent look that triggered in him a stronger reaction than if she had used a malicious tone.

House ran his tongue on his lips.

"If you're not wearing panties yet, I can't promise to behave" He said, looking straight at her with a more than mischievous smirk, glancing at the T-shirt hem caressing her thighs and then back up to her eyes.

Cuddy couldn't help but smile, slightly bending her head to the side. She looked into his eyes, slightly lifting her shirt by one side revealing the rubber band of a pair of black panties.

House bit his lip and smiled, still looking at her as she sat on the bed and slipped under the bed sheets beside him, lying down and resting her head on the pillow, facing him.

House pulled her closer to him and simply stroked her arm.

"Are you sure you can trust _sleeping_ with me?" He asked, raising an eyebrow, moving his hand on her back and holding back the desire to lift that damn T-shirt.

Cuddy smiled and shook her head in what could be both a no and a yes.

"Honestly..." she whispered, brushing his lips with her "... I don't know if I can trust myself" she said, smiling and looking at him as a smile appeared on his lips in turn.

He kissed her on the lips, just slightly touching her tongue, and whispered a _goodnight_ , then making her turn, letting her rest her back against his chest.

He kissed her hair. And that was the exact moment in which he really knew what he felt for her. In which he admitted to himself what he really felt for her.

He could be there for hours just holding her in his arms, listening to the sound of her breathing. Not sex. Not passion. Not the satisfying pleasure of an orgasm. Only his body close to hers. It wasn't rational. He had a thousand questions and zero answers. She was his unsolved puzzle. And that was love. Loving someone without knowing why.


	13. More

_Thank you soooo much for all your amazing reviews! They mean a lot to me!_

* * *

 ** _..._**

 **Chapter 13 - More**

 **...**

* * *

Cuddy opened her eyes in the dim light of the room. He was still there. Near her. Embraced to her.

She didn't move... just enjoying the feeling of his hand on her hip.

She smiled to herself at the thought of how, when awake, he had held that hand diligently on her waist, over which was his own T-shirt. In his sleep that hand had slipped further down, finding her skin. Unconsciously. Or maybe not.

 _How strong could that feeling be?_

Deprive him of the intimacy she wanted too had been her last thought but... she wanted their relationship to be something more than sex... for both of them...

She wrapped his arm more around her own body, feeling the warmth of his body, and let that sense of protection to take her back to sleep again.

...

House opened his eyes trying to get used to the light of the room, and smiled at the view in front of his eyes.

 _How long didn't he sleep with a woman?_ Certainly ... he had never slept with a woman with whom he hadn't had sex first! Yeah, well, of course except his mother!

 _What the hell was she doing to him?_ _What the hell had she done him_? Whatever it was... he didn't want her to stop...

He watched her as she slept, not anymore embraced to him as when they had fallen asleep. She was facing him, without touching him, but still very close to him.

Watching her in her sleeping. Sleeping... The most natural thing in the world... Yet, he couldn't take his eyes off her.

She was beautiful. Very beautiful. Not... _more_ beautiful. She was beautiful in her sleeping, but... he missed her eyes...

It was what he had missed more in those 12 days... the look in her eyes. Eyes that often shouted what her mouth barely whispered.

He watched as her eyelids fluttered, before she opened her eyes meeting his gaze.

She smiled as soon as the gray-blue of her eyes met the blue of his, and whispered an almost imperceptible "Hi".

"Good morning" he replied smiling back.

Her smile grew larger but she covered her face with both hands, then running a hand through her hair.

"I'm a mess..." She whispered.

The impeccable control-freak of hers was trying to get the better of her.

He moved her hands from her face, smiling.

"You're beautiful" He whispered, kissing her lightly on the lips "Don't you go running this morning?" He asked, slightly biting her lower lip.

Cuddy smiled.

"I have a better company than my iPod this morning" she said clinging a little more to him, closing for a moment her eyes to the feeling of his body against hers. Of his initial erection against her thigh.

 _Could she really play with fire without getting burned? And not with an ordinary man... with House!_

"You're really testing my self-control, Cuddy" he said with a mischievous look, looking into her eyes and sucking her lip again.

He looked at her with a slightly amused look as she tried to move a little away from him with a guilty look in her beautiful eyes. But his arm didn't let her move an inch, wrapping her body and holding her next to him.

"So... don't you really want to have sex with me?" He asked, raising an eyebrow and gently stroking her waist looking into her eyes.

"Actually... your words, House" she replied smiling, staring back at him and not moving an inch, still keeping her arm under the pillow and savoring the feeling of his hand caressing her.

"And has you chosen just this time to agree with me?" He asked smiling, watching as she lightly bit her lip.

He moved his hand to caress her face, again freeing that lip and letting his thumb linger on it, slowly moving from right to left tracing the line of her mouth.

They kept to stare at each other.

 _Was that really the same man? The same asshole she had been working with for so many years?_ He was that one... but definitely a lot more... How could that simple touch running directly to her most intimate part?

She couldn't resist the temptation to close her lips, lightly touching his finger with her tongue, then gently sucking his fingertip.

House looked at her mouth, and then again at her eyes.

 _Fuck Greg! If this is enough to get you hard what can she do you with a..._

He shook off that thought and swallowed...

"If it's really what you want... you're not helping me, Cuddy." He said, smiling slyly and looking at her as she smiled more, closing her eyes and instinctively biting her lip again.

"And if you continue to bite that lip of yours I swear it won't be the only thing I'll suck." He said again, accentuating the feeling in her intimate part.

Cuddy moved her arm from under her pillow on his face and stroked his stubble, whispering a guilty "sorry" and smiling as he gently kissed her on the lips.

"It's just that... I know it sounds stupid but ... I'd like our _first time_ to be something more than sex, House" she said, feeling very stupid for that _romantic-teenager_ sentence.

House smiled and kissed her lips again, but raised an eyebrow.

"Our _first time_ was on the desk in your dorm room, Cuddy." He said looking at her with a mischievous look as she nodded and smiled, biting her lip "So..." he said, raising an eyebrow, looking at her lip and then at her eyes again "Would you like something more than sex for our _second time_?" He mischievously asked sucking on her lip again.

"Technically ..." she replied, smiling on his mouth and looking at him with the same look he had given her "... if you put it that way, House... it will be the third"

She watched him as he nodded smiling back while the same image appeared in front of the eyes of both of them.

"Yeah" he said nodding, in turn in a very mischievously way, biting her lip again.

 _... Yeah... on her desk it hadn't been enough..._

...

 _He had watched her as she tried to fix her dress, smoothing the fabric with both hands and then taking a pencil from the same desk, using it to fix her hair in a sort of chignon. The same pencil he had stared at for hours during that semester...well, when he was not staring at a much more interesting part of her._

 _"Do you really have to go?" She had asked him on her bedroom door with a more mischievous than sad look, touching his belt buckle with the tip of her fingers._

 _She was beautiful. Even more when alcohol made her a little uninhibited. The rumpled dress for that sexual intercourse directly on her desk, still half dressed._

 _"Are you insatiable, Lisa Cuddy?" He asked her with a mischievous look, taking her face with one hand and stroking her cheekbone with his thumb before moving his hand through her hair, pulling out that pencil and looking at her as she moved her head slightly, letting her curls fall on her shoulders._

 _She hadn't answered, just looking into his eyes as she undid his belt again, then starting to unbutton his shirt buttons. Her fingers had slowly lingered on each button, brushing the light down on his chest, once again not completely taking off his shirt._

 _He had continued to look at her while she unbuttoned his pants, sliding them down his legs, and looking at him as she slipped her hand into his boxers. Her pupils had dilated to that feeling and she had bitten her lip, then running her tongue on her lips._

 _She hadn't had time to do what she wanted to do. He had closed the door with the heel of the shoe, and his hands were sunk among her curls as his tongue voraciously found hers again. This time he had found the zipper of her dress, letting it drop to the ground and leaving her completely naked. He had put his hands on her buttocks lifting her while she wrapped her legs around his waist, then carrying her to her bed. A single bed. He had been standing, staring at her as he took off his shirt, then letting it fall on the floor. Completely naked ... curls scattered on the pillow and that damn lip between her teeth ... He had taken off his jeans with one hand, dropping them on the floor together with the shirt while his other hand snatched a condom foil using his teeth for help. She hadn't almost had time to realize that. Her eyes lost in his and his in hers. Why on earth couldn't he look away from those gray-blue eyes? He had found her mouth like a thirsty man seeks an oasis in the desert as he move on top of her entering her in one motion that completely nullified any thoughts... in both of them. Moans. And sweat. And pleasure. It was sex... it was just an ancestral instinct._

 _He had looked at her and she had looked at him before she closed her eyes, tilting her head back and slightly opening her mouth, moaning louder as she came. Holy Christ... he suddenly closed his eyes as the contraction of her inner muscles sent him in turn over the limit. And her pleasure amplified his... and his hers ...to the extreme... Holy shit! He had never shared that pleasure... Fuck! ... If that was an orgasm then he had never really had one._

 _"Fuck, Cuddy" it was the only words that his brain could put together as he came back on the Earth.  
_

 _She hadn't answered. Just smiling, with closed eyes, as her chest rose and fell quickly and her breathing was still labored. Still lost in that pleasure._

 _Her hand had found his bottom holding him still as soon as she had felt him slightly pulling out._

 _God... her inner muscles continued to contract... more and more slowly, but ... what the hell had this man did to her?  
_

 _Neither of them had said a word. They had stayed like that ... She had barely felt him slipping out of her body after minutes ... or hours ... now already in the numbness of sleep. She had felt his hand stroking her body, and his body close to hers as they both let themselves go to a couple of hours of sleeping, embraced in that narrow bed. He had whispered her a goodnight to which she had answered just with a hhhmmm. He had sought her lips and she had sought his in a tender kiss that again had got lost in the numbness of sleep._

 _The morning after, the only reminder of him was his scent on the bed sheets..._

...

He watched her as she looked away and then again at him with a completely different look in the eyes.

"We had sex..." she whispered looking at his lips, and then looking up to stare at his eyes, still stroking his stubble "... and you disappeared the day after..."

She swallowed, looking at the expression of surprise in his eyes.

"This time... I don't want sex, House... I want to know that you'll be there... the day after... and the one after that..."

House stared at her.

 _Was it this? Fuck... after almost twenty years... was it this?_

"I was gonna call you..." He said as she shook her head slightly, smiling a bitter smile.

"No... don't do that. You don't have to excuse yourself. It's ok, House. It was sex. I wanted that as much as you... we were young ... It was a long time ago and ..."

"No," He said, interrupting the way of her thoughts "I was gonna come see you. Figure out where things would go from there. That was the morning I got the call from the Dean and I was expelled from my first med school, and there didn't seem any point... That call overshadowed everything else... "

He watched as she swallowed trapping now completely her lower lip while analyzing those words.

He never thought he had hurt her. It had been a night of passion... no promises... no expectations...

He caressed her cheekbone again.

"I have already been something that is overshadowed by events of life... now I want to be something more, House... more than a pleasant distraction during a vacation..."

She looked into his eyes as he held her gaze. A look she couldn't decipher. _Had she scared him?_ Sex was one thing. Having a relationship was something else. She didn't want him running away again... but it was a risk she had to take. She knew what she wanted. And she knew what she didn't. And she didn't want to wake up again with _just his scent on the bed sheets._

House looked at her, moving a lock of hair behind her ear and smiled...

"Fine," He said looking into her eyes "because that's exactly what I want..." He said, touching her lips.

A couple of knocks on the door distracted them from that moment. They stared at each other for a moment as he leaned his forehead on hers.

"I got it." Cuddy whispered, kissing him lightly on the lips and getting up quickly from the bed, taking her robe and putting it on as she went to open the door.

The room service guy greeted her and she stood on the door as he walked in and placed the breakfast tray on the table.

"Have a nice day, _Mrs. House_ " He said, greeting her again as she walked out of the door as she greeted him in turn.

House looked at her as she closed the door, still slightly smiling, then peeking under the tray cover, taking a grape and bringing it to her mouth. He hugged her from behind and kissed her neck, then resting his head on her shoulder.

"You like it..." he said, this time kissing her shoulder.

"What?" She asked, slightly turning her head toward him and stroking his stubble with her hand, as by the tone of his voice it was clear he wasn't referring to that grapes.

House didn't answer and just looked at her running his tongue on his lips while the corners of his mouth curled into a smile.

"Um... it was weird at first..." she said again, stroking his stubble again.

"Not anymore?" He asked, raising an eyebrow as he kissed her cheek and then the corner of her mouth.

She just looked at him and smiled, then tilting her head back so he could kiss her even more. His mouth found hers and a moan escaped from the lips of both of them as soon as their tongues met. His hand stroked her neck and chin and held her head still, then stroking her cheek with his thumb. Her hand moved through the hair on his nape. They both opened their eyes as soon as their lips drew apart... just to look for each other again, as another moan escaped from her mouth...

"I can wait, Cuddy..." he said looking into her eyes and smiling, still stroking her face "Are you sure _you_ can?" He asked with a mischievous look as she smiled, seeking his lips again.

"My willpower is really being tested" she said, smiling and gently kissing his lips again.

* * *

Another day of sun and sea. He could definitely get used to that routine. And he could definitely get used to the feeling of her fingers on his skin.

"I'm gonna get something to drink," she said, watching House as he slept motionless in the sun "I'm hot" she said, bending over to kiss him on the lips. His eyes still closed.

His arm wrapped her waist keeping her from getting up, forcing her to kiss him lightly on the lips again.

"You're _smoking hot_ " he whispered on her lips, opening his eyes and mischievously looking into her eyes.

Cuddy smiled and ran her tongue on her lips.

"Not what I meant" she smiled, kissing him again on the lips "I better bring a drink _to cool you_ too" she said tapping her hand on his chest.

He didn't reply and just smiled, taking the hand resting on his chest and intertwining his fingers with hers, then taking it to his lips. She stood still to that gesture, while his lips and stubble touched the palm of her hand and a shiver ran along her arm and down to her belly... Oh my God... Did he really do that? Have Gregory House just... kissed her hand? _Tenderly_ kissed the palm of her hand?

She met his gaze, slightly biting her lip.

They had known each other for a lifetime... and _this House_ wasn't really different from the House she knew. He had always made fun of her. And he still did. He had always teased her. And he still did. He had always made her uncomfortable with his jokes. And he still did. He didn't talk about his feelings for her. He didn't tell her how important she was for him. He didn't say _'I love you'_... It was the same House... but... the way he kissed her ... the way he caressed her... just the way he looked at her... _God..._ where that part of him was in all those years? How many women could tell of having seen that part of him? Stacy. And... maybe a few else... For sure not the casual partners he was used to after his break-up with Stacy... Occasional and fleeting relationships. Just sex. Well, or so she thought... After all House was obsessed with sex. With sex and sexual innuendos... those ones couldn't probably even be called _relationships_... but... _God_... was it the same man? They shared the same bed... caresses and kisses... nothing more. And she knew he wanted her. It would have been impossible not to feel his partial erection against her backside when they sleep embraced. Had he really agreed to wait? To wait for her? Not going beyond kisses and caresses, letting their relationship be something more...?

House stared at her, not leaving her hand and watching her as a smile appeared on her lips at the feeling of his tongue on her skin and of his mouth sucking her skin just a moment before his teeth bit her lightly. Not strong enough to hurt her, but enough to make the muscles of her most intimate part contract.

And she closed her eyes, smiling more.

He always teased her. He kept teasing her. In a way that... _oh God_... she practically was always turned on...

"I better go" she said, smiling, standing up and kissing his hand in turn, her fingers still intertwined with his.

She came back a few minutes later and smiled watching him. Still motionless in the sun. Still apparently asleep.

"HOUSE!" She exclaimed laughing as soon as he grabbed her arm, pulling her to him, without opening his eyes and almost making her spill the water from the glass in her hand.

He watched her as she took another sip and kissed her lips. Her lips were cold and she didn't open them when he tried to sneak his tongue in her mouth, but just laughed. She swallowed without drawing her lips apart from his and let an ice cube dropping from her mouth to his, staring at him with a half mischievous and half evil look. House couldn't help but laugh, closing his eyes and letting that piece of ice melt on his tongue. He met her gaze again when he reopened his eyes. Her lips touched his lips again, but she didn't kiss him. She looked into his eyes and let another much smaller ice cube brush his lips while a trickle of cold water ran from his lips down to his neck and chest making him shiver.

"Shit, Cuddy!" He laughed meeting the challenging look in her eyes. She was paying him back. For that Truth or Dare punishment.

"Do you want war?" He said, looking at in turn with a half challenging and half amused look at the same time, reaching for her while she stood up.

"House, no," she said, laughing, moving the glass away from him. But he didn't reach for that glass. He wrapped an arm around her legs, just below her bottom, and lifted her in a rapid gesture, settling her on his shoulder like a potatoes sack.

"House, don't" she repeated, in a mix of amusement and disapproval, while his arm held her tight.

She couldn't move. Well, she could, but she had to stay still if she wanted to avoid to fall on the ground together with him. And she knew exactly what he was going to do.

"House, please, no," she said laughing, still upside down, as she could only see his back and the sand beneath them.

Sand. And then water.

"Begging isn't going to help you," he said, laughing, dropping her in the water like a stone.

He watched as she reemerged from the water laughing and running her hands over her face, moving her wet hair away from her face.

"I hate you" she said, laughing, looking at him as he laughed too.

He reached for her, drawing her to himself and wrapping an arm around her waist.

"Really?" He asked her, looking at her lips and then at her eyes.

"No" she replied, shaking her head and putting her arms around his neck, smiling.

He stroked her wet skin and looked into her eyes. How could that feeling be almost better than sex? He just wanted to touch her. He just wanted to kiss her. And... he just wanted to make her laugh. And that was... better than sex. More than sex. It was _more_. _She was more_.

He caressed her face with his thumb and sought her lips.

He wanted to tell her that _I love you_. He wanted to tell her she was the only woman to make him feel what he felt at that moment. She had given him the worst moments of his life. And the best ones. How did she do that? How can she make him feel so alive? To turn ordinary things into _extraordinary_ ones.

He found her lips letting her tongue find his in a long kiss.


	14. Balut

**Chapter 14 - Balut**

 **...**

* * *

House watched as she fastened her sandals. A short strapless dress. An oriental motif with dark green, blue, purple and red shades.

"You said you didn't like that dress..." he said, looking at her and smiling slightly.

Cuddy looked up and smiled.

"Because... well, it highlights a little too much _my B-side_ " she said smiling and looking into his eyes, laughing and shaking her head.

"Well, Cuddy," he said laughing "... that's exactly why I like it"

He looked at her as she smiled, gently biting her lip and nodding.

"And that's exactly why I bought it," she said with a very mischievous look, standing up and approaching him "Because you liked it..." she pointed out, running her tongue on her lips.

He put his hands on her hips as she put her arms around his neck.

"So... did you buy it to have me staring at your ass?" He asked her looking at her lips and then at her eyes again.

"... to have you staring at me" She said, touching his lips with her tongue.

"You don't need this dress for that" he said with a mischievous look looking into her eyes and finding her tongue.

...

Where are we going? She asked as she walked beside him, in the opposite direction to that of the Resort restaurant.

"That is a great restaurant," he said nodding toward the Resort "... but you can't stay in the Philippines without tasting the real Filipino cuisine, Cuddy." He said turning his head to look at her.

"So... are you taking me out to dinner?" She asked turning in turn just her head toward him, smiling "... like a _date_ , House?" She added, tilting her head to the side and looking into his eyes.

"One of the best restaurants in Boracay." He said looking back at her and smiling "Well, according to Helen at least" he said laughing "And... who knows, maybe you'll make an exception to your _principles_ " he added, winking at her and taking her hand at the same time as she rolled her eyes.

...

They entered that quaint little restaurant. A bit far from the typical touristic streets. House had a few words with the woman who welcomed them and leaded them to their table. In Filipino.

"You're sexy when you speak a foreign language" she said, looking into his eyes as they sat down at the table.

"Just when I speak a foreign language?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

She replied just with a smile, running her tongue on her lips and taking the menu in front of herself.

House ordered a bottle of wine and watched her as she read the menu, biting his lip but unable to hold back a smile as he watched her.

He met her gaze as she suddenly looked up from the menu.

"Oh my God..." she said, looking at him "boiled fertilized duck egg?" She said, her eyes widening in a mixture of astonishment and disgust.

House couldn't help but laugh.

"The _balut_ is considered a delicacy" he said, laughing.

"How can you eat a duck chick still in its egg, and consider it a delicacy?" She said, shaking her head, this time with a very disgusted look.

"A duck _embryo_ , Cuddy!" He pointed out with a smile "Anyway... it's not different from eating a calf steak! A big-eyed cute calf. So, why are you shocked by a duck embryo and not by a poor calf? It's just a cultural issue"

She looked at him and gave him a nod somewhere between a yes and a no.

"Right" she said, smiling "You just reminded me why I should turn vegetarian"

"However, it's considered an aphrodisiac, Cuddy" he said with a smile, looking down at the menu again.

She couldn't hold back the laughter that escaped from her lips and House look up at her again, watching her as she nodded.

"Sure," she laughed "if you can have sex with me while holding my hair as I vomit... you're welcome!" She said, laughing as he laughed in turn.

"Fine" he said, shaking his head "I'd better order for you too" he added, smiling.

"No chicks" she said, staring at him.

"No _embryos_ " He pointed out again, staring back at her.

Cuddy rolled her eyes and shook her head, however unable not to smile slightly.

"What's your problem with still-unborn living beings?" She said looking into his eyes.

"No problem with that, Cuddy," he said, shrugging slightly, "But they're embryos. It's not something you can contest" he said, still staring at her.

Cuddy just stared at him, then shaking her head slightly, looking down and biting her lip.

He watched as she swallowed, still looking at the menu in her hands, but not reading it. Her eyes focused on a fixed spot.

"Hey," he said as she didn't look up at him, "What did I say?" He said, looking at her as she swallowed again.

"Nothing, House" she replied, shaking her head again and looking up only for a split second before looking down again.

 _Nothing._ He didn't have so much experience of romantic relationships, but he had enough to know that the faster a woman says _nothing_ the bigger is the mess that is going to happen! What the hell had he said? They had talked about that dozens of times. A hundred perhaps. Wasn't it true that an embryo was _an embryo_? What the hell were they talking about? Shit... not about that damn boiled egg apparently...

"Hey..." he repeated reaching for her hand.

The fact she didn't move it away was actually something good... and he watched her as she looked at her own hand clasped in his, and at his thumb caressing it lightly.

"Um..." she sighed "sorry..." she said, looking up and briefly meeting his gaze again "Order whatever you want. Whatever _without embryos_ will be fine," she said, as a smile that however didn't reach her eyes appeared on her lips "I'm starving ..:"

House continued to stare at her for a few seconds, but motioned to the waitress and ordered for both of them.

"Cuddy," he said, looking at her again as she took a sip of wine "What's wrong?" He asked meeting her gaze "When I behave like an asshole I do it on purpose. Ninety-nine times out of a hundred. This is not one of those times. What did I say?"

"Nothing," she repeated "Really... don't worry" she said, with another slight smile.

Definitely it wasn't a ' _nothing'_. It was quite _something_ she didn't want to talk about...

...

House looked at the waitress as she placed on the table the serving of _halo halo_ he had ordered while Cuddy was at the bathroom. He met her gaze as she walked back to the table and sat down again in front of him.

"You can't go back to Princeton without having tasted this first" he said with a smile, taking another sip of wine from his glass and watching her as she looked at the bowl in front of herself.

"Only if there are no boiled chicks into it " She answered, this time with a smile that made her eyes shine, watching the half coconut shell that was the bowl for that dish.

"Traumatized by _balut_!" He said, shaking his head and then gesturing to the waitress, probably ordering something else. She couldn't tell since he always talked to her strictly in Filipino.

House watched Cuddy as she sank the tip of her spoon into the bowl watching that dish with a slightly suspicious look.

Tropical fruits in what looked like a mix of shaved ice and evaporated milk... and maybe caramel... and colored jellies. She didn't eat jellies since... Honestly she didn't remember since when! She smiled. A dessert... definitely a dessert... But... corn? And... sweet beans? And... what? Sweet potatoes... A decidedly weird dessert... well... according to her standards of course!

She dug her spoon into that sort of creamy shaved ice and brought it to her mouth, letting that cold cream melt on her tongue.

Sweet... very sweet actually, but very refreshing too.

"It's really delicious" she said looking up and meeting House's eyes, who smiled back.

He looked at her as she dug the spoon into that creamy dessert again, then putting it near his lips, feeding him.

"That's how I got to know Helen" he said looking into her eyes and savoring that dessert, looking at the surprised and slightly quizzical expression in her eyes.

"Really?" It was the first word that found the way out of her lips.

He noticed the shadow that slightly darkened her eyes and he couldn't resist the temptation.

"Unlike you, I generally have sex even _without a formal date_ " he replied holding her gaze, but not holding back a laugh at the look in her eyes.

He watched her as she slightly bit her lip, not replying. He could almost hear the sound of the thoughts spinning in her mind. She was annoyed. She knew that he had had several women and that they often were occasional relationships, but it wasn't just that... and what "was" gave him a strange feeling... Because in the end it was obvious what it was... she was _jealous_...

House couldn't help but smile.

"I was joking, Cuddy!" He laughed as her gaze didn't change "It's not at all what you're thinking about" he added, staring at her as she stared back, again without replying.

"One night she brought me a home-made serving of this in a Tupperware" he said, looking at her as she twirled the spoon in the cream, however not taking it to her mouth "She had been a good friend..." he said, looking at her again and smiling slightly " And you weren't a good company at all! " He added, looking at her as she nodded and this time smiled in turn.

The waitress distracted them from that conversation. She placed another bottle of wine on the table and a spoon in front of House.

Cuddy watched him as he took a spoonful of _her_ dessert, smiling slightly as he still looked at his spoon, not at her. As if he was thinking about something.

 _... she'd say yes..._ Helen had told him that day ... and it hadn't been the first time ...

"What are you thinking about?" She asked, unable to smile as she watched him.

House looked up meeting her eyes.

"About..." he shook his head slightly and hesitated ... "well... she was even worse than Wilson! She kept telling me that I had to see myself while I was with you..." he said, avoiding her gaze and then looking up into her eyes.

 _And that I looked at you as if there was anything else in the world ..._ he added to himself, without giving voice to that thought.

"I used to reply saying her that she was a crazy old woman" he said, laughing, playing down that moment "... and she replied with an 'you're an idiot'!" He added, laughing again.

Cuddy couldn't help but smile and nodded as if to say _'well, she really knows you very well then!'_ , biting her lip at the same time.

House watched her as she looked away in turn, then letting out a half-laugh, this time shaking her head. And he continued to watch her until he met her eyes again.

"Do you remember that Don Herrick?" She said looking into his eyes "That guy on Valentine's Day ..." she pointed out as if she had some doubts about whether he could remember him.

House didn't move and just looked at her. _Of course he remembered that guy! The Shriner with the hair parted on the left!_

"Well..." she continued, slightly shaking her head and smiling slightly "... that night, he practically told me the same"

"That you're an idiot?" He said, smiling mischievously and looking into her eyes.

"No, _you idiot_ " she laughed deliberately stressing the word _idiot_ and reaching for his hand on the table, then lacing her fingers with his.

He clasped her hand in his and stroked her fingers with his thumb. And again he longed that those three words could find the way out of his lips.

 _Fuck, Greg! Why is it so difficult? What are you so afraid of?_

He knew that gestures counted more than words... but ... she had told him she loved him... he couldn't do it... why was it so difficult to talk about his feelings?

He caressed her hand again looking at her as she smiled. He had no doubt... Maybe he wasn't able to find the gut to say it out aloud, but... he loved her... he couldn't call in any other way that he felt for her... Being with her made him feel alive... and complete... for the first time in his life. And that feeling was even stronger than sex.

"... _mahal kita_..." He said, looking his own thumb stroking her hand and then looking up at her. *

Cuddy smiled, slightly bending her head to the side without taking her eyes from him.

"What?" She asked, smiling and stroking his hand in turn.

House smiled, lightly biting his lip.

"I said that..." he hesitated, looking into her eyes and shaking his head slightly "... that... it's right... I'm really an idiot!" he said, taking her hand near her mouth and touching it with his lips in a chaste kiss.

...

He kissed the side of her neck letting his stubble tickling her bare skin. He liked the way in which she tilted her head back in response to his kisses. They haven't had sex yet, but that gesture in itself was a sign of complicity.

He moved his hand from her shoulder to her waist, wrapping her body with his arm and then resting his hand on her hip, just stroking her with circular movements of his thumb.

He could feel her smile even if he couldn't see it. And he smiled back as she tilted back her head more, toward him, stroking his stubble and neck with her hand.

They stayed like that... while seconds became minutes... just listening to the sound of the waves against the beach and of the light wind through the palm leaves, mixing just with the sound of their breathing.

"When did it happen?" He asked on her neck, breaking the silence.

"Happened what?" She replied without moving an inch continuing to stroke his neck.

House didn't answer. He heard her sighing slightly and her hand stopped.

"Er... almost five months ago" she said still looking in front of her.

House didn't answer, but he just held her tighter, wrapping her body with both arms and kissing her temple before resting his chin on the top of her head.

"How happened that I didn't notice it?" He said, kissing her hair. A small laugh escaped her lips and she wrapped his arms more around her own body.

"You're not infallible, Dr. House" she said savoring the feeling of his lips that kissed her hair again.

"So did you ... give up?" He asked "... with in-vitro?"

She replied just with a shrug.

"Er... I'm fine like this" she said "... and... satisfying my ego wasn't a good reason to have a child" she added, shaking her head slightly.

She turned to him, putting her arms around his neck.

"Anyway... really ... I'm fine... and I'll settle for taking care of a 45-year-old boy" she said with a smile touching his lips.

House brushed her lips in turn, however, looking at her with a mischievous look.

"Who was he?" He asked failing to hold that question back "Please, tell me it was not that guy I met in your office! You wouldn't even get a ride from an idiot like that. Least at all a child!" He said touching her lips with his tongue as she smiled.

"I wasn't looking for a ride, House" she said laughing, still staring at him but deliberately not answering his question "Anyway... a quasi infectious-disease specialist and... musician ... you have to admit he was _promising_... " she said, raising an eyebrow and teasing him.

"Promising?" He replied, raising both his eyebrows and looking into her eyes, smiling back "The only word fitting for that guy was _'embarrassing'_ , Cuddy! A woman like you doesn't know what to do with the losers swimmers of an _embarrassing maybe-future-infectious disease specialist who probably barely plunk away on Mozart's score_! Not when you can have those of a _brilliant infectious disease specialist that can play Mozart with closed eyes_ , Cuddy!" He said watching as she looked away unable not to smile.

" _Those of a_...?" She repeated, then laughing and not finishing the sentence, gently shaking her head before looking at him in the eye again.

"Well, sooner or later I hope definitely yes! Actually _sooner_ rather than later... and possibly not in a cup!" He added, laughing in turn watching her as she laughed, biting her lip.

 _Holy God!_ ... Had he really said what he just said? He hadn't even said _'I love you'_ yet, but he had said her _what he just said_? How many interpretations could be given to those words, except the one coming to her mind?

"Er... so ... aren't you for safe sex, Dr. House?" She said, smiling maliciously, deliberately leaving that conversation on a very light level.

"I'm a specialist in infectious diseases, Cuddy" he replied looking at her straight in the eyes, once again not directly answering her question.

Does it mean that he used to have safe sex...but he didn't want to have it that way _with her_?

He looked into her eyes as she analyzed those words without looking away from his eyes, and he couldn't help but not running his tongue on his lips as a smile appeared on those same lips.

"You can't give up, Cuddy..." he said, raising both eyebrows with a very mischievous look "... if you haven't tried some _best-quality raw material_ first" he said sucking her bottom lip.

Cuddy couldn't help but letting out another laugh.

" _Raw material_?" She repeated, laughing, looking at him in the eye "Er... yours?" She asked still smiling, with a challenging look.

"Wanna bet?" He replied with the same look, sucking her lip more.

Cuddy laughed again, shaking her head slightly.

"You're not serious," she laughed, closing her eyes to the shiver that ran down to her belly to the feeling of his mouth on hers "and... I don't know if winning this kind of bet is a good thing for you" she added, looking at him again.

"Maybe, _it is_ , Cuddy" He replied holding her gaze and stressing that _it is_...

 _Was he serious?_ Was he _really_ serious? Had he really just told her that he wanted to have a child with her? He might not have told her that ' _I love you'_ yet, but... _God!_ ... what he had just said was an ' _I love you'_ screamed on top of his lungs.

House watched as she bit her lip.

"Well... when you decide to give up the only 100% effective contraception" he said, smiling and biting her lip, taking back the conversation to a lighter level.

None had said her such a thing. Never. In none of her relationships she had never been even remotely close to that. How could she be listening to those words _now_? And...by House?

She had thought about having a baby _from_ him... she was going to ask him that evening in his office... but ... having a baby _with_ him... it was completely different...

And _he_ was completely different. Completely different but yet the same. Only House could tell her that he wanted a baby with her without ever using the word _baby_. Only House could tell her ' _I love you'_ without using the words _'I love you'._ With him it was like playing an endless _Taboo_.

She smiled, touching his lips in turn, stroking the hair on his nape.

The last thing she wanted was that being just a _game_... A couple of months ago she would have thought that was just one of his many ways to have sex with her. Not now. But... it was too early. She wanted to let herself go to irrationality. She wanted to let herself go in his arms. She wanted to let herself go, and at the same time she didn't... because it seemed so real... and yet so unreal...

Her eyes got lost in his. It was too early. Too early for that question. Too early for that answer. She touched his lips again and found his mouth more, letting those words hanging and getting lost in that kiss. Slow and deep... like what was between them.

* * *

 **Note:**

 _* Actually "mahal kita" means "I love you" ;)_


	15. Yes

_Here I am again! Well... OOC House or IC House? We are in a dilemma..._

 _Enjoy!_

* * *

 ** _..._**

 **Chapter 15 - Yes**

 **...**

* * *

"Here, Madam" The laundry girl said, putting a couple of clean and neatly folded shirts in a paper bag and handing it to Cuddy.

Cuddy thanked her, greeting her with a nod and turning to House who stood in the doorway, leaning with his back against the doorframe.

"Mrs. House?"

She met his gaze before turning back to the girl behind the counter.

"Your key, Madam" she said handing her the room key she had forgot on the counter.

House looked at her as she thanked her again, smiling and putting the key in her purse. And he couldn't avoid running his tongue on his lips, slightly smiling as she looked up at him.

"So... ready to be a free woman again, _Mrs. House_?" He asked, staring at her as she approached him.

"I'll be back just _Dr. Cuddy_ ," she said, smiling and taking his hand "but... I really hope I'm not going to be _free_ ," she added, still smiling, looking into his eyes and biting her lip, lacing her fingers with his.

House pulled her to him, wrapping her waist with his arm but not letting go of her hand, gently kissing her on the lips.

"You'll have to find a better way to get rid of me than firing me, Dr. Cuddy," he said pausing a moment on her lips before letting her go.

She just smiled, taking off her shoes as they walked on the beach toward their bungalow. The paper bag and her shoes in one hand, his hand clasped in the other one. House turned his head toward her, looking at her in the dim light, and pulled her to him again, this time letting her hand go and wrapping her back, first with one arm and then with both of them.

And he watched her as she lifted her head to meet his gaze. He liked that feeling. The feeling of her body in his arms. The towered her at least a hand width. More when she wore no heels. And it was a strange feeling. The awareness of how small she was in his arms. Something that he rarely noticed in hospital. She could stand up to him. Always. And certainly she was never intimidated by those 8 inches or by the fact that he was almost twice her pounds.

He found her lips, and then her tongue.

"I don't want to go back home" she whispered on his lips, looking into his eyes despite the dim light "I don't want this to end..."

House didn't answer, just finding her lips again, slightly biting on her bottom lip and then brushing her lips with his, not really kissing her.

"Then make sure it's not gonna end" he whispered on her lips, looking at her as she looked up again meeting his piercing gaze.

Cuddy didn't answer, analyzing those words.

"I'm not going to end this story, House..." She said, feeling his arms holding her closer.

"But you're afraid... You wonder how going back to daily life will be..." he said looking into her eyes.

"I'm not afraid," she replied smiling slightly "... I already know how it will be," she said, raising an eyebrow and giving him a half mock glare, "I just hope..." she hesitated slightly biting her lip and smiling "you'll be there to hold me at night after having driven me crazy all day" she said, smiling and brushing in turn her lips on his.

"I hope _to drive you crazy_ even at night, Cuddy," he said, raising an eyebrow with a mischievous gaze, looking at her as she smiled and nodded.

He found her lips more, brushing her tongue, but again not deepening the kiss.

"Say yes," he whispered on her lips so imperceptibly that she wasn't sure she had heard him correctly.

"Yes?" She asked with a quizzical look.

House nodded, again touching her lips.

"Without the interrogative form" he said, looking at her as she smiled slightly and looked away for a moment before looking at him again.

"Er... I'm not sure I know what we're talking about," she said looking into his eyes.

"You are" he said looking into her eyes.

His gaze dispelled her doubts. And the smile on her lips too. She knew what he was talking about... just ... she couldn't believe they were talking about that. In the last few days he had said her _' love you'_ in every possible way... _without ever using those three words..._ This was House... but what he was talking about right now was... _what was it?_

"Stay my wife" he said, looking at her as she bit her lip.

"House..." she said, looking into his eyes, "I know you don't like changes, but..." she looked away, shaking her head slightly.

"I know what I feel, Cuddy," he said lifting her chin to make her looking into his eyes "I'm not being irrational" he pointed out, staring at her "I'm very rational. _Irrational_ is... what I feel for you. What I've been feeling for almost twenty years. _Irrational_ is still wanting to deny it. _Irrational_ is... let _this_ end... "

"House... I'm not going to let this..." she said as he didn't give her time to go on.

"Want you know why I haven't said you that ' _I love you'_ yet?" He said still staring at her "Not because I don't love you," he said, looking at her lip tight among her teeth and lightly touching it with his thumb before looking up into her eyes. "Did you ever have a panic attack, Cuddy?" He asked without expecting an answer and without waiting for an answer from her "The feeling of not being able to breathe? I did. On that flight, Lisa," he said using her first name maybe for the first time in twenty years. "... _irrational_ was not being able to leave that room... not feeling the need to eat... sleep... not feeling anything but the fear of losing you... "

"This is _irrational_ , Cuddy. What I feel is _irrational_. And this is why I can't say you that ' _I love you'_. Because... I already said _'I love you'_ to a woman... and it wasn't this. It wasn't what I feel now. "

"Those three words aren't enough at all," he said looking into her eyes "You want more. I don't know what that _'more'_ isfor you but ... you... you're my _'more'..._ "

"I never proposed to a woman. I never even thought about doing it. I never even thought I could do it! Never thought I could have wanted a woman so much to want her to be mine. But that's what I want right now, Cuddy. "

"I know how it's like to be _without you_... and I know how it's like to be _with you_ ... so... I'm perfectly rational... I want you. Tomorrow. And the day after. And the day after that."

"Stay my wife" he repeated on her lips.

"House... I..." she whispered, looking away "... I don't know..." she said, lightly shaking her head and slightly loosening the grip of her arms around his neck "I want you. And I know I'll want you tomorrow and the day after and the day after that like I wanted you yesterday, and the day before... and the one before that... but... I don't... I don't know... you can't ask me to be your wife... _like this_ "

"...' _Like this' how_ , Cuddy?" He said seriously still staring at her but in turn slightly loosening the grip of his arms around her body "... Without hearts and... flowers... and diamonds...?"

"No." She answered, "Er...yes. Uhm... I don't know... it's just that... being husband and wife is..."

"It's... _what_? Supporting each other? Someone who can make you laugh when you just want to cry? In sickness and health? For better or for worse?" He said, looking straight into her eyes. His gaze harder than he would have wanted.

She couldn't help but bit more on her bottom lip as she stared back at him... she didn't want to hurt him, but... he was asking her an impulsiveness that wasn't part of her... least at all of _him_...

"House... we've been together just for..."

"I know _since_ we've been together Cuddy," He said dryly, not letting her finish that sentence. "You know me. And I know you. I'm an asshole. And I'll still be that asshole. The same one you..."

"... the same one I fell in love with" she said, smiling slightly and finishing that sentence for him.

He watched her as she slightly bit her lip again. And he stroked her back with both hands, looking into her eyes and slowly moving his hands from her shoulders to her lower back, and then again from her back to her shoulders, caressing her neck and then taking her face with both hands.

"... Those three words aren't really enough" he said, stroking her cheekbone with his thumb and then brushing her lips with his finger, looking at his own finger and not at her eyes.

She met his eyes just for an instant before his lips brushed against her forehead in a light kiss.

... _Say yes_... he whispered on her skin without looking into her eyes, still stroking her cheekbone with his thumb, before stepping back. He met her eyes just for a split second before turning around and walking away, climbing the few wooden steps toward their bungalow door.

She stood still, just watching him as he turned the key in the lock and opened the door, then disappearing beyond that same door, without turning back. Motionless. As if time had stopped, while that ' _say yes'_ still spun and swirled in her mind.

...

* * *

He was asleep when she entered their bedroom. Or maybe not. Perhaps he was just faking it... but he didn't move as she took off her dress, then putting on one of his T-shirts, once again using it as a pajamas.

She looked at his back as he slept facing the window, not her. She looked at the empty space beside him. _Her_ place. That was where she wanted to be. That night and all those to come. And that was _the problem_. That was what scared her the most. Where was her rationality? She wanted to say yes. She wanted to say him _that yes_. But she was afraid. Not of him. Of herself. She was held back by her rational side, but the truth was that she wanted to be his wife. She wanted a baby from him and _with_ him. She wanted to be his. And this... this was _not rational_.

She stood there, just listening to his breathing. She really wanted to be able to trust her instincts. She wanted this man. The man who more than anyone else could upset her... and make her laugh. The man who more than anyone else could get her uncomfortable... and comfortable.

 _"...'Like this' how, Cuddy?" He had said her "... Without hearts and... flowers... and diamonds...?"_

No. Not _'like this'_ like _'without flowers and diamonds'_ ... Flowers and diamonds were the last things she cared about. He wasn't the man who gave flowers. He wasn't the man who kneels to ask for a woman's hand in marriage. She meant... _offhand_... _off the cuff_... when they have been dating for a few days ... when they hadn't gone beyond kisses and caresses yet... But... that was House. That was decidedly House. Switching from a joke to a serious talk and then again to a joke. If she ever thought that man could propose marriage... well... she would imagine it like this. No... she would have expected anything different from him. But certainly she wasn't expecting it... now.

She hesitated, still standing in the middle of the room, considering whether it was better to sleep in her own bed that night or not... but... sleeping alone was the last thing she wanted at that moment. She hadn't answered his question, but she knew what her place was. That one was the only place in which she wanted to be. And that one was the only man she wanted next to her. Their relationship wasn't _ordinary_. House wasn't _ordinary_. It was the most _extraordinary_ man she had ever known. In all facets of that word. And certainly in the very literal sense of that word _._ _Extra ordinary._ And being _out of the ordinary_ was what made him _extraordinary_.

She approached the bed, watching him sleeping in the dim light of that room, lit only by the moon light coming from the window.

She started as soon as she felt his hand wrap her legs, suddenly pulling her on the bed while a _'Geez, House!'_ escaped from her lips.

She slapped his arm, not holding back a laugh as her heart pounded in her chest.

"Shit, you gave me a heart attack. I thought you were asleep." She laughed as she could feel his body near hers and his mouth just a millimeter from hers.

"To give you a good excuse to not answer my question?" He said, smiling on her lips "No, Cuddy!" He laughed again.

 _Wasn't he angry?_ Because of her _no_... that, well, actually it wasn't a _no_... but anyway it wasn't an answer yet, and...

He gave her no time to thought about that. His tongue found hers and immediately dissolved every thought, replacing it just with an ancestral need of him.

"Oh God..." she sighed, tilting her head back and failing to hold back a moan as soon as he sucked her neck "... God, House... please, no... you can't do this to me" she whispered, smiling, clutching his hair in her hands, while her mouth said _no_ , and her body _yes_.

He slid his hand down her body, brushing with his thumb the side of her breast through the shirt and hearing her sigh again.

"You know I can make you _scream_ that _yes_ , don't you?" He whispered in her ear, sending a shiver in her most intimate part.

 _God... of course she knew!_ And the feeling of his partial erection against her thigh made immediately contract the muscles in her lower abdomen.

He felt her tighten her thighs against each other in response to that feeling and responded by slipping his hand lower, caressing her knee and then moving up along her inner thigh, just touching her with his fingertips, and just for a few inches.

"House... please..."

He found her mouth again and teased her lips with his tongue.

"You're trying to turn rational what is irrational, Cuddy," he said, smiling on her lips "This is the only part of you saying _no_ " he said, kissing her mouth and seeking her tongue.

God... how could just the feeling of his tongue into her mouth have such a power over her? And better for her that he didn't know what her mouth would have wanted to do at that moment.

She felt his hand still stroking her leg, then moving up on her hip and on her waist and then on her arm. His fingers moved slowly from her shoulder to her forearm as his lips didn't leave hers.

"You're the most complicated woman I've ever known" he whispered with a smile on her lips, finding her hand.

Cuddy smiled, intertwining her fingers with his.

"You are the most unpredictable man I've ever known" she replied, still brushing his lips, without leaving his hand.

He kissed her lips again, then rolling her by back. Her back against his chest as he wrapped her body with his arm, still kissing the side of her neck, but letting tenderness replace passion.

"Just tell me you won't make me wait another twenty years" he laughed, sucking her earlobe.

She opened her mouth to reply but gave a start at that feeling. And started even more as that movement pressed her backside more against his erection, his arm still holding her close to him.

"God, House... you're torturing me" she whispered, trying not to think about that feeling.

"Oh... me?" He replied, laughing and biting her earlobe again "Sleep! Or those twenty years will become just twenty seconds, Cuddy."

Cuddy laughed in turn, stroking his arm wrapped around her body.

"So?" She asked in a deliberately mischievous tone, turning her head toward him, trying to look into his eyes "What do you want more? Me being your wife? Or having sex with me, House?"

She heard him laugh as his arm clutched her body even more.

"Having sex," he said on her lips "with my wife" he added, looking for her lips again.

* * *

...

...

So? What can I say... For him things are just white or black! And I like him like this. What about you?


	16. Back to reality

**Chapter 16 - Back to reality**

 **...**

* * *

"Welcome aboard Mr. House," the flight attendant said, checking his ticket and smiling "please, seat 4A. It's right here" she said gesturing toward the seat on her right, then looking at Cuddy and taking the ticket from her hands.

"Mrs. Cuddy. Welcome," she said smiling again "please, seat 4B" she said pointing to the seat next to House's.

Cuddy smiled as soon as she met House's gaze.

"Haven't you sent me in second class this time?" She said looking into his eyes.

"So a fat guy can drool on your shoulder pretending to sleep as he instead looks into your neckline?" He said, staring slyly at her and gesturing her to sit in his seat, by the window.

"So... are you trapping me here?" She asked holding his gaze, raising an eyebrow as she passed near him, then sitting down in that seat, still looking at him as he held her gaze in turn, then sitting down next to her, really trapping her between himself and the window.

"I'm on vacation, Cuddy! Don't make me work on this flight either!" He said, raising an eyebrow in turn "Don't move from here. Don't even breathe. At least until I'll have an answer to that _offer you can't refuse_ " he said, staring at her, and using his best Sicilian accent on those last four words.

Cuddy couldn't help but laugh.

" _Don't even breathe_ , _Don Vito Corleone_?" She asked smiling, watching him as he smiled in turn "I don't think I can hold my breath for 18 hours" she added, looking into his eyes as he ran his tongue on his lips.

"Sure?" He asked, looking slyly into her eyes before moving his gaze on her lips and then again in her eyes, seeing her smiling more as she let his lips found hers.

...

A 18 hours flight. Plus a four hours stopover in China. A total of 22 hours on a seat with just a seat-toilet walking to stretch his leg. Yet his leg wasn't complaining that much. Maybe part of his pain really had a psychological component.

"You okay?" Cuddy asked, opening her eyes and lifting her head from his shoulder, watching him as he rubbed his leg, actually more out of habit than necessity, in turn putting a hand on his leg, lightly massaging him.

He answered just with a nod, then turning his head to look at her and kissing her hair as she rested her head on his shoulder again and the bright signal in front of them warned them to buckle up their seat belt for landing.

...

House looked at her as she walked toward the exit pulling her trolley, and settled his bag on his shoulder before taking her hand, drawing her to him. Their vacation ended there. Beyond that door there was life exactly as they had left it before that break changed it completely. Beyond that door there was Wilson, waiting for them. They had tried to dissuade him in every way, but they had failed to convince him to wait for them at home. And that meant that beyond that door they would have come back to be who they had always been. For now their relationship was just for them. Wilson was a good friend, but going back to reality would have been difficult enough, even without someone who, with all the good faith of the world, gave advice and opinions.

He held her in his arms slightly looking for her lips.

"I'll miss you tonight" she whispered on his lips as he smiled.

He slightly bit on her lip then tenderly kissing her on the lips again before she took his hand, walking toward that green and white _EXIT_. And he felt her hand leaving his as soon as she walked through that door. _'Me, too'_ he said in his mind as he followed her through that same door.

* * *

 _Princeton-Plaisboro Teaching Hospital._ Less than a week later that month and a half in the Philippines seemed so far that she could almost think that it never happened.

 _Almost..._

"God!"

She gave a start as soon as a hand suddenly took hers, pulling her into the closet on the second floor.

"Hou..."

And her attempt to complain about that _assault_ vanished into his mouth, replaced by a moan as his tongue invaded her mouth and his body pressed hers against the wall.

She smiled as she parted from his lips, putting her arms around his neck and kissing him on the lips more lightly.

"Abstinence crisis?" She asked, raising an eyebrow with a mischievous look.

"Like I said, Cuddy," he replied on her lips sucking on her bottom lip "I replaced an addiction with a new one"

She smiled and found his lips again.

"I have to go..." she said with a guilty look parting again from his lips but still stroking the hair on his nape.

"See you _by chance_ at the cafeteria? Um... at one o'clock?" He asked still pressing her against the wall.

Cuddy nodded, lightly kissing him on the lips again as he let go of her. She opened the closet door, hoping none would see her walking out of a broom closet.

 _But... how many chances did she have to evade Murphy's Law?_

She immediately met Wilson's look down the hallway and turned to House, who looked at her with a questioning look.

"I DON'T CARE, HOUSE" She shouted in her best bossy tone "I WANT YOU IN THE CLINIC IN TWO MINUTES! OR I SWEAR YOU'LL BE THERE 'TIL CHRISTMAS!"

House looked at her with an amused look, running his tongue on his lips. She held his gaze, however biting her lip to keep from smiling before turning back and walking away, passing near Wilson and giving him only an annoyed look as she met his gaze.

Wilson glared at House while he walked out of the closet closing the door behind him, and then turned his head to look at Cuddy again, looking at the slight sway of her hips as the ticking of her heels echoed in the hallway.

...

"Don't you think House is being... um ...a little _weird_?" Wilson asked turning his head to look at Cuddy.

"Weird?" She repeated, looking into his eyes as she walked beside him.

Wilson didn't reply, just holding her gaze and probably studying her reaction.

Cuddy shook her head, more in a disconsolate way than as saying no.

"If with ' _being weird'_ you mean that in less than a week I had already been at Human Resources twice and I just skipped lunch to talk with the husband of his patient to convince him not to press charges... well... yes, Wilson, he's being _weird_ " she said looking at him with an exasperated look.

Wilson slightly smiled and nodded as if to say... _yes, actually you're right_...

"Forget it, Cuddy!" He said, smiling slightly and shrugging "House is House" he added, shaking his head and walking toward the elevator as instead she stopped in front of her office door.

She couldn't help but smile as she approached her desk.

"Yeah... House is House" She repeated looking at the plastic bowl in front of herself.

 _Egg salad._

She couldn't help but smile more as her fingers touched the few words written by his handwriting on the post-it stuck on the plastic bowl top.

 _* I checked. No chicks! ;-) *_

 _..._

"Thank you" she whispered putting her arms around his neck and slightly brushing his lips.

"For having got to your hospital yet another charge, boss?" He asked, raising an eyebrow but touching her lips with his.

Cuddy smiled and shook her head looking into his eyes.

"You're still grounded for that" she said giving him a mock glare but brushing his tongue with hers.

House held her even tighter into his arms sliding his hands from her shoulder to her lower back, resting his hands on her buttocks and pulling her closer to him, making her close her eyes to that feeling.

"Isn't this enough as a punishment?" He asked maliciously, making her aware of his erection.

"Play nice... and we'll talk again about that" she said on his lips with the same tone, however not moving an inch from that position, savoring the feeling of his body against hers.

"Nice like _hearts-flowers-diamonds_ , Cuddy?" He asked, raising both eyebrows.

"Nice lik..."

She didn't finish that sentence as his tongue invaded her mouth in a long kiss.

* * *

His stubble tickled the side of her neck, but not enough to wake her up from the torpor in which she was. She heard just two of the words he whispered in her ear... _hospital_... and _patient_... but she didn't move, not even an inch, and only a _hhhmmm_ came from her lips.

House smiled, kissing her neck again. She slept so deeply that she hadn't even hear the ring of his phone. And that _hhhmmm_ could easily be just a simple automated response to the feeling of his lips on her neck. He wasn't sure she had really heard his words.

...

Cuddy woke up to the sound of the alarm, turning it off without opening her eyes and reaching for House, without finding him. She opened her eyes, only to have confirmation that he was really no longer beside her. He was never the first one to get up... and she turned her head toward the alarm clock, unable to hold back a smile.

A post-it.

 _* Hospital. Sweet dreams Sleeping Beauty.*_

It was strange waking up alone... after almost two months she was so used having him around that she really missed him.

She buttoned her blouse as she entered the kitchen then glaring at the table. An empty cup of what probably was coffee and an empty bowl. A spoon still in the bowl and his Cheerios box next to the bowl. What was left of his breakfast. Why was it so hard to put them in the sink? She didn't demand that he washed them! Finding them in the sink would have been enough! Yeah, right... this was his kitchen... but it made no difference, right?

But again she couldn't help but smile. Another bowl was on the table and a spoon had been placed on a paper towel next to the bowl. And another post-it was stuck to the Cheerios box.

 _* Rings for you! Enough for that yes? *_

She smiled, biting her lip. Only House could revive that proposal on a post-it with a bowl of honey rings.

# Diamond rings are overrated. I love honey rings. And I love you # She texted him then pressing the enter key, sitting down at the table and taking the box, watching those colored rings filling her bowl.

Deep down she had feared that coming back to reality would have mixed thing up in their relationship. A wonderful holiday was one thing... every day routine was something else... With him it was like living with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Or better... _Dr. Hide and Mr. Jekyll_... Cynical and exasperating at work... incredible among those four walls... And the fact that she hadn't given him an answer yet, didn't mean she didn't know what her answer was.

She smiled at the _beep_ of her phone. And even more as soon as she read House's reply to her text. In his classic and unmistakable style.

 _# Me too. And... normality is overrated,_ honey _#_

Yes, she _knew_ what her answer was.

* * *

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Dr. Hide and Mr Jekyll.. House and Greg. And the best part was that she loved them both.

 _Exasperating and yet... funny._

 _Unreliable and at the same time... reliable._

 _Irritating and... exciting._

She loved both those sides of him. She could bring out the best and the worst of her. And it had always been like that. Every time she thought he couldn't take her aback anymore he did something that left her literally speechless.

And that was one of those moments.

She looked at the book resting on her desk. A collection of short stories by _Charles Bukowski_. _The most beautiful woman in town_ _and other stories_.

And again a post-it.

 _* It reminds me of you *_

She bit her lip to that note, and touched the cover with her fingers. _The most beautiful woman in town..._

She turned that book in her hands continuing to bite her lip.

A book. And what at first sight look like a compliment. But... it was _Bukowski._ She didn't know Bukowski very well, she had never read one of his book... just some passage and a few reviews... but she knew enough about him to know that wasn't really what could be defined as her kind of literature. He was famous for his _Tales of Ordinary Madness_... sex, alcohol, drugs... a raw and rough style... and... well, _his_ women weren't really good and _serious_ women. Then... no. _Making her a compliment_ wasn't the reason why he had chosen to give her that book precisely. And House wasn't banal. Ever. So... why? Why precisely that book?

She distractedly opened the book and looked at the first page, reading a few lines.

 _... Cass... to the she was simply a sex machine..._

Sure enough! And then again... why that book? Because of madness? That was a recurring theme in Bukowski's stories and...

The whirlwind of thoughts in her mind stopped as soon as she heard her office door opening, and looked up, meeting House's eyes. She placed the book back on the desk and turned the post-it between her hands as she approached him, then putting his arms around her neck, running her tongue on her lips and looking at him straight in the eye while he rested his hands on her hips.

"I don't know if I have to thank you for that," she said, nodding toward the book on her desk and then looking again into his eyes, unable to prevent the corners of her mouth from curling into a slight smile "That _Cass_... is she a prostitute?"

She stared at him as he slightly tilted his head from side to side in a sort of _more or less_.

"And does she remind you of me?" She asked with a serious gaze, this time raising both eyebrows and looking at him straight in the eye, running her tongue on her lips again.

"Never stop at appearances, Cuddy!" He said, staring at her as her look softened slightly at those words "... and anyway... she's even crazy" he pointed out tightening more the grip of his arms around her body, still staring at her.

"Then, am I crazy?" She said, still staring at him while a smile, however, appeared on her lips.

"You're my girlfriend, Cuddy!" He said seeing her smile growing larger and watching her as her eyes moved from his eyes to his lips and she got on tiptoe, then brushing his lips.

"Right" she whispered on his lips with a smile, then lightly looking for his tongue.

 _Right... She was crazy. A crazy as him... indeed, crazy for him..._

"Do you really have to go out with Wilson tonight?" She asked, stroking his neck, her fingers lingering on the hem of the neckline of his shirt and then sliding through his hair.

She watched him as he nodded and kissed her again on the lips.

"Ok," she said, slightly pouting and looking at him as he smiled.

"I leave you in Bukowski's company" he said, still smiling, holding her tighter into his arms "Make good use of it tonight" he added, looking into her eyes, then lightly kissing her on the lips again.

Cuddy looked at him as he walked out of her office closing the door, and reached for the book again, turning it in her hands. _Bukowski's company_. She sighed, again leafing through the pages . _Never stop at appearances, Cuddy!_ He told her. What was it beyond appearance? Certainly that fitted him perfectly. Her _Dr. Hide_. With House there was never just one interpretation. Did even that gift go beyond appearances? Beyond a banal compliment and an ironic hint at how crazy she was to be together with him?

Yes. When she least expected it, that man really knew how to literally leave her speechless.

Page 8. Two lines, underlined in pencil.

... _Then I held Cass and we slept together_ _about an_ _hour_. _It was somehow better_ _than_ _lovemaking..._

She couldn't help but smile, biting her lip for preventing it from trembling, as the tip of her finger touched that line and that _'it reminds me of you'_ turned in her mind.

She leafed through the pages of the book again. No other notes. But she couldn't help but smile more as soon as her eyes focused on the key fixed with adhesive tape on the last page of that book. His apartment key. _Make good use of it tonight..._

 _Yes, I'm crazy... I'm crazy for you..._ she whispered within the four walls of her office.

* * *

...

...

 **Author's note:** For the ones who are having an allergic skin rash because of that 'Honey', I just want to reassure you. It's a OOC House, but not that much. He was just playing on words. ;)


	17. Hearts, diamonds and flowers

**Chapter 17 - Hearts, diamonds and flowers**

 **...**

* * *

It was late. More than he thought. He turned the key in the lock and opened the door, smiling to himself at the view of the TV on. The volume so low that it was just a buzz in the background. He looked at the cup resting on the coffee table. Next to the book he had given her. The tea bag still in the cup immersed in what was left of that now cold drink. He brought it to his lips and smiled. How long didn't he take a sip of chamomile? Certainly she hadn't found it in his kitchen. And again he smiled at the thought of how her stuff were already slowly mixing with his in that apartment.

He sat down beside her on the couch moving a lock of hair from her face and bending down to brush her cheek with his lips.

She moved to that contact, lazily opening her eyes and smiling slightly.

"I'm not going to carry you to bed" he said smiling on her lips.

She replied just with a _hhhmmm,_ clinging to him and burying her face in the crook of his neck.

 _God! He would have wanted to make love to her right now and then, on that couch!_ He had no doubt he could wake her up! _Where had she got that unhealthy idea of waiting! Waiting for... what?_

"Come on," he said, smiling, standing up and reaching for her.

He took her hand, leading her to the bedroom. He wasn't completely convinced she really was awake! He slipped under the covers with her pulling her closer until her back leaned on his chest.

"Thank you... for the book" she whispered wrapping more his arm around her own body.

House smiled, just kissing her hair.

"Is..." she slightly turned her head back to look into his eyes " _is it better than making love_?" She whispered smiling with a sleepy but definitely mischievous look brushing his lips.

"It says _somehow_ , Cuddy!" He replied smiling on her lips with a mischievous look, caressing her lips with his while his arm held her tighter to himself.

She stared back, lightly running her tongue on her lips, then looking again for his lips.

"Right!" She replied , still smiling on his lips " _Somehow._.."

* * *

Definitely! When she least expected it, that man really knew how leaving her speechless! Literally! And not always in a positive way!

...

"Dr. Cuddy?"

Cuddy looked up from the paper on her desk, meeting her assistant's eyes, standing in the doorframe.

"A supplier..." she said, looking at Cuddy as she gestured her to come in "He says he has an appointment for a delivery, but his name isn't on my agenda..."

"Um... ok... let him in" she said, standing up and slightly shaking her head.

She looked at that guy as he entered her office pushing a hand-cart with five styrofoam boxes stacked on each other, and shook his hand as he handed her the delivery note for a signature.

"50 pieces, Ma'am," He said handing her even his pen "as ordered"

Cuddy looked at him, looking down at that paper sheet and then up at him again.

"Fifty?" She asked with a quizzical look as her gaze lingered on the writing on his T-shirt.

It had been a very difficult and busy week, but... for sure she hadn't signed for any order for... _something_... from _"There's something about... pork."_ And she had confirmation of that as soon as she looked at the signature on that order. An unmistakable incline of those L and Y. And she sighed, looking at that man again.

"Fresh. Arrived this morning! With us only the best stuff, Ma'am," he said with a satisfied look, opening one of the boxes to show her the content.

Cuddy closed her eyes for a split second, deeply breathing in, more to conceal her anger than because she was disgusted by that.

Ice and those which, by the size, were clearly beef hearts. Fifty beef hearts!

"Um... thanks," she said, scribbling her signature at the bottom of that paper, and then handing it again to that guy.

He smiled, shaking her hand again and greeting her with a nod.

Well... at least they weren't pork hearts... she thought shaking her head, looking at those styrofoam boxes again and then at the logo on the back of that man's T-shirt as he move toward the door.

"Oh... wait a minute" he said, suddenly stopping and turning back towards her, taking an envelope from his pocket.

He looked at her and handed her a crumpled note. Luckily he hadn't forgotten it! That guy would have split his cane on his head if he forgot! Not only he had paid the bill in advance, but had also given him $ 20 to deliver even that note!

Cuddy looked at him as this time he walked out of her office, closing the door and looking at those styrofoam boxes, running a hand on her forehead.

She opened the envelope and... she couldn't help but smile.

How on earth could he do that? She was furious! Yeah... she _was_. Past tense.

She shook her head

Again. Every time she thought she couldn't be more furious he did something that left her literally speechless. How did he do that? Dispelling her anger with a few words scrawled on a yellow note, turning it into a smile?

She looked again at those words, shaking her head.

 _* Hearts. Can I have that yes now? *_

* * *

"Still mad at me?" He asked, walking into her office and watching her as she looked up from her desk.

"Yes," she replied looking him straight in the eye.

House shook his head, unable to hold back a smile.

"Well," he said, shaking his head "not the kind of _yes_ I wanted to hear from your mouth" he added, looking into her eyes, running his tongue on his lips.

Cuddy couldn't help but smile in turn, biting her lip to not give in, and then running her tongue on her lips in turn.

"I can't marry you if I kill you with my bare hands first" she said glaring at him.

House placed both hands on her desk, bending over to look straight into her eyes.

"Why am I having the impression that your hands would like to do something else now than killing me?" He mischievously asked, just an inch from her mouth.

Cuddy held his gaze then unable to hold back a laugh. _God, how the hell could he do that?_ The warmth of his breath was enough to turn her on...

"Because... it's true" she replied, laughing, looking at him in the eyes and then looking at his lips.

 _God... she just wanted those lips on hers... that tongue on hers..._

She breathed in, biting her lip more as House moved in turn his gaze on her mouth.

"You're not angry" he said, still just one inch from her lips. Not a question. A statement.

"No," she answered smiling, slightly touching his lips in a little kiss, then suddenly parting from him and leaning her back on her armchair, glancing behind House, to the French-door of her office.

Her assistant knocked on the same door just a second later, approaching her desk and glancing at House as Cuddy signed the document she had brought her. The Dr. House in that office was nothing new. And it wasn't nothing new even that _he_ was often responsible for the mood of her boss and... well... at least this time he didn't seem to have got into some trouble.

House looked at her as she walked out, closing the door again, and then again at Cuddy.

"So may I not sleep alone tonight?" He asked, bending over on her desk again and lightly brushing her lips.

"Come over for dinner?" She asked him the hint of a smile.

"Are you going to cook? I thought you weren't mad at me" he replied looking at her with a raised eyebrow as she gave him a dirty look.

...

He had tried to lift the lid and peer into the pan, but Cuddy had been faster and had lightly slapped his hand with the wooden spoon, forcing him to pull back.

"Well... it looks good." He said as she put a plate in front of him and sat down on the other side of the table.

"I hope so... because I have another 49 in the freezer." She said seriously staring at him.

House stared back, slightly opening his mouth, looking at his dish again and then at her eyes.

"You're kidding" He said with the hint of a smile as a smile appeared on her lips too.

"Yes, silly" She replied, laughing. "It's filet"

House smiled and nodded, looking again at his plate.

"What happened to...?" He said, waving his hand and then sinking the knife in that fillet with green pepper sauce.

Cuddy laughed.

"Dr. Thompson's tomorrow anatomy practice class. You made him the happiest man in the world. So happy that he almost kissed me!" He said, laughing.

House glared at her.

"Better for him he didn't," He said looking into her eyes "or tomorrow his students would have make practice directly on his dead body"

Cuddy smiled and leaned over the table, touching his lips.

"I like when you're jealous," she said, still touching his lips.

He didn't answer but lightly bit her lip touching her tongue.

...

"It was really delicious, Cuddy," he said resting his fork on the plate and taking a sip of red wine "Did you really make that?" He asked, raising an eyebrow as she rolled her eyes.

"I don't see anyone else here" She said glaring at him.

"My mother would have said that you're a woman to get married to" he said looking up from his plate, meeting her gaze. "Oh, wait!" He said, "I've already proposed and you said no" he said as she rolled her eyes again, in turn placing her fork on the plate.

"I didn't say _no_ , House" She said, staring at him.

"But you didn't say _yes_ either" he replied, staring back at her.

Cuddy stood up and just bent over, lightly kissing him on the lips before taking his empty plate to put it in the sink. She just took a step back before his arm wrapped her waist drawing her to himself again, making her sit down on his knee and forcing her to place back the plate on the table, then looking for her mouth.

* * *

Another long day.

Cuddy parked the car in the driveway in front of her house. She hadn't hurried to come back home. Not tonight. She wasn't really in the mood for spending the night alone, but she obviously couldn't prevent him from spending the night with Wilson. If he skipped the usual poker night at his apartment, Wilson would certainly get suspicious. Poker. That was synonymous with cards and beer and whiskey. She couldn't go there. And certainly the last thing she wanted was him taking his bike to reach her in her bed in the middle of the night after having drunken.

 _"Then ...are you striking me out tonight?" she had said with a smile, looking around in his office to be sure none was there, before putting her arms around his neck._

 _"The only one still striking me_ out _is you" he replied encircling her waist with both hands and pulling her gently to him looking into her eyes with a mischievous look._

 _He had looked at her as she lightly bit her lip and smiled._

 _"Well ... I don't know what they say in these cases." She had said, still smiling and slightly brushing his lips, "I wish you a good_ hand _tonight"_

 _He couldn't hold back a laugh. Not for what she had just said. But for the way in which she had said that. For the look with which she had gave him on those words. Because something told him that she didn't meant only 'a good hand' in poker._

 _He had run his tongue on his lips and had bitten her lip slightly._

 _"I'll pretend it's yours" he whispered mischievously on her lips looking at her straight in the eye._

 _She hadn't replied._

She shook her head smiling as she thought back to those words, turning the key in the lock.

She hadn't replied. Not out loud. But she smiled at the thought of the _'... me too'_ ... that she had held back as his tongue looked for hers.

"What the hell...?"

Cuddy put both hands on her eyes as soon as she opened the door. Again failing to suppress a half smile as she picked up one of the many poker cards scattered on the floor along the hallway.

"God..." she whispered, shaking her head, turning the card in her hands and glancing at all the other ones on the floor.

Poker cards. _Hearts and Diamonds_... In a long trail up to her bedroom.

She turned that card in her hands again, biting her lip. A 'say yes' was handwritten on that card. And on all the other ones.

"God... you're really crazy" she whispered smiling as she picked them up from the ground one by one, then stopping on her bedroom door.

Again cards. Everywhere. Where the hell did he take all those cards! No Hearts and Diamonds this time. Clubs. Clubs scattered everywhere on the floor. And one resting on her pillow.

She smiled more, biting her lip, at the writing on the back of that card. A ten of clubs.

 _* They looks a bit like flowers, right? *_

"Yes," she whispered, shaking her head as she looked at that card, unable not to smile even more...

...

# You're a stolker #

House bit his lip in order to hold back a smile as he read her message, then looking at Wilson, sitting in front of him, and taking another sip of his beer straight from the bottle.

# Rings. Hearts. Diamonds. _Flowers_. At least you have no more excuses # he texted back quickly, glancing at Wilson and again at the display of his cell phone as it lit up again.

# Anyway, yes #

# That _yes_? # He texted quickly, oblivious about Wilson, who was looking at that texting with a very curious look.

# No. Yes, they looks like flowers # she replied, making him roll his eyes and lightly smile, while another message from Cuddy anticipated his reply.

# And you're crazy #

He glanced at Wilson again, then looking at the phone, resisting the temptation to reply with a _'of you'_ and instead just taking another sip of beer before texting back.

# That's something you already knew #

# Yes #

# That _yes_? # He quickly texted again just to continue to tease her.

# No # she replied, as the corners of his lips curled in another half smile.

He ran his tongue on his lips as the phone screen lit up again.

# But I love you, stolker. Good night #

He hadn't text back. She had double-checked her phone several times, but he hadn't text back. Probably not to get Wilson too much suspicious.

She had just turned off the light when the phone beeps made her reach for it on her bedside table, without turning the light on.

# Lisa... #

 _Lisa?_ Since when did he call her _Lisa_?

# Good night and... pretend it's mine #

She couldn't help but smile at those words, biting her lip, whispering in the dark a _'goodnight House'._


	18. Pills

**Chapter 18 - Pills**

 **...**

* * *

"Cuddy!" He said coming out of the bedroom, bare-chested and his shirt in one hand "I can't go to the hospital like this!" He added, watching the shirt in his own hand and then her.

Cuddy looked up and put her cup on the table looking at him with a questioning look.

"What's wrong with that?"

House looked at her with an exasperated look.

"It's ironed, Cuddy!" He said giving her a half-scowl.

Cuddy couldn't help but laugh, standing up and approaching him.

"I'll tell Theresa not to iron your shirts," she said, smiling, placing a hand on his chest and the other one on his shoulder "but ... no! You can't use it as an excuse to skip work" she added, looking into his eyes patting his shoulder with her hand.

"It's like shouting in Wilson's face that we're together" he said, embracing her and bending down to look for her lips.

"At best, it's like shouting in Wilson's face that you're with a woman. It doesn't have to be me!"

House looked at her with a look somewhere between exasperation and amusement.

"I was almost two months alone with you. Who else should it be?" He said, raising an eyebrow and wrapping her body with his arm drawing her more to himself and sucking her lip, then finding her tongue.

* * *

House's cell phone vibrated in his pocket and he checked the incoming message, taking a sip of beer straight from the bottle.

 _# Please tell me you left some Ibuprofen here somewhere. C. #_

 _Why the hell did she keep to sign herself #C # ... he knew it was her!_

"Problems?" Wilson asked, in turn taking a sip of his beer. House shook his head as he texted back.

 _# What's wrong? Are you sick? #_

He glanced at Wilson and then again at his phone as the display lit.

 _# It's nothing. Don't worry. Have fun #_

Her usual _'nothing'._ A _nothing_ that were obviously anything but nothing. She rarely call him while he was out. Ergo. That nothing wasn't a nothing.

 _# I'm gonna dump Wilson and come there #_

"A patient. Problems with the therapy" He said looking up at Wilson and putting the phone back in his pocket.

...

It took him longer than expected to free of Wilson.

He stopped in front of Cuddy door, checking his pocket just to realize that he had used the key she kept under the pot a couple of days before and had then left it in his other pair of jeans.

He used the cane to knock on the door, hoping she could hear it.

The light in the hallway stayed off but it passed less than a minute before he heard the key turning in the lock.

 _Headache. A bad headache if she avoided turning the light on..._

"Hey," she whispered, leaning on the door "Sorry..." she whispered looking up at him.

"Geez, Cuddy!" He said cupping her chin and looking into her eyes.

Pale and dark shadows under her eyes. And by the way she leaned on the door she could hardly stand.

"It's nothing. I just have a headache. And stomachache. And backache. Twelve times a year for almost thirty years... tomorrow I'll be better. I just ran out of painkillers..." she said smiling slightly.

She opened the door wider letting him enter and looked at him as he unzipped his leather jacket to take his pills bottle from his inside pocket.

He poured two in his palm as they went into the kitchen and handed them to her as she filled a glass with water.

"Did you eat something?" He asked watching as she swallowed those pills, slightly shaking her head.

"Thank you" she whispered leaning her head on his chest and embracing his waist with both arms.

"You're welcome," he said, kissing her hair and stroking her back with both hands "but you won't thank me when I'm the responsible of your ulcer" he said feeling her smile against his chest.

"C'mon... let's go to bed" he said still rubbing her back.

"Are you staying?" She asked, looking up and meeting his eyes.

"You didn't got what you've put yourself into yet, Cuddy" he said with the hint of a smile "You'll have to kick me out of your bed" he said, bowing his head down and looking for her lips in a tender kiss as she smiled in turn.

...

Cuddy watched as he unbuttoned his shirt. The pain pounding in her head made thinking difficult, but she couldn't look away from his fingers as he unbuttoned those buttons one by one, letting them slid out from each buttonhole, then letting the shirt slid from his shoulders, tossing it on the chair near the dresser, before beginning to undo his jeans.

"I'm starting to think you're an hallucination," she said looking into his eyes "Maybe actually I'm still in that bed in the Philippines" she added, stroking his stubble and savoring the feeling of his hand on her hip while his thumb stroked her almost imperceptibly. House didn't answer, just continuing to look into her eyes, but smiling slightly, then finding her lips. He felt her lips touching his before she stopped, inhaling deeply and leaning on him.

"...everything spins" she whispered, bowing her head and resting her forehead on his lips.

"Ok... come" he said, holding her as he helped her to lie down, then laying down under the sheets beside her.

He let her close her eyes in the silence of the room, simply laying beside her. He had some experience of pain. Of those moments where the only thing you want is someone near you, not suffocating you. Except that generally he was alone. For how many women had he done that? Being with a woman taking pleasure only from being near her. Nothing else.

 _Stacy?_ Yes, with her yes. Falling asleep holding her in his arms after making love... the pleasure of falling asleep together in a mix of endorphins and sweat and tiredness... yeah, but... it wasn't the same now... here there weren't any endorphins freed from an orgasm. Here there was no sweat... there was no sex... there was just her. She was the pleasure. And the pleasure was to be near her. Be there with her. Period.

...

Cuddy opened her eyes.

One of those mornings when you don't know what day it is, where you are and very nearly _who you are_.

She looked at the alarm clock. 8 a.m. Either the alarm hadn't rung or it was Saturday. But she had the strange feeling that, no, it wasn't Saturday.

She ran a hand on her forehead, turning around in the bed. The bed was unmade and the pillow was rumpled in a way in which only House could rumple it. And she smiled at that thought, reaching for the pillow and hugging him. He wasn't there anymore, but his scent was. And his jeans were still on the chair next to the dresser, along with his shirt.

She sat up on the bed, running her hand again on her forehead. The headache was almost completely gone, but she couldn't say the same of dizziness... God ... how long she didn't eat? She had to get out of bed... but first she had at least to be sure she could do it.

"Good morning"

House's voice made her look up and she met his gaze.

"Are you feeling better?" He asked, with the hint of a smile as she nodded.

He sat down on the bed beside her and kissed her lightly on the lips, then placing on the bed the plate in his hand. Scrambled eggs. And fruit.

"The only thing I found in your kitchen," he said handing her a glass of orange juice and simultaneously letting two Ibuprofen pills fall in her other hand.

He watched as she swallowed them with a long sip of orange juice. And pushed the plate toward her.

"There was cereal in the pantry," she said, taking a forkful of eggs.

"That isn't cereal, Cuddy!" He said with a half-ironic half-amused look "It's sawdust, disguised as cereal!"

She couldn't help but laugh, taking another forkful of eggs but bringing them closer to House's lips, before taking another forkful for herself.

 _Was it this? Living together?_ _It seemed so natural..._

"I have to phone Trisha" She said, looking at her watch "You shouldn't have let me sleep late" She said giving him a half-scowl that, however, turned into a smile.

"Don't be workaholic. You almost passed out last night" he said glancing at her, in turn with a reproachful glare.

"I didn't pass out, House" she replied holding his stare.

"That's why I said _almost_ , Cuddy" she replied with the same tone.

She couldn't hold back a smile and pulled him to herself, looking for his lips and then for his tongue.

"I have to take a shower ... get dressed... and go to work," she said on his lips "And... you too" she added as he smiled.

God! He wanted to join her in that shower! They would have also optimized time. Well, no! Definitely not _optimized_! He shook off that thought. Better to think of something else. He watched her as she walked out of the bathroom. Brush-haired. Already fully dressed. And he smiled, biting his lip. _Why did he have the vague feeling that she had thought the same?_

"Are you gonna give me two extra hours in the Clinic for the delay?" He asked with a vaguely mischievous look putting an arm around her waist and pulling her closer.

"Maybe I can make an exception," she said with a smile on his lips.

...

She met his eyes as he nonchalantly entered the front door of PPTH. Blue backpack on one shoulder. Unzipped leather jacket. Very late.

"House!" She called, as the two nurses behind the counter looked up at her and then in House's direction "In my office" she added, glancing at the smug smiles on those same nurses' faces while they pretended to go back to look at their documents.

"Are you keeping up appearances?" He whispered behind her as she opened her office door.

"Yes" she replied, turning and putting her arms around his neck as soon as she closed the door behind him.

She looked for his tongue and he let her explore his mouth in a long, slow, deep kiss.

"I think tomorrow I'll be late again," he said with a smile on her lips and a mischievous look "You... should take a page out of me."

"Go to work!" She said on his lips but unable not to smile as he gently cupped her ass, then walking out from her office.

She shook her head slightly, watching him walking away with the same nonchalance with which she had seen him entering the main door of the hospital.

He continued to surprise her. Always and inevitably.

And she shook her head again, smiling and biting her lip as she took from her purse the still intact blister of twenty-eight small pills where only half an hour before he had made her find yet another note.

He hadn't said anything about that. She didn't even know why she had bought it. She hadn't taken the first pill yet... basically she still had twelve hours to think about it. And... certainly she hadn't forgotten his _proposal_... Knowing him she knew that he had smiled at that "change" of _contraception_... but he hadn't comment it. He had simply left that note.

Actually she should have been annoyed because he had rummaged in her purse... but again _she wasn't._

 _* Sometimes it's not so bad to be late, Cuddy *_


	19. Like a panic attack

**Chapter 19 - Like a panic attack**

 **...**

* * *

"What was that?" Wilson asked looking at House as he walked out of Cuddy's office door, as he had done almost every day for the past decade, then looking at Cuddy through the open shutters of her French-door as she rolled her eyes and then shook her head, sitting down in her chair behind her desk.

" _That_ what?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You and Cuddy" he replied tilting his head to the side, still looking through that door and then looking at him.

House looked at him with a quizzical gaze.

"She doesn't authorize a procedure if I don't have the patient's consent first. The patient doesn't consent to the procedure... _so_... no procedure." He said, shrugging and shaking his head.

Wilson looked at him with a suspicious look.

"You two had sex" he said out of the blue, looking into his eyes.

"We didn't have sex" he replied without looking at him before looking up again "I just told her she's an idiot. Would I call _idiot_ someone I have sex with?"

Wilson looked at him with a look that was a _'I wouldn't expect anything else from you, House'_...

"Yup." He said, raising an eyebrow "Anyway... you didn't call her ' _idiot_ ', House. You told her it would be _idiotic_ not authorizing the procedure," he said, pointing a finger toward him.

House rolled his eyes.

"It would be idiotic not authorizing a procedure that she doesn't want to authorize... ergo... she's an idiot" he said, staring at him and pressing the elevator button with the tip of his cane.

Wilson continued to stare at him and House rolled his eyes again as the elevator doors opened and he got into.

He looked at Wilson, still standing in front of him, arm-crossed, and again rolled his eyes.

"And NO! I didn't have sex with her!" He said again, pressing the fourth floor button as the elevator doors closed breaking that conversation.

* * *

"Wilson asked me if we had sex." He said hugging her from behind and kissing the side of her neck.

"What did you tell him?" She asked wrapping his arms more around her own body and tilting her head back so he could continue to kiss her.

"The truth. That you and I didn't have sex. I didn't even have to lie... because of you" He said giving her a mock glare as she turned her head toward him to look at him and he kissed her lips.

"How long do you want to continue to make of me your little forbidden secret, Cuddy?" He said again, kissing the side of her neck as she tilted her head back again to be kissed more.

"How about going out for dinner on Friday?" He asked without moving his lips from her skin.

"Hhhmmm," it was her reply as she couldn't suppress a smile "like a real date, House" she asked, stroking his head as he continued to kiss her neck.

"You don't have sex on first date, but... who knows, I might be lucky" he said kissing her neck as he felt on her skin the vibrations of her laughter.

"Technically... it's our second date so..." she answered with a more excited tone than she wanted.

* * *

 _Thursday_

 _..._

Two knocks on the door distracted her attention from the report she was reading, and she checked the time on her watch. 10 p.m. It certainly wasn't House. _One_ , because he had told her not to wait for him that night, _two_ , because he had the key, and _three_ , because when he couldn't find that key he used his cane to knock on the door. She hastened to put the cup in her hand on the coffee table, leaving the documents on the couch, while the knocks on the door grew more insistent.

"Cuddy... is House here?"

She looked at Wilson with a questioning look.

"No," she said, unable to hide the hesitation in her voice "Didn't you have to go out together?"

"Yes, a few hours ago..." he said looking at his watch and then into her eyes.

"I phoned him but it keeps going straight to the voicemail. I went at his apartment but he didn't open, I supposed he isn't at home..."

Cuddy turned around, going back into her house and leaving the door open for Wilson as she took her phone, trying to call him just for being addressed to his voice mail.

"I didn't mean to bother you," Wilson said, looking at her as she looked at her cell phone "I thought maybe you called him for a case... I don't know... something like that... but he's not at the hospital yet..."

"No," she said, biting her lip and this time looking up at Wilson.

"Do you know if... I don't know... if there's someone he could be at?"

Cuddy didn't answer "Let's check his apartment again" She said, taking her purse and putting on just a cotton jacket and a pair of sneakers.

He looked at her as she looked for the key in her purse. She was a beautiful woman even in that very informal version... black leggings, a long V-neck top that covered her bottom and a cotton jacket.

"Why do you have the key of his apartment and I don't?" He asked as she put the key into the lock.

Cuddy looked at him, but didn't answer, just turning the key and opening the door.

He wasn't at home.

She checked the rooms just to be sure, but everything was as they had left it that morning. Two cups still in the kitchen sink. Crumpled sheets on the bed...

Her cell phone rang and she hurried to find it.

She looked at the number on the display. PPTH Emergency Room.

 _"Dr. Cuddy?"_

"Hello," he said looking up at Wilson. "It's me, John. What's going on?"

Wilson saw her suddenly turning pale and closing her eyes for a moment, then reopening them and looking at him again.

"Um... ok. Thanks." She said "Let me know if ... if there are some news, okay?"

"Cuddy?"

He looked at her as she looked at the floor and at the cell phone in her hand.

"Er... the police found House's bike on SR 206..." she said, looking up at him, "The man driving it is in the ER with a head trauma..."

"The man driving it?" He asked as his eyes widened at those words.

"Er ... he has _his_ wallet, but it's not _him_..." she gestured with her hand, then putting it on her forehead "... it's the reason why Dr. Stevens called me..." she said, running her hand on her forehead and then making her slid along her neck, rubbing it and inhaling deeply "... He..." she swallowed, unable to finish that sentence.

"Where the hell is House?" Wilson asked, more to himself than to her "Haven't the police questioned that guy?" He asked still watching her as she looked up again from the phone still in her hand.

"He's unconscious ..." she said, watching Wilson again "Er... he has drugs and a gun... and..." she looked away, as if she was afraid to finish that sentence out loud.

"Cuddy?"

Cuddy looked at him again realizing only in that moment that she had left the sentence hanging.

"... and the blood on his shirt isn't his" she added, looking at Wilson straight in the eyes.

A guy with a gun had House's bike and documents. And his cell phone was switched off. Even if Wilson hadn't been used to always think to the worst, always dramatizing everything, that situation would put him in anxiety anyway.

"Has none reported the theft of the bike?" He asked, looking at her as she shook her head.

"Holy shit!" Wilson exclaimed, running a hand through his hair "Call the emergency room of Mercy's ... and the one of Saint John's" he said, looking at her "... maybe he's hurt... or he bumped his head... he can be in a daze... or even worse..."

Cuddy looked at the phone in her hand, but her hand was paralyzed. Her mind was paralyzed. Her hand shook and Wilson saw her suddenly turn pale and lean on the kitchen chair before sitting down.

"Hey... are you okay?" He asked, watching her as she closed her eyes again.

She nodded, but no sound came from her lips.

 _"Did you ever have a panic attack, Cuddy?"_

Those words echoed in her mind as if he said them less than a second before...

She swallowed and called the number of Mercy Hospital. And then the one of Saint John Hospital. And then the one of the police commissioner.

"Shit!" It was the only word that came from Wilson as Cuddy closed the last phone call.

No sign of House.

 _... 'Did you ever have a panic attack, Cuddy?'_...

 _'The feeling of not being able to breathe? I did. On that flight... irrational was not being able to leave that room... not feeling the need of eating... sleeping... not feeling anything but the fear of losing you...'_

This was what she felt right now... _nothing_ , but the fear of losing him... So devastating that the only thing on which her mind could focus on was the sound of her heart in her own ears. Silence interrupted only occasionally by Wilson's voice and by the sound of his nervous footsteps on the floor.

Endless seconds that turned into minutes, coming in quick succession one after the other.

"It's almost two in the morning," he said, looking at her as she continued to stare at the phone on the table, as she had done in the last three hours "Maybe we should go home... there's nothing we can do h..."

The look Cuddy gave him, suddenly looking up, froze that word in his throat. He had known her for ten years and yet she continued to surprise him. She was a bundle of nerves, she answered only in monosyllables, and he could almost bet that her hand hadn't stopped shaking even a second from that first phone call, yet she could impose her authority with just one glare.

But he also knew her well enough to know that was clearly her way to not let anyone tell what was in her mind.

"Lisa... go and get at least some sleep" he tried again with a softer tone, nodding toward House's bedroom.

Cuddy didn't replied, just staring at him. Sitting on the couch, his elbows resting on his knees. His featured probably as tired as hers. She could see herself mirrored in his eyes, by the way he looked at her... What she was, not what she pretended to be. She bowed her head, looking away and putting a hand over her eyes. She wanted to cry. Maybe crying would have eased the burden she felt inside her, the knot closing her throat and the feeling of nausea completely closing her stomach.

They both suddenly looked up to the sound of the key in the lock, looking into each other eyes for what seemed like ages before they turned their heads, meeting House's eyes in the exact moment in which the door opened.

"Holy Christ, House!" Wilson exclaimed, immediately standing up as soon as he saw him entering the door on his legs.

He approached him, meeting his tired and questioning look.

"What's up?"

"WHAT'S UP?" Wilson repeated in exasperation as his voice came out of his throat at least an octave higher than usual. "The police found your bike on the 206, and a guy with your documents... we thought you were injured or even dead... your phone is off... where the hell have you been?"

House ignored his words, immediately moving his eyes on Cuddy, sitting on one of the kitchen chairs. She was looking at him, her hand on her mouth. He moved Wilson with one hand and left his leather jacket on the couch, going toward her.

"Hey, it's all right," he said looking into her eyes. She wasn't crying, but her irises trembled like her hand, and probably like her lips under her own hand.

 _"Oh my God, House..."_ were the only words that came from her lips as she stood up and threw her arms around his neck.

"Cuddy," He said, holding her in his arms while she hid her face on his chest, inhaling his scent "... hey... it's all right..." he repeated, still stroking her shoulders and back "Cuddy, it's all right, I'm here..." he repeated, kissing her hair.

He searched her face, taking it with both hands and looking into her eyes.

"I..." she whispered "... oh my God, House... I thought y..."

He found her lips, preventing her from ending that sentence and kissing her tenderly, then looking for her tongue.

Wilson was still standing by the door. A look that was somewhere between amazement and confirmation of a theory.

The only time he had seen Cuddy like that had been that one time in her office, after House had told her she didn't deserve to be a mother. The exact opposite of the Cuddy who was in front of him just one second before. And he wasn't sure he had ever seen House that way. Caring. Worried. He looked away, smiling slightly and running a hand through his hair.

"Hey House, get a room" he said, laughing to dull his embarrassment.

Cuddy smiled and looked at House, running her tongue on her lips as he wiped with his thumbs the tears now rolling down her cheeks.

"Where were you?" She whispered, looking into his eyes.

House looked at her. She was still shaking. The adrenaline was the only thing that keep her standing. He leaded her on the couch, making her sit down again, and sitting down beside her. His arm still around her waist and her hand clasped in his.

"Make yourself useful." He said looking at Wilson. "Make an herbal tea."

Wilson looked at him with a very surprised look.

"Whoa, House!" He said, shaking his head "This relationship really messed you" he said, staring at him.

"Not for me, you idiot! For her." He said, rolling his eyes to him.

...

Wilson had left them alone after about twenty minutes. And he had the decency not to ask them too many questions. Their cover was definitely blown, but the last thing they needed that night was a grilling mixed with a good dose of psychological analysis. They were going to answer all his questions... sooner or later... they couldn't avoid it actually... they honestly didn't even intend to conceal their relationship... simply they didn't want comments, suggestions, or someone telling them how crazy they were.

He definitely needed a shower. But the only thing they both really needed at that moment was a night of sleep. Possibly together. Possibly embraced.

"Come," he said reaching for her and making her get up from the couch.

"Better?" He asked, looking into her eyes and stroking her back, stopping at the edge of the bed.

She replied with a nod and the hint of a smile.

"I haven't been hearing your voice for more than half an hour, Cuddy" he said smiling, cupping her face with one hand and stroking her cheekbone with his thumb as she bent her neck to that feeling, lingering in that caress.

"I'm fine," she said, smiling slightly "I should be the one asking you. What happened, House? Where were you?"

"Nobody trusts giving a guy a ride anymore," he said, slowly unbuttoning one by one the couple of buttons of her cotton jacket "It took me a lifetime to walk to the police commissioner" he said, looking into her eyes, making the jacket slide slowly from her shoulders and along her arms, then leaving it at the edge of the bed "that asshole took my phone too... I didn't... I didn't think that idiot of Wilson was going to come to you..." he said, stroking her arms.

She met his eyes as she let his hands look for her bra straps, slipping them under the short sleeves of her T-shirt, then sliding them along her arms. She smiled, stroking in turn his stubble as he unhooked her bra clasp without removing her shirt, rubbing her back through the fabric while her bra fell on the floor. Not a passionate gesture. But stronger than passion.

"Didn't you try to..." she whispered, looking at him again and hesitating, looking for the right word. _Defend yourself? Fight? Break his head with your cane?_

House shook his head, shrugging slightly.

"He had a gun. And two legs. I had... a cane and only one good leg," he said with a bitter smile, shaking his head "I'm a lot of things, but not stupid, Cuddy."

She stroked his stubble with both hands, brushing his lips with her thumbs.

"But you thought about doing it" she said looking into his eyes.

He didn't answer, just looking at her in what was an unequivocal _I did._

"So... why did you change your mind?" She asked, looking at his lips and then again at his eyes. She knew how much proud he was. He definitely wasn't the kind of guy giving up in front of a provocation...

"I already got a bullet once" He replied looking into her eyes "And I'm not gonna take another one. Even less now, since I'm still waiting to have sex with you" he said, playing down that moment, putting his hands on hers and watching her as she couldn't help but smile at those words, although she bit her lip again to keep it from trembling.

"What a stupid" she said, still smiling, putting her arms around his neck and looking for his lips.

"And... I want you to be my wife before being a widow" he said as her smile faded from her face and she bit more on her lip, looking away, as if she were about to cry.

She shook her head, taking his face with both hands.

"Don't ever say that" she whispered on his lips "House, I..."

"Don't say it," he whispered, brushing her lips with his thumb "not tonight..." he said looking into her eyes, still stroking her lips.

He kissed her lightly on the lips, then deepening that kiss, looking for her tongue. Slowly and deeply. He wanted that word... but not tonight. Not like that...

He looked at her as she opened her eyes, parting from her lips and simply taking her hand, pulling her on the bed and under the sheets.

Neither of them spoke as they lay on the bed facing each other, just looking into each other's eyes. He felt her hand stroking his back, sliding her fingers under the hem of his T-shirt and lingering on that tiny inch of skin.

He felt her hand taking his, then resting it on her hip, and moving it in turn under the hem of her T-shirt, silently inviting him to caress her.

He knew she wanted him. That night even more than any other night. And he wanted her. That night even more than any other night. Holding her in his arms, feeling her body beneath his. Feeling she was his more than she already was. But not tonight... not only to give vent to the tension of that night... not only because of fear...

"I want you more than anything else, Cuddy," he whispered on her lips moving his hand down to tease the elastic band of her panties "...but... not tonight..." he said, brushing her lips. "Do you think you can just sleep with me again?" He asked seeing her smiling and nodding.

"I want nothing else" she said, smiling, clutching in his arms, then turning and once again resting her back against his chest, letting him breathing in her hair, holding her close.

She was in his arms. And he wanted nothing else.


	20. You can't always get what you want

**Chapter 20 -** _ **You can't always get what you want**_

 _ **...**_

 _... You can't always get what you want..._

She smiled at Mick Jagger's words in the background, bending down to kiss House on the neck as he placed the CD case on the coffee table near the stereo. In the end they weren't go out for dinner on that Friday. House had had a case that kept him busy the whole weekend, which had definitely blown their plans up.

They hadn't brought the subject up anymore. The subjects. Well... at least not in a serious way. She smiled at the thought of how he was continuing to repeat her that _'say yes'_ in his own _unconventional_ way. This was House. This would always be House. And she knew it.

House watched her as she distractedly rubbed her neck with one hand and her back with the other one, and put his hands on her shoulders, from behind, starting to massage her, then bending down to kiss her neck.

"Are you testing my self-control again?" She said, laughing, turning her head slightly and stroking his stubble.

"Here the only one testing mine is you" he said, smiling and again kissing the side of her neck, sliding his fingers along the muscles of her spine at the same time, pressing harder in some spots and lighter in others.

A moan escaped her lips as soon as his fingers reached the point of her back where her dorsal muscles continued in the lumbar ones, tracing the line of her spine. House couldn't help but smile, running his tongue on his lips and again kissing the side of her neck.

"Do that again and I swear it won't be the only one escaping from your lips, Cuddy" He said, still with his lips on her neck, kissing, or rather _sucking_ , behind her ear.

He heard her inhaling deeply to that feeling and holding her breath, striving to not let out another moan from her lips.

He teased her. Continuously. She wouldn't have expected anything different from him. But what she wouldn't have expected was that he never went beyond that. That he agreed with her in wanting to base their relationship on something stronger than sex. Well... maybe not _agree_ , but he respected her will.

Had he always been like that? She knew there was a part of him that he didn't allow anyone to see. She knew he was more than the sarcastic asshole with which she argued every day. With whom she liked to argue every day.

She turned to him letting his hands slipping around her body as she turned and put her arms around his neck, looking into his eyes.

"I hope you're not going to look elsewhere for what I'm not giving you" she said smiling, looking at him with a mischievous look and touching his lips.

House replied holding her gaze and biting her lip, then sucking it between his lips.

"What you give me isn't that bad, Cuddy," he said smiling mischievously and moving a hand on her butt, squeezing one of her buttocks in the palm of the hand, then giving her a little spanking.

She smiled, looking at him straight in the eye and brushing his tongue.

"You have your needs," she said smiling again.

"I have the shower" he replied, looking at her as she rolled her eyes and let out a small laugh.

"So... are you fine like that? Don't you want anything else?" She asked, raising an eyebrow with a challenge look.

"You know what I want," he replied, staring at her with a piercing look.

"What?" She asked, more because she want to hear it than because she didn't already know. She knew he wanted her body. He wanted that deep intimacy that they didn't have yet. And she knew it because actually she wanted the same. And she was as tired of waiting as he was.

And yet... his answer surprised her again...

"I want a yes," he said, looking into her eyes "that yes... and more than a yes... yes to be mine _in all the possible ways_ "

Cuddy looked at him slightly biting her lip and smiling, waiting for his usual joke after that statement. Probably a sexual innuendo... with some not-too-hidden references to how much he wanted her _in every possible way_... her, her mouth and her ass... But a joke that this time didn't come.

"So... aren't you really going to change your mind?" She asked him as she couldn't help but bite her lip as she felt his hands hold her closer to him.

She felt his hesitation at those words and felt his hands loosen up a little their grip on her waist.

"Is that what you want? That I change my mind?" He said, looking into her eyes.

"No, but..."

 _But..._

"but... you're crazy," she said, looking in turn in his eyes and smiling slightly. A smile that this time he didn't return.

"Of you" he answered seriously without moving an inch, continuing to stare at her as she smiled and closed her eyes, shaking her head slightly.

"No," she said, however brushing his lips with hers "You are really crazy" she said, looking at him.

He let her lightly brush his lips, but the expression in his eyes didn't change. And he didn't kiss back.

"Why? Because I trust in us, Cuddy?" He asked, seeing the look in her eyes immediately change to those words.

"You think it won't last," he added, continuing to look into her eyes.

Cuddy opened her mouth to answer, but he didn't give her time to reply.

The last thing he wanted was to hear another _'if'_ or another _'but'_ ...

"That's why a _fucking I_ _love you_ isn't enough, Cuddy," he said, shaking his head and letting go of the grip of his arms around her waist.

The look in his eyes froze her.

 _A fucking 'I love you'?_

"House ..."

He silenced her with his eyes. A slap would have hurt her less than that look. Of that silent _'shut up!'_

"I don't need an 'I love you' to know what I want! Apparently... your _damned 'I love you'_ is not strong enough to want a baby with me... or to want being my wife."

"House no..." she said, trying to reach for his arm.

He glared at her again and stepped back, preventing her from touching his arm, then running a hand through his hair.

"You were willing to get knocked up by the first available idiot!" He hissed without looking at her, as if that was just a thought said out loud.

Her lip began to tremble as she couldn't stop tears from appearing now in her eyes.

"Don't cry!" He said in a so sharp tone that she breathed in as if she had been pierced by a knife.

And she swallowed, looking away and trying to hold back tears. Tears that for the first time increased his anger.

"You're the one who wanted to be _more._.. What the fuck is for you that _more_ , Cuddy?"

He watched her as she looked up at him. But again he didn't let her speak. He was tired. Tired of her bullshits. Tired of her _if_ and _but_. It had taken them twenty years to get to this point. He wasn't willing to wait another twenty.

 _"You're_ a _selfish egocentric son of a bitch_ _!"_ _she had said him that night, thousands miles away._

"Here the only _selfish egocentric bitch_ it's you" he said using the same words she had used to hurt him.

Because he knew exactly how hurting her! He knew exactly what buttons to push to hurt her.

 _... bitch ..._

He watched as she looked down, biting her lower lip completely.

 _Goal!_

She closed her eyes and tears inexorably rolled down her cheeks. And she swallowed, opening her eyes, but not looking up.

Tears that again increased his anger. A river that couldn't be stopped anymore. And a bitter laugh sounded from his lips as he accidentally brushed her, passing near her and reaching for his jacket.

"Don't worry" he said coldly, in a piercing and sarcastic tone "I'm not going to get my hands on you" he added as he couldn't not notice the way she had startled to that contact.

 _Fuck you, Cuddy! Do you really think I would lay my hands on you ?!_

He shook his head.

"Ironic," he said sarcastically "you're the only bitch who didn't want to be fucked!" He added, unable to restrain himself, this time without looking at her.

"Hous ..."

Not even the sound of his name almost choked in her throat cracked his anger. And his disappointment. And the bitterness. The words that he had just screamed at her were nothing compared to how much she had hurt him...

"Keep your fucking _I love you_ , Cuddy," he said going towards the door without meeting her eyes "I don't know what to do with that!"

She called him again, trying to grab his hand. Even if he was going to slap her, there was no way he could hurt her more than he already did.

But he just pulled her hand away. He didn't turn around. And he left, slamming the door.

* * *

 _Jeez!_ How had they come to this! She almost hope he could have beat her up. Maybe physical pain would have mitigated the mental pain.

She met her own eyes in the mirror. Swollen and red with tears.

She lowered the zipper of her dress. Her hand was still shaking and all she could think about was that look in his eyes.

 _Apparently... your damned 'I love you' is not strong enough to want a baby with me... or to want being my wife._

God ... _his_ hand would have had to be the one lowering that zipper that night, letting that dress drop on the ground as he kissed her neck...

 _... You're the only bitch who doesn't want to be fucked..._

She looked at herself in the mirror. A black lace outfit. The partial transparency of the lace that let half-view of her skin. No push-up, no balconette... that bra just held her breasts in the most natural way. Sensual and simple at the same time.

 _... Or something more natural, I'm an old-fashioned guy, Cuddy..._

She unhooked her bra, biting her lip as she let it fall on the ground.

 _... fucked ..._

No, it wasn't _being fucked_ what she had planned for that night...

 _... Keep your fucking I love you ..._

 _God ..._ she ran a hand through her hair, unable to hold back tears...


	21. Postcard from the Philippines

_Here I am. First of all, thank you to everyone who met me in the one-shot I posted two days ago. Wait... did you really think I turned into a Hameron fan? No way! If you didn't read that and you're wondering what I'm talking about, well, just go and look for 'Hidden Truths' ;)_

 _...but in the meantime, I hope you'll love the finale of this fanfic. Lenasti16, thank you so much again!_

* * *

 _..._

 **Chapter 21 - Postcard from the Philippines**

...

* * *

 _... I want a yes... that yes... and more than a yes... yes to be mine in all the possible ways..._

 _... Am I crazy because I trust in us, Cuddy? ... You think it won't last..._

 _... Apparently... your damned 'I love you' is not strong enough to want a baby with me... or to want being my wife..._

 _... Here the only selfish egocentric bitch it's you..._ _the only bitch who didn't want to be fucked..._

 _... Keep your fucking I love you, Cuddy... I don't know what to do with that!..._

 _..._

She couldn't think. She couldn't breathe.

"Cuddy? Is it all right?"

"Yes, Wilson" she said, just glancing at him as she paid her bowl of salad and took some plastic cutlery from the basket "Sorry... I have to go. I need to finish my report for this afternoon meeting" she said, smiling slightly and resting a hand on his arm before walking away.

She continued to watch the untouched plastic bowl resting on her desk. Just to throw it in the trash a few minutes later.

 _# Please. Stop by. We need to talk #_ She texted on her cell phone, then pressing enter and looking at her cell phone display... waiting for an answer that never came.

She hadn't slept that night. And that one was just another unanswered text. He didn't answer her texts. He didn't answer her calls. She knew she could go to his office, but a row in the hallway was the last thing she wanted. Being called a bitch in the middle of that hallway was the last thing she wanted...

 _... Apparently... your damned 'I love you' is not strong enough to want a baby with me... or to want being my wife..._

"God, you're so wrong, House..." she whispered in the silence of that room.

...

* * *

"What's wrong with Cuddy?" Wilson asked entering House's office.

"Why are you asking me?" He curtly replied without looking up from his magazine.

"She wasn't fine..." he said, ignoring how he answered to his question with another question "In ten years I never saw her going home even earlier than you"

He studied his expression and the way in which those words washed over him.

"I'm not her babysitter" he replied, again without looking up at him.

Wilson snorted.

"Right! You're her boyfriend. Don't screw it up, House," he said with an exasperated look.

"You'll be surprised, Wilson, but I'm not the one screwing it up!" He said, this time looking up and glaring at him.

Wilson shook his head, looking at his own feet and then looked up at him again.

"Is the honeymoon already over?" He asked with a disconsolate look.

"Probably it never started" he replied, looking down at his magazine again.

Wilson sighed again and looked around.

"How is it possible that in your office there's never any place to sit?" He said looking at the chair in front of himself and moving a stack of magazines, books, envelopes and letters from it.

"How long aren't you checking on your mail, House?" He asked leafing through those envelopes.

"What the fuck do you care of mail, Wilson. Nobody uses that kind of mail anymore. At most there will be a few charges. Stuff for Cuddy!" He said testily, again without looking up. "Bring those to her! It's probably her only way to have an orgasm!"

Wilson looked at him again with the same exasperated look.

"Honeymoon definitely over!" He said, shaking his head and sighing again.

 _Shit! He had trust in them! They looked so..._

"Someone still uses the old mail" he said watching the postcard between his hands.

 _Sea, palm trees... nice place..._

House looked up and snatched it out of his hand before he had time to focus on it.

 _Blue sea... palm trees..._

He turned it.

 _A 40-pesos stamp. The postmark of a Philippine post office, dated April 15. His address. No sender. No signature. Only one word..._

 _A single word written in blue ink on a white background._

"What's up?" Wilson asked with a quizzical look.

House didn't answer, merely looking up at him and then down again at the unmistakable handwriting of that address and then at that one word.

 _OO_

* * *

 _... yes_

* * *

He knocked on the door. He could directly use the key in his pocket, but he didn't want to scare her unexpectedly breaking into her house. Not after how he had slammed that same door less than 24 hours earlier.

He knocked at the door again, using his cane in what had become his card, but again no one answered the door. She was at home. Her car was parked in the driveway in front of the garage. _"She wasn't fine... in ten years I never saw her going home even earlier than you"_ Wilson had told him half an hour before... and even if he was rationally aware that she probably didn't feel so bad not to be able to come and open the door, his heartbeat quickened as he rummaged in his jacket pocket for the key.

He called her name as soon as the key turned in the lock and the door opened. He didn't shout her name, he simply _called_ her name, but that name seemed to echoed louder in the silence of the room as he closed the door behind himself.

Cuddy was in the bathroom when she heard that _"Cuddy"_ and stood still for a second, closing the water running in the sink and looking into the mirror as for a moment she listened just the sound of silence before recognizing the usual rhythmical sound of wood on the floor accompanying House's steps.

She wiped her tears with both hands and hurried to take her terrycloth bathrobe only in an instinctive gesture, because actually by now the last thing she cared about was her wet hair dripping on the floor. She opened the bathroom door tying the sash of her bathrobe and almost bumped into him, suddenly looking up at him.

"House, I..."

And he didn't give her the time to finish that sentence.

He took her face with both hands and found her mouth, letting the postcard still in his hand falling on the floor. And his tongue invaded her mouth as she didn't make a stand.

God... he could feel the salty taste of her tears on her tongue. And he kissed her like he never did. Passion that quickly became something bordering on devotion, in a kiss gradually slower but not less deep. Silence broken only by the sound of their breathing.

"I'm an idiot," he whispered, not opening his eyes, parting from her lips only for a moment but still feeling the warmth of her breath on his own mouth. If he wanted to say something else, she didn't give him time to do that. Her mouth found his again, closing again the infinitesimal distance between them.

Cuddy stroked his hair, holding him close. Her arms around his neck and her fingers lost through his hair as she realized of being on tiptoe. On tiptoe so her mouth could be almost at his level. To be sure not letting him go away. Not anymore. Not that he had the slightest intention of going away. His arms around her body held her close to him, so close that they were almost one.

She rested the soles of her feet back against the floor without letting go of his mouth and he simply leaned more on her, without that kiss was perturbed at all by those eight-inch difference. Action-reaction. Third motion law. _For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction._

Equal and opposite. _Opposites._ As the roughness of his stubble against her skin and the softness of his lips on hers. _Opposites_ as the warmth of his breath lost in hers and the shivers that same breath gave down her spine. _Opposites._ Like them.

"I'm really an idiot..." he repeated, parting only for a moment from her lips to look into her eyes.

This time a smile lit up her eyes, and she stroked his stubble, brushing his lower lip with her thumb.

"Tell me something I don't know" she said smiling again and staring at him.

House stared back at her, with a look that left her almost breathless. He stroked her cheek with his thumb, as for a moment it was just their eyes talking.

"I love you" he whispered looking into her eyes and at the look in her eyes at the sound of those words.

Her irises quivered but she didn't look away and a smile appeared on her lips again as she let out the air she had held in her lungs, realizing just now that she was actually holding her breath. She looked away just for a second, looking up as tears misted her eyes, and swallowed, then looking again into his eyes, getting lost in them.

"I love you" House repeated, watching her as she smiled more, however closing her eyes and failing to prevent a tear from rolling down her cheek.

He wiped that tear away with his thumb and watched as she opened her eyes and bit her lip, smiling. He looked at those lips, red for the rubbing against his stubble, and she looked at his, still moist because of their kiss. And their lips touched again. Just one light touch.

"God, Cuddy... you... you sent it two weeks ago," he whispered on her lips looking into her eyes as she smiled slightly.

"I have to send a complaint to the Filipino postal service" She said with a smile on his lips as he smiled in turn, watching his lips and then his eyes again.

"Say it" he whispered on her lips, still looking into her eyes without moving an inch from her mouth.

"Ask it to me again" she said in turn, looking at him with the same look and failing not to smile more.

He caressed her cheeks with his thumbs, still staring at her eyes and lips.

"Are you really crazy enough to be my wife?" He said with a smile on her lips as he couldn't help but giving his own personal way to that too classical proposal.

He looked at her as she smiled and bit her lip.

"No," she whispered with a smile on his lips and shook her head slightly, still staring at him.

That NO wasn't the answer he was waiting for... but the way she was looking at him was anything but a _no_. And he held her tightly.

"I'm _so_ _crazy_ that I want to be your wife ... so crazy to want a child with you. With you, House... not from you... So crazy to want to be yours... in every possible way," she whispered on his lips.

House smiled still looking into her eyes.

"... in every possible way?" He asked with a very mischievous look stroking her cheekbone with his thumb and looking at her as she nodded, not looking away from the blue of his eyes.

 _Beautiful._ It was the only word that came to his mind when he looked at her. Even with her red and swollen eyes because of the too much crying and her wet and uncombed hair.

He looked for her mouth, and for her tongue. Deeply and slowly. God, he wanted her! He wanted her as he had never wanted a woman in his life... His knee slowly moved between her thighs, closing even more the distance between them and she held her breath to that feeling. They could feel the warmth spreading from their bodies, despite the layers of fabric still between them. And she hadn't even realized she had slightly opened her legs allowing him doing that... she had just done that... in the most natural way. Trapped between the door jamb and him. And she didn't want to be anywhere else. She didn't want him to be anywhere else than between her legs.

He held her into his arms trapping her more between the wall and his body. _God..._ was there a better feeling than her body pressed to his?

"Hous... hhhmmm"

Part of his name was replaced by a moan and a sigh as he kissed her behind the ear, sucking her skin and making her tilt her neck to be kissed even more as his hand moved from her face to her neck and then under the soft terrycloth of her bathrobe.

His erection pressed relentlessly against her leg and his leg against her most intimate part short-circuiting her neurons. She felt like she was burning.

"House..." she tried again, this time being at least able to finish his name before another deep sigh escaped her lips.

Could she have an orgasm without being touched? Just for that slight rubbing of his jeans against her? _Holy God..._ his tongue on her neck made contract the muscles in her lower abdomen and she felt her inner muscles throbbing in anticipation. Had she never wanted a man so much?

"Hou... hhhmmm" she sighed again to the sensation of his tongue on the part of her cleavage not covered by her bathrobe, gripping the hair on his nape as he lifted his head to look at her.

"Please... tell me it's not another no?" He said looking into her eyes.

But the smile on her lips was again far from a _no_ , as she slid his leather jacket off his shoulders and arms, dropping it on the ground. And far from a no was her hand that took his, leading him to her bed.

House stood still as she looked at him and let her slowly unbutton his shirt, watching her fingers that unbuttoned those buttons one by one. Her hands caressed his skin following the anatomy of his shoulders and chest muscles, lingering for a moment on his collarbone and breastbone before going down on his abs, then focusing on his belt buckle. She looked at him straight in the eyes as she unbuttoned even that button, just slightly touching his erection with her fingertips through the fabric of his boxers as she lowered his zipper, then sliding his jeans down his legs.

She looked into his eyes and he looked into hers. Blue lost in blue. He didn't need to repeat that ' _I love you'._ At that moment his eyes shouted it out loud.

She smiled, placing his hand on the knot of her bathrobe sash silently inviting him to untied it. House looked at his own hand on that knot. At the two ends of that sash that his own hands were untying and at the two side of that soft terrycloth parting. He held his breath as soon as his eyes lingered on her skin. On the still tanned skin after that week of sea and on the white skin on which neither the sun nor his eyes had never been, not in the last twenty years. He knew she was naked under that bathrobe but his body reacted to that information as if it had realized it only at that time. His breathing quickened, as well as his heartbeat. He didn't touch her, just looking at her as he slid the bathrobe off her shoulders as she had done with him only a few moments before, then stroking her shoulder and arm, looking at his own hand moving on her skin. He caressed her shoulders again, this time moving down on her breasts and along the curve of her waist, stopping on her hip and caressing her again before drawing her closer to him, looking up into her eyes and looking again for her lips and tongue in a slow and deep... and sweet and sensual... kiss.

He wrapped her waist with one arm as he made her lay down on the bed, then falling on top of her without breaking away from her mouth. Feeling her opening her legs under him was a stronger feeling than he imagined. And even hearing her holding her breath and shivering beneath him to the rubbing of her most intimate part against his erection, although there was still a layer of cloth between them. He felt her hands moving under his boxer, stroking his buttocks and at the same time pulling him even closer to her and between her legs.

He kissed her neck, teasing her skin with his lips and tongue, then moving down on her breast. She moaned at the feeling of his tongue on her nipple, digging her fingers into his back and arching her back as he continued to suck her. A _hhhmmm_ of protest escaped her lips as soon as his mouth left her breast, but replaced by a moan of pleasure as soon as his tongue drew a line of wet kisses from her sternum to her navel , pausing only a moment to tease her navel with his tongue as she tilted her head back and arched her back even more.

"Oh God, House..." she moaned, lifting her head to look at him and meeting his gaze. His hands on her hips and her tongue on her skin... it was so erotic that she couldn't suppress the urge to push her pelvis towards him, moaning again at the sensation of that rubbing against him.

House smiled, looking into her eyes before continuing on his way down, moving his hands on her hips and stroking her legs, first with his fingers and then with his mouth, kissing her knee and brushing his lips along the inner side of her thigh.

If it hadn't been the best torture she could possibly think about, she would have said he was torturing her. And she inhaled deeply, holding her breath as his mouth found her most sensitive spot.

 _God..._ his mouth on her erased every thought.

His tongue kept touching her strong enough to keep her constantly in a sort of ecstasy... and she felt like she was on the edge of a cliff as he didn't allow her to go further.

"God, House... please..." she moaned.

She stroked his nape letting her fingers move through his hair, before moving her hand on his stubble and on his face slightly pushing him away from her as he lifted his head and back to look at her. Her arm slightly pushed him towards the edge of the bed forcing him to stand up as she sat up, then kneeling on the bed.

The quizzical look in his eyes turned into a mischievous smile at the realization of what she was going to do. He looked for her mouth and tongue as her hands wormed their way into the rubber band of his boxers, then making them slide down his buttocks and legs to the floor.

Her hand wrapped him as she kissed him and his groan got lost in her mouth to that feeling. Her mouth left his to trace in turn a row of kisses along his chest and his abdomen, then pausing only a moment to look at him. _God... she had craved doing this for twenty years._ After each argue... after each fight about a risky procedure... as she touched herself thinking of him... she just wanted to feel him in her mouth.

She stroked his thighs with both hands, looking up at him and biting her lip.

"Cuddy..." he whispered looking into her eyes.

She felt his hesitation in those five letters of her name... and she knew it wasn't for what she was about to do to him, but because she was too close to what he considered his most vulnerable part. The sign of his weakness. Of his disability.

She didn't answer and just looked at him again before bending over him. The tip of her tongue ran along his length, pausing to suck the tip and then going down again. One time. And then another. And yet another.

His hand through her hair instinctively urged her to take it more into her mouth, but it wasn't what she had in mind to do. Her lips moved on his thigh and she felt him shiver almost imperceptibly while another _'Cuddy ...'_ escaped from his lips... this time accompanied by a _'no'_ that yet she ignored.

She kissed his skin and her tongue slowly and lightly touched his scar, sending an unexpected shiver in his lower abdomen. And even more unexpectedly hardening him even more. He gripped her hair with both hands and she moved again her tongue along his thigh and then along his erection.

The feeling of her mouth teasing him, just lightly sucking him, was driving him crazy. She had done that hundreds, maybe thousands of times... _in his fantasies_... but reality far exceeded his expectations. Perhaps because he have been craving her for twenty years... or maybe because those last two months had practically been two months of foreplay... but... _fuck!..._

He held his breath as soon as she took him deeply and completely in her mouth, and for a moment he thought he couldn't restrain himself. _Fuck..._ he couldn't stand that. He couldn't stand the warmth of her mouth. Even less when she relentlessly speeded her pace. He grasped her hair more, making her look up at him. That _'come here'_ almost choked in his throat, but he took her face with both hands, making her straighten her back, then finding her mouth and tongue.

His mouth never left hers as he made her lay down on the bed again. His weight on her. Trapped between the mattress and his body. As on that couch ... that night thousands miles away. He heard her inhaling deeply and holding her breath to that feeling, opening her eyes and meeting his. Blue lost in blue. He looked at her eyes and then at her lips. Those slightly parted lips... exactly like that night. But this time a smile appeared on those lips and her hands stroked his stubble at the same time, then joining at the back of his neck, holding him in that position. She wasn't going to allow him running away again. And running away was his last thought right now... as his erection brushed her entrance, teasing it, without going beyond.

"Love me, House..." she whispered on his lips, slightly lifting one leg and wrapping it around his butt in a silent but explicit invitation before touching his lips again.

He didn't looked away from her eyes and didn't leave her lips as he slid inside her, making her savor every inch of him and enjoying every inch of her. They both held their breath to that intense feeling, closing their eyes for a moment before opening them to look into each other's eyes again, then again looking for their mouths and letting their tongue to tangle at the same pace of their breathing... and at the same pace of their bodies.

Slow and deep... as if they were making love for the first time. Because in a sense they were making love for the first time. Sex. And at the same time so far from sex. Not a mere instinctive pursuit of pleasure... love and passion inextricably tied together. Her pleasure inextricably tied to his.

"Oh... yes..." she moaned tilting her head back and arching her back as he moved over her and into her, meeting her pace with every thrust.

"Oh God, House, yes..." she moaned, digging her fingers into his back again and this time, hiding her face in the crook of his neck and clutching more to him.

House recognized the trembling of her legs as he kissed her. He opened his eyes to look at her as soon as her mouth left his and she inhaled deeply in what was almost a gasp, then holding her breath. _God..._ the way she arched her back again. The way she tilted her head back. The way her eyelashes slightly fluttered as she kept her eyes closed and her lips parted. And that _yes_ repeated endlessly, together with his name.

He closed his eyes to the feeling that the sight of her pleasure triggered... He felt his muscles contracting and the pressure in his testicles increased to the extreme, while the contractions of her orgasm exacerbated that pleasure. And... ... _fuck_... he knew very well that sensation... that extreme pleasure then followed by the feeling of release of ejaculation... but... _'God, Cuddy ...'_ ... coming inside her... skin to skin... without barriers... the bare thought was...

Every thought faded, giving way only to pleasure, his mingling with hers. It wasn't just release and relaxation... it was pure bliss.

He buried his head in the crook of her neck, breathing her scent while her fingers moved among his hair and they both tried to catch their breath. He could feel her smile even if he wasn't looking at her... and she could feel his. He kissed her neck and lifted his head, resting his forehead on hers and looking into her eyes.

"I told you I was going to make you scream that _yes_ " he said with a mischievous look watching her as she closed her eyes and ran her tongue on her lips, smiling. He kissed her lips again as she stroked the hair of his nape.

He looked into her eyes, biting her lower lip and sucking it between his own lips, not averting his eyes from hers.

"You know I'm gonna make you scream _that yes_ every day of your life, don't you?" He said, raising an eyebrow mischievously, as this time a laugh escaped from her lips and she kissed him tenderly on the lips.

"Is it a challenge?" She asked with a smile just as mischievous as his, watching his lips and then his eyes again, still stroking his neck.

"A promise" He said, touching her lips and looking again for her tongue in another long, deep kiss.

...

 **THE END**

...

* * *

Thank you to all of you again!

I'll be back, sooner than you think. Actually I have more than a work in progress. The first chapter of the next one is just waiting to be posted. My first attempt of fixing the unfixable.

See you soon


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